White House confirms all its press staff do coke

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The White House has admitted today that all its press staff do coke. The admission comes after the latest mouthpiece for President Trump, Mr Scaramucci,...
hand written notes

Trump apologises for misreading email.

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President Donald J. Trump has apologised for misreading an email which has led to some bizarre policy announcements in the last few days. The President was...

Denmark offers to buy America from Russia

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Mette Frederiksen, the Prime Minister of Denmark has reportedly expressed an interest in buying the Russian controlled territory of the United States of America. Rich...
Donald Trump

People hoping absolute power will moderate narcissistic bully

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Political analysts are speculating that now Donald Trump is leader of the free world his personality will metamorphose into that of a wise leader...

Donald Trump’s penis is largest the world has ever seen says Donald Trump

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Donald Trump has asked his propaganda secretary, Sean Spicer, to assure The White House press corps that President Trump's penis is "the largest penis in the history of penises. Period!"

Trump marks 50 years since Abraham Lincoln walked on Mars

Donald Trump has today given a speech suggesting that it's the 50th anniversary of Abraham Lincoln walking on Mars. A spokesman for POTATUS said,...
Bob Geldof

Sanctimonious tax avoiding ex-pat hands back key to city he doesn’t live in for...

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London-dwelling sanctimonious tax-avoider Bob Geldof has said he will return his Freedom of the City of Dublin. Geldof, a remarkably rich registered non-dom who pays...
Hot dog

G20 Crisis as Trump eats hot dogs in Hamburg.

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President Donald Trump caused outrage in Hamburg, Germany today, eating hot dogs and apple pie and drinking root beer all flown in with him...
Trump Atos

Atos and DWP pronounce Trump unfit for work

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A physical and mental health Atos assessment on US President, Donald J Trump, has conclusively found that he is unfit for work, the DWP...

Mary forced to give birth on stable floor after health insurance refuses to cover...

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A woman that claims she's about to give birth to the son of God has told the Herald, about how she is being forced...
Trump Golf

Scientists confirm Donald Trump’s ego and waistline are inflating at an alarming rate

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Scientists have today confirmed that, President of the United States, Donald Trump is inflating at an alarming rate. On his Inauguration Day on 20th...

National security at stake after Donald Trump gets stuck in revolving door

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The removal from office of Anthony "You're fired!" Scaramucci and Reince "You're fired too!" Priebus have prompted many White House insiders to consider the...

All guns to be armed with guns

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In the wake of the latest mass shooting of innocent people to take place on U.S. soil, the National Rifle Association has issued a...
Dictionary entry for word "definition"

Trump defuses “alt facts” row by appointing Humpty Dumpty as Secretary of State for...

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US President Donald Trump today moved to defuse the smouldering row over the 'alternative facts' presented by his media counsellor Kellyanne Conway, by appointing fictional Alice-Through-the-Looking-Glass...

Trump University launches alternative science course

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Donald Trump has announced the launch of a new science course that will be taught at Trump University from September. The course will feature subject matter...

South African Scientist Discovers Free Non-Polluting Energy Source

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Imagine the scenario: you are in a pub, when a local starts spouting racist nonsense. You have an overwhelming desire to stand up and...

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