Trump

Massive weapon condemns massive weapon’s massive weapon test

5
A massive weapon took to social media this morning to condemn the massive weapon test of another massive weapon. It's unclear at this point who...

Shit closer to hitting fan than yesterday

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Analysts and experts of faecal matters are saying that the shit, that was yesterday quite close to the fan, is now a bit closer...
Donald Trump

Trump says he believes Melania’s explanation that she didn’t only marry him for his...

0
Donald Trump has said that he believes that Melania Trump married him for his rugged good looks, sublime conversation and attentive tenderness as a...
Trump White House

Alphabet distances itself from Trump

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Following the 45th POTUS' increasingly alarming and inaccurate claims, statements and threats, it seems that one particular organisation has had enough. The Alphabet released a...

Russian spies were visiting world famous Dutch ski resorts

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A group of alleged Russian spies who were apprehended in Holland have said they were there learning to ski on the world famous Dutch...
Obi Wan Kenobi

‘What happened on Alderaan was terrible but I condemn the violence done by all...

7
Obi Wan Kenobi, under pressure from Yoda and other members of the ghost Jedi Council to condemn the destruction of Alderaan, has issued a...

Leaked memo from US Embassy in London written in Crayon

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There has been shock amongst diplomatic circles this morning after a leaked memo written in crayon from the US Ambassador in London revealed that...

Churchill, Bill Clinton, Castro estates involved in Cuban cigar crisis

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The demise of Castro has triggered a dangerous standoff between East and West superpowers.  Upon the news of the death of Castro shares in antique...
Scaramucci

I only just learned how to spell Scaramucci and he’s been fucking fired, complains...

18
A highly paid and widely syndicated satirist has complained about the firing of the White House Head of Communications Antony Scarymuchly, as he’s only...
Sergei Lavrov

Kremlin accuse American spooks of lying to Trump

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The Kremlin has accused America's security services of treasonous behaviour after Lavrov's love in with Trump. A spokesman for the Kremlin released the following warning to...
White House Christmas

Children excited it’s only three US defence secretaries until Christmas

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Children all across America are giddy with excitement that it is now officially only three US defence secretaries until Christmas morning. The news comes after...
Trump Flag

Trump to introduce Hunger Games-style immigration policy

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The matter of immigration has often been a contentious issue within politics, particularly American politics of late. During the campaign trail, Donald Trump promised...

North Korea fury after Trump sends dick pic following Kim Kardashian meeting

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North Korean media has reacted angrily after Donald Trump allegedly sent Kim Jong Un a photo of his genitalia. Spokesman for North Korea, Ban-Ki-Han-Ki said,...

Condoms are a commie liberal plot to give everybody AIDS according to Trump VP

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Revelations of comments  made by Donald Trump's running mate, the 'Caucasian Executioner of Indiana', Mike Pence show that Governor Pence might not know how...
Francis Underwood

Fictional President held to higher standard than actual President

1
Fictional President of the United States Francis Underwood has been obliged to step down this week following allegations of historical sexual harassment. Whilst his Presidency...

Pathetic snowflake cries over claim less guests at his party than other

1
Little spoilt toddler Donald again could be heard from across Washington today, as he wailed and screamed about other children having more guests at...

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