NEWSFLASH – Trump withdraws from Election

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On the eve of the US Presidential Election Donald Trump has dramatically pulled out of the running. Don Trump, 58 and owner of Streamline Taxis...
Alex Jones

Alex Jones discusses the Trump presidency

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Good evening. Today I am speaking to Radio host and Bacofoil and batshit salesman, Alex Jones.  Good afternoon, Alex. How are you feeling after Trump's rather...

Trump tells California, Cut down all the trees to prevent future forest fires

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POTATUS has announced that if all the trees in California were cut down then there would be no forest fires. POTATUS got the idea after...
ISIS

ISIS narrowly beats Halloween and Presidential election in annual scary competition

This year's annual scary competition is still a 3 horsemen of the apocalypse race in it's closing stages.

Conspiracy theorists concerned nobody might be in charge after all

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American conspiracy theorists heads are exploding at an alarming rate as the two main presidential candidates get more and more terrible. "Up until yesterday I was...

Facebook Year in Review video reinforces depressed lonely man’s belief that his friendless existence...

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Retired upholsterer, Brian Mould, was thrilled to see a bespoke video of his 2016 appear on his Facebook newsfeed earlier this week. Filled with anticipation...
Theresa may Trump

Racist right wing nut-job to meet racist right wing nut-job at Downing Street on...

A racist right wing whack-job will meet a racist right wing nut-job when he visits the UK for bilateral talks on July 13th, Downing...

J K Rowling denies seven figure sum to write ‘President Trump and the White...

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Other proposed titles in the series are, ‘Vladimir Putting and the Half Brained President’, ‘Donnie Trump and the Gob of Fire and Fury’, ‘President Trump and the Prisoner of Asshat’, ‘Donald Trump and the Magic Revolving Door of Power’ and ‘Donald in the Competition to be Crazier than North Korea’.

Election Was Rigged Claims Trump – Recount Demanded

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Donald Trump has sensationally claimed that the 2016 US Presidential Election was rigged and he is demanding a recount.

Susan Boyle to sing Dead Kennedys ‘Too Drunk To F*ck’ at Trump Inauguration

In a last ditch attempt to find a "celebrity" to perform at Trump's Inauguration Scottish songstress and Britain's Got Talent sensation Susan Boyle (aka...
Pope and Trump

Pope Officiates At Funeral For US Democracy

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There was not a dry eye in the house today as Donald Trump, and the special ladies in his life, attended the funeral for...
Donald Genius Trump

Fat bottomed ape learns to mimic human sounds

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Washington DC - A seventy year primitive primate that can mimic human words such as hello, bigly, braggadocios, and covfefe is thought to be...
Trump on Warship

He knew what he signed up for, says dickhead who doesn’t know what he...

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Proving once and for all that sometimes the best thing to say is nothing, Donald Trump told the widow of a grieving soldier that...

Trump and Steve Bannon to wrestle naked for alt-right leadership

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It has emerged that President Donald Trump and Breitbart Chief Steve Bannon have apparently arranged to wrestle naked on the White House South Lawn...

Putin starts worrying that he might be a dick

Russian President Vladimir Putin has reportedly started worrying that he might actually be a bit of a dick. Sources close to Putin have revealed that...

Bad guys with guns get more practice complain good guys with guns

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Good guys with guns in America went on the record this morning to complain they're unfairly getting a bad reputation after failing to prevent the 2078th successive mass shooting since 2,000.

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