Some bloke from the 90’s announces his “new name”

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Some bloke that you sort of remember from the 1990's but you can't really remember why has stepped up his irrelevance by announcing a...
Gerard Butler

Hollywood bimbo Gerard Butler says it never occurred to him that injecting bee venom...

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Hollywood bimbo, Gerard Butler has been hospitalised with anaphylactic shock his agent has revealed. Butler, injected 13 vials of bee venom in an attempt to...
pippa

Pippa Middleton topless photos break internet

Still recovering from the profound damage caused by that picture of Kim Kardashian's arse a while back, the Interweb was dealt yet another bitter...

Prue Leith reveals Hawking final theory

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Prue Leith, the famous cook, presenter and writer was recorded by several bystanders shouting Stephen Hawking’s ‘theory of everything’ at police while being detained...
Castle in woods

Icons of children’s entertainment to take refuge for the rest of 2017

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Children’s authors, presenters and actors are seeking hiding places for the rest of 2017, the Rochdale Herald has learned. This year has seen, in very...

Rochdale Christmas light turn on will be a Britain First

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This year's celebrity flicker of Rochdale's Christmas light will be none other than high flying anti-Muslim racist bigots and all round general socialites, Paul...

Fatboy runs away from the Ball

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The worlds biggest celebrity couple, Ball and Slim, have sadly announced they are to divorce after 18 years of party-hard marriage.

Gallagher in filthy pool party outrage

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Our colleagues at the Swindon Advertiser have told us that bacteria in the water has resulted in the Oasis pool being shut for the...

Darth Vader Faces CSA Action for Non Payment of Child Support

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Darth Vader is facing a catastrophic attachment to earnings over claims of non-payment of child support. The alleged offense occurred a long time ago in...

Prince Harry gets job as Prince Harry look-alike

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Prince Harry has a new job as a Prince Harry look-alike in Canada. His new boss told us, "There's a lot of attention on Prince...

Farage delighted to be named UK’s top racist

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Following numerous occasions where he was always the bridesmaid, Nigel Farage is now delighted to be at the top of his tree in his...
Paul Dacre

Is Daily Mail Editor Paul Dacre the most flaccid cockgoblin in the UK?

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Unsubstantiated sources allege Dacre is comfortably the vilest hate-peddling shitweasel in the UK. Feel free to tell us if you disagree with these allegations. But...

Jennifer Aniston found dead after Schadenfreude overdose

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Jennifer Aniston was found dead this afternoon at her LA mansion after apparently overdosing on Schadenfreude following the news of the impending Brangelina split. Miss...
Michael McIntyre

Comic Relief to be just Michael McIntyre and a bunch of Russells in future

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The BBC announced today that all future Comic Relief events will simply be Michael McIntyre and people called Russell running around and doing observational...

Jeremy Vine in road rage incident.

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Television and radio opinion blower Jeremy Vine was subjected to a road rage incident while cycling to work in London yesterday.  He was followed and...

Katie Price Fails 5 Minutes Into Her Attempt To Go A Whole Day Without...

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Three days ago the former glamour model Katie Price, also known as Libya, attempted to last a whole day without doing anything to publicise...

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