Lord Lucan, Pol Pot, Martin Borman ,Abu Bakr al-Baghdadi and Boko Haram emerge from...
An entire top shelf of global mass murderers have signalled they plan to emerge from hiding following the announcement by US president Donald trump...
President Trump wins golf tournament with hole in one on final difficult windmill
Donald Trump has begun his seventeen day summer vacation on a high after winning an international competition at his private golf course in New...
Canada recognises the Alamo as capital of Mexico
Donald Trump has given a calm and measured response to news that Canada intends to move it's Mexican embassy to the Alamo.
Just kidding. Trump...
Australia in early fireworks embarrassment
We have heard news that fireworks have been sighted a full 12 hours before new year in Syndney Harbour, Australia.
The fireworks that were reported to...
U.S. prepares for Steve Bannon’s execution
Following an interview in which Steve Bannon compared himself to Tudor-era royal adviser Thomas Cromwell, America is making hasty preparations for the execution of Donald...
Children excited it’s only three US defence secretaries until Christmas
Children all across America are giddy with excitement that it is now officially only three US defence secretaries until Christmas morning.
The news comes after...
US celebrates after number of days so far this year overtakes number of mass...
Americans across America are celebrating the fact that for the first time since the invention of calendars there have been more days in the...
RSPCA desperately seeking forever homes for 45 bunnies rescued from ‘Bunny Farm’ in California
A RSPCA spokesman in Nantwich is urgently looking for 45 'new residents rescued from what he described as 'the biggest bunny farm they had...
Modern Day Presidential latest euphemism for complete and utter numpty, say linguists
As Humpty Dumpty said, "When I use a word, it means whatever I want it to mean." Clearly in a world of self-reductible horseshit,...
France admits the French Language was created to avoid speaking to other Countries
It has been rumored for years. Now it is official, France finally stops the lies. Confesses they only created the French language to avoid...
Self-proclaimed ‘bestest dealmaker’ fails to do deal with Bruce Springsteen cover band
Idiots across America who voted for Trump because he told them he was really good at doing deals are surprised by the news he hasn't been able to do a deal with a Bruce Springsteen tribute band.
Shock as a US Police Department goes a whole day without shooting somebody
There was consternation across the US yesterday after the police department in Bumshart Nebrahoma went a whole day without shooting an unarmed black civilian.
Heavily...
The ‘J’ is for Genius, confirms Donald J Trump
Washington - The actual real life President of the United States of America Donald J Trump has cleared up speculation over the weekend about...
US Government admits covering up red alert over imminent asteroid impact
Scientists and Government sources have confirmed that the giant asteroid, 2016-FI is on course to strike the Northern Hemisphere after initial uncertainty about it's...
Tim Nice But Dim appointed UK Ambassador to the EU
In a surprise move Theresa May has appointed Tim Nice But Dim UK Amabassador to the EU.
Ethnic cleanliness next to Godliness according to the DUP
The DUP were apparently acknowledging today the new opportunities opening up to them, with some pleasure.
DUP spokesmuppet Seamus Allways said "This is orr moment...
