Tim Nice But Dim appointed UK Ambassador to the EU
In a surprise move Theresa May has appointed Tim Nice But Dim UK Amabassador to the EU.
The Middle East starts packing as Blair hints at return to politics
The Oxford English definition of irony, former Middle East Peace Envoy, Tony Blair, suggested a political return may be on the cards in a...
Terrifying clown in next Stephen King film to be perma-tanned and have a combover
Stephen King took to twitter today to reveal a juicy nugget regarding his next movie project, ’Idiot’, a sequel to ‘It’, will feature a...
Seriously?
I mean, just....Fuck, Fuck Fuck Fuck Fuck Fuck Fuck Fuck Fuck Fuck Fuck.
A spokesman for minorities everywhere said; "Fuck Fuck Fuck Fuck Fuck Fuck...
Idiot dies in Karmic Avalanche
An idiot died in an avalanche of Karma in the town of Teruel in Aragon, Spain, yesterday.
Victor Barrio (29), having spent the last 9...
Trump asks to buy Greenland after hearing it is actually white
President Trump has indicated his strong interest in buying Greenland from the Danish. The move has shocked US analysts as it comes just weeks...
Trump to celebrate Father’s Day by bathing in the tears of abducted child immigrants
US President Donald Trump is to celebrate his second Father's Day in the White House by having a bath filled with the tears of...
World shocked Thailand torturing political prisoners
The world was rocked to the core today after an Amnesty International report revealed that Thailand's military junta, otherwise known as "the government", tortures...
Scandal as Trump attempts to circumvent physical laws
In his bid to become master of the universe, Donald Trump has postulated a new set of axioms about the physical universe as we...
Trump: tinfoil a good defence against mind control rays
President-elect Donald J Trump has announced a groundbreaking and cutting edge technology to combat the growing menace of conspiracies facing the US.
He is well...
UKIP leader calls for Theresa May to resign
UKIP's leader, Vladimir Putin has called on Theresa May to call a General Election to ensure a Government is elected that will push Brexit...
Trump barred from White House toilets
President Donald Trump has been the first victim of his cancellation of orders compelling universities and other institutions to respect personal identity.
Although rescinding the orders was...
EU designates British cockwombles “endangered species”
Indigenous British cockwombles have been given official European Union "endangered species" designation as their numbers have plummeted due to loss of habitat to invasive...
Santa to be denied entry to U.K. under proposed points system
Santa is to be denied entry to the UK under the new points based immigration system.
A Home Office spokesman told us, "The system...
So Mr Farage, what first attracted you to the white supremacist sympathising billionaire Donald...
That was the question that Nigel Farage was asked by TV interviewer Mrs Morton and Mr Farage MP (just kidding) obliged like never before.
Mr...
Home Office To Issue Migrants With Wearable Documentation
EU nationals currently living in the UK will require documents confirming their right to remain in the country post-Brexit, the Home Office has announced.
Speaking...
