52% Of Trump Supporters Can’t Find America On A Map
When it was pointed out to them exactly where America lay on the map, many of them seemed disappointed that it wasn’t the whole of North America from Mexico upwards.
Trump Replaces White House With Blimp
President Donald Trump took to the skies over Washington today in a giant, orange blimp.
The President is believed to have made the decision...
Irishman confused by difference between abortions and prosecuting women
An Irish fella is presently proving himself more full of gas than a tinker's hound by spouting no end of shite on the twitters....
KKK David Duke polling better with black voters than Donald Trump
In news that feels like it should be satire but is in fact oddly true, Dr David Duke, the Grand Wizard of The Ku...
Gigantic orange adult toddler in misogyny veteran sacrifice spat
Donald 'The Toddler' Trump was said to be upset this morning after the hashtag DumbDonald began trending on Twitter.
The Toddler is running for the...
Donald Trump arrives in Germany and says ‘Ich bin ein Binliner’ Berlin agrees
President Donald Trump landed in Germany Sunday morning to kick off the first leg of his 12-day trip to Europe.
Trump held a surprise press...
Only 350 High School Shootings left until Christmas
Children across the United States of America were very excited to learn this morning that it's now officially only 350 school shootings until Christmas.
With...
Coal prices spike on news of Katy Hopkins’ incineration
International coal prices have jumped to $120 a tonne, their highest since 2011, following news that a British court has sentenced Daily Mail columnist...
Pakistani woman sentenced to death for insulting Harry Potter
A woman in Pakistan has been sentenced to death for insulting the fictional character, Harry Potter.
The woman's lawyer told us, "This woman deeply insulted Harry Potter...
Absolute arsehole Winnie Mandela dies aged 81
An absolute arsehole has died in South Africa aged 81.
Outrage as Trump BBQ ruins White House lawn
White House officials were said to be furious today after Trump supporters burned a cross on the South Lawn last night.
The BBQ, which was...
Haiti sends aid to holidaymakers whose trip to Disneyworld was cancelled
Heartwarming news reaching us from Haiti today after they'd heard that Amanda Bangor and her family from Norden had their trip to Disneyland cancelled because of...
Trump credited with restoring American faith in Bush
Donald Trump has been given credit for restoring America's faith in Bush.
One Bush expert told us, "10 years ago American faith in Bush was...
Emperor Trump appoints frog-faced racist as UK ambassador to US
In a bold show of complete disregard for the sovereignty of British Parliament, his highness emperor Trump has appointed a well-known and unelected frog-faced...
Sergei Lavrov Trump’s ‘Top Choice’ for new FBI Director
Sources within the Trump administration have downplayed rumours that Russian diplomat Sergei Lavrov is in the running to become the next Director of the...
Halloween pumpkin mistaken for President Trump
The embarrassing incident occurred after Ivanka left the pumpkin in the Oval Office. A meeting of President Trump’s closest advisors failed to realise that...
