US police to swear allegiance directly to Trump and be called the Orange Shirts
In a bold new democracy-busting move, Emperor Trump has decreed the police will now swear an oath of allegiance directly to the person of...
President Trump to ‘grab May by the pussy’
Donald Trump may touch the UK prime minister's vagina in their first private meeting, the president has tweeted.
The straw-haired misogynist wrote, "Excited to meet...
I don’t make mistakes says man who accidentally got himself elected President
A giant orange man child who accidentally got himself elected President of the United States during a publicity stunt for his gaudy golf course business announced live on television that he doesn't make mistakes, immediately before making a mistake.
We’re going to build a wall and America is going to pay for it...
There was outrage across the United States this afternoon after the President of Mexico said "fuck this shit" and vowed to close the border...
Russia and China back UN call for Kim Jong Un to be sent to...
The UN has finally received the backing of both Mummy and Daddy as Russia and China backed the call for serious punishment to be...
DUP ask Merkel for one billion Euros to give her their support in Bundestag
News broke this morning that the Northern Ireland political party, the DUP, has demanded one billion euros from Angela Merkel in order to support...
New EU regulations will require all new houses to have Toulouse
Flush from the success of Brexit, the EU Commission has been swift to demonstrate what the future looks like without a good hard Brit. ...
Alcoholics Anonymous of America add 13th Step – Don’t Fucking Bother
After 63 years of success Alcoholics Anonymous of America have added a 13th Step to their eponymous programme - Step 13: Don't Fucking Bother.
The...
Straya, Blue Skies and Fascists
As the Federal Government makes further progress towards a Fascist state, it’s been a busy day in Australian politics.
Judge increases Shkreli’s prison sentence by 5000%
Disappointed with the complete undervaluing of his sentence, disgraced former Hedge Fund Manager Martin Shkreli has insisted his prison sentence up by 5000% up...
Trump aide sacked after misspelt memo advised him to secure the “rapist vote”
It emerged that a senior aide has been dismissed after a spelling mistake caused a schism in Presidential campaign.
Crooked Hilary Exposed Again
In the wake of the ongoing email scandal, an intrepid Rochdale Herald researcher, Douglas, has uncovered a series of other scandals that the...
Ernst Stavro Blofeld a serious contender for Head of FBI
The White House has announced this morning that Blofeld is on the shortlist for the next head of the FBI following Comey's sacking yesterday.
Get your hands out of Ivanka’s knickers, White House orders media
White House press secretary Sean "Ginger" Spicer has issued an ultimatum to the US media in the wake of the growing row over the...
Breaking: The person trespassing on the White House has been revealed as Nigel Farage
A spokesperson for White House Security has just confirmed that the intruder apprehended today was Nigel Farage.
Mr. Farage was promptly arrested after scaling the...
Despot of country full of gullible starving peasants about to declare war on North...
The bilge tanks of mainstream media are overflowing today with irrepressible joy and mental sewerage at the prospect of wannabe despot Donald Trump declaring...
