Julian Assange Loses Porn Privileges
Long term squatter julian Assange has lost his internet porn privileges at the Ecuadorian Embassy, where he lives in a cupboard, The Rochdale Herald...
Trump marks 50 years since Abraham Lincoln walked on Mars
Donald Trump has today given a speech suggesting that it's the 50th anniversary of Abraham Lincoln walking on Mars.
A spokesman for POTATUS said,...
Ceuta is nothing like Gibraltar, King Felipe of Spain tells UK without hint of...
The Spanish King called for a deal on the status of Gibraltar yesterday. King Felipe VI clarified in no uncertain terms that:
“The status of...
Vladimir Putin wins Russian Presidential election with 110% of the vote
Vladimir Putin will lead Russia for another six year terms after securing victory in the Russian "election" today.
With almost all of the ballots counted...
Syrian children launch crowdfunding campaign to help those affected by KFC crisis
Children from the Syrian city of Damascus have launched a campaign to help those affected by the ongoing KFC chicken shortage.
In a video posted...
Russia accuse Boris of hysterical Russophobia
Russia has responded to Boris Johnson's accusations of war crimes by counter-accusing the British government and Boris in particular of 'Russophobia.'
Despite what one may...
FBI reveals to Trump evidence of a golf course at Chernobyl
The FBI have allegedly revealed the location of a secret golf course in Chernobyl to Donald Trump today.
One FBI spokesman said, "POTATUS was on...
Singing Ringing Tree to be felled for post-Brexit firewood
Britain's exit from the European Union is set to spell the end for some of the country's best loved children's TV programmes, it was...
Gays seen boarding ark two by two in Texas saying ‘our work here is...
An ark has been spotted in Texas picking up a group of homosexuals who caused all the flooding there.
The findings have come as a...
You lot all look the same to me, Jeremy Hunt tells wife and Chinese...
The UK's new foreign secretary Jeremy Hunt admitted yesterday that he can't tell his wife apart from the Chinese Foreign Minister because they both...
Pakistani woman sentenced to death for insulting Harry Potter
A woman in Pakistan has been sentenced to death for insulting the fictional character, Harry Potter.
The woman's lawyer told us, "This woman deeply insulted Harry Potter...
ISIL in talks with Amazon over drone deliveries deal
An email has surfaced, from an anonymous source claiming to be from within Amazon, which suggests that the international distribution leviathan is in secret...
White House CCTV confirms Obama listening to Trump in Oval Office
Secret Service agents are reviewing White House CCTV footage this morning which Donald Trump believes show Obama inside the White House.
The footage, captured in...
Statue Of Liberty To Be Deported
America's creepiest uncle, State Department Obergruppenführer Steve 'Steve-O' Bannon confirmed today that steps were being taken to deport 'dangerous subversive' the Statue of Liberty.
"Ms...
Russia urges foreign powers not to meddle in their U.K. elections
The Russian Government has urged all nations to refrain from interfering in its UK elections.
A spokesman told us, "We are very worried about other...
Kennedy files reveal he is definitely dead
The publication of nearly 3,000 previously classified files relating to the assassination of John F Kennedy in 1963 reveals that the former US President...
