Sean Spicer

Whitehouse denies denying things that were denied last week

7
The Whitehouse press corps was today left totally baffled by the latest denial issued by a Whitehouse press spokesperson. The denial was in response to...
FBI

There was nothing to tip us off about that bloke who bought 33 guns...

1
The FBI have reiterated that there were absolutely no clues that a bloke who bought thirty three semi-automatic rifles in one year might have...
Man holding a gun

Mass shootings ‘fact of life’ says only country where mass shootings happen

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Ralph H. Ick, head of the Texas branch of the NRA made the shocking statement yesterday after seven children were slain and three were...
Ancient text

“The Cheesemakers?”

0
Archaeologists near Jerusalem have discovered what is believed to be a missing page from the Old Testament. If genuine it belongs at the beginning of...

Trump Perfected Curtsy For Saudi King Salman

Donald Trump's impeachment looked ever more certain in the last few days after images were released of him curtsying before King Salman of Saudi...

US police to swear allegiance directly to Trump and be called the Orange Shirts

1
In a bold new democracy-busting move, Emperor Trump has decreed the police will now swear an oath of allegiance directly to the person of...

Judge increases Shkreli’s prison sentence by 5000%

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Disappointed with the complete undervaluing of his sentence, disgraced former Hedge Fund Manager Martin Shkreli has insisted his prison sentence up by 5000% up...

All guns to be armed with guns

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In the wake of the latest mass shooting of innocent people to take place on U.S. soil, the National Rifle Association has issued a...
angry man

Swearing Increasing Exponentially Since Trump’s Inauguration

4
Use of swear words has increased dramatically since Donald Trump’s inauguration, a study has shown. Since the 20th of January, the average number of swear...

End of the World Predicted this month. For the Third Time

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End of the World Predicted this month. For the Third Time. This time conspiracy theorists have predicted that, on 23 September, there will be a...
Hurricane

State of emergency declared as Hurricane Dorian heads towards rich white people

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Category 4 hurricane 'Dorian' has caused devastation throughout the Bahamas this week. The hurricane has broken previous records of longest sustained category 5 status and...
Theresa May

Theresa May admits using ‘BREXOMATHICS’ to calculate number of overstaying foreign students

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"It's so simple, you take a real number and keep doubling it until everyone's eyes light up," explained May pointing out that it worked...

ISIS withdraw from Iraq after Blair’s return to politics announcement

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Tony Blair yesterday announced that he intended to fill a massive hole and that after that he'd return to British politics. In an interview he...

Anyone actively calling for a war to be automatically drafted to the front line

Anybody saying there should be a war may be required to put their money where their mouth is in future.  In a new bid to...

Absolute arsehole Winnie Mandela dies aged 81

An absolute arsehole has died in South Africa aged 81.

Emperor Trump appoints frog-faced racist as UK ambassador to US

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In a bold show of complete disregard for the sovereignty of British Parliament, his highness emperor Trump has appointed a well-known and unelected frog-faced...

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