Trump marks 50 years since Abraham Lincoln walked on Mars
Donald Trump has today given a speech suggesting that it's the 50th anniversary of Abraham Lincoln walking on Mars.
A spokesman for POTATUS said,...
Scandinavian ‘Too Drunk To Stand’ Following Drunk-Sleighing Arrest
Rochdale magistrates heard how a visitor from Lapland, Mr Nicholas Saint (1,747) created havoc in Rochdale with his erratic control over his team of excitable reindeer pulling a bright red sleigh.
‘News media so fake’ says perma-tanned, toupee-wearing septuagenarian
The world's favourite orange leader has been ranting about his pet hate once again. The issue of so-called “Fake news” is now well within...
Oh,For f*ck’s Sake Most Commonly Used Phrase Of 2016
Oh, for fuck’s sake said everyone this morning, following reports of more people dying at the hands of total arseholes.
After news broke of the...
UKIP reveal solution to ‘Irish Problem’
Paul Nuttall revealed UKIP's Irish policy this afternoon and raised more hair than usual.
"It's clear Ireland is a problem as the United Kingdom hurtles...
Not enough guns in America according to experts
In the aftermath of the shocking shooting of children and teachers in a Florida High School, Americans have been quick to point out there...
Theresa May summons devil to discuss Syria
The prime minister has summoned the devil to discuss the government's response to a suspected chemical weapons attack in Syria.
They are expected to discuss...
Kim Jong-un claims North Korea ‘now a Hurricane Power’ after successful Atlantic test
North Korean leader Kim Jong-un praised the "perfect success" of the country's third and largest Hurricane test and urged further weather development.
According to state...
Macron makes mince meat of May
Emmanuel Macron has a well deserved reputation as a man who knows what an older lady likes.
Now it seems he's out to shag Brexit...
Iain Duncan Smith appointed to North Korean Cabinet
Within the last hour, the North Korean Central News Agency has confirmed the appointment of Iain Duncan Smith as its new ‘Secretary for the...
After being pussy whipped by North Korea, Trump turns his attention to Afganyst Agfhanist...
Having been pussy-whipped by North Korea in the Pacific, US president Donald Trump has signalled his readiness to turn his military attention to Afganyst...
Former military cadet fulfils lifelong ambition to visit Vietnam despite agonisingly debilitating bonespurs
A former military cadet has finally fulfilled his dream to visit Vietnam despite suffering from debilitating bonespurs.
The man, now in his seventies, is said...
Trump a performance artist, claims Attorney
As the case against Trump supporter and white nationalist butt-nugget Matthew Heimbach heats up, his lawyer has said that Trump may well be called...
US celebrates after number of days so far this year overtakes number of mass...
Americans across America are celebrating the fact that for the first time since the invention of calendars there have been more days in the...
Man who works at institution he’s opposed to because he’s paid to says he...
Nigel Farage, who said a month ago that he wouldn't pledge support for Trump, has appeared at a Trump rally to pledge support for...
Trump nothing like Hitler. Hitler wasn’t fat and bald say experts
Historian's have said that Donald Trump is nothing like Hitler as Hitler wasn't fat and bald.
Stan Still said, "A lot of people have been...
