Pope meets Bono to demand he removes U2’s albums from his iTunes account
Pope Francis is to have a private audience with Bono to demand to know how to delete U2's latest album from his iTunes library.
According...
Britain plans Brexit trade deal ‘perverts for peace’
Following the embarrassment of the spectacular failure of a hideously expensive program to rehabilitate sex offenders, Ministry of Justice officials are arranging study visits...
Revealed! What ‘Brexit’ means.
After months of denying that 'Brexit' could be defined in terms of anything other than being 'Brexit', the Government has finally announced what, in...
Bravery of white lives matter protesters saluted after US march
I was born white and as such I face discrimination on a daily basis. Only the other day I was told I couldn't have a job in Starbucks because I have a swastika tattoo on my face. Apparently it may offend customers. It's because I'm white.
Reality TV to blame for increase in number of f*cknuggets being elected president, say...
Reality TV is to blame for the number of imbeciles and ding-a-lings who are being elected president of the United States, video games have...
Dyson vacuum cleaners issue blanket denial of Trump wiretap allegations
UK based vacuum cleaner and household electronics company Dyson has no involvement whatsoever in spying on US President Donald Trump, sources close to the...
Trump and Steve Bannon to wrestle naked for alt-right leadership
It has emerged that President Donald Trump and Breitbart Chief Steve Bannon have apparently arranged to wrestle naked on the White House South Lawn...
We did have a Kermit at protest insist violent alt-left anti-Nazi protestors
The anti-Nazi protestors who were in Charlottesville over the weekend have responded furiously to Donald Trump's remarks this morning releasing a statement which read.
"We...
British Tomahawks Launched As Part Of U.S. Strike Hit Aledo
It has been revealed that as part of Donald Trump's assault on Syria, two British missiles were launched. These missiles were said to be...
Trump says IKEA table he ordered arrived ‘pre-blown up’
President Donald J Trump is convinced that ‘something bigly bad’ has gone down in Sweden, after a dining table he ordered from IKEA arrived...
Catalonia makes a break for Eurovision glory
Catalonia today announced a bold step to break out on their own and go for it alone.
Not since the 11th century has there...
Audi driver becomes first in space after tailgating Tesla into orbit
A Rochdale man has become the first Rochdale resident to go into space.
Ted Skeat, 48 achieved the feat by tailgating a Tesla car on...
England ready for Adelaide Ashes Test
Ahead of the second Ashes Test which has just started in Adelaide, England captain Joe Root sought to defuse the simmering tension between the...
Trump Train derailed by Reddit
Would-be U.S.President and serial bigot, Donald Trump awoke this morning to find his dreams of becoming the most powerful man on the planet in...
South African Scientist Discovers Free Non-Polluting Energy Source
Imagine the scenario: you are in a pub, when a local starts spouting racist nonsense. You have an overwhelming desire to stand up and...
Sinn Fein election observer confirms Venezuelan blowjobs, cocaine and elections are best in world
"I've had my share of blowjobs," confirms Jarry Odoms, mouthpiece of Sinn Fein. "But nobody does erections, I mean elections, like the Venezuelans. Now...




















































