We’re going to build a wall and America is going to pay for it...
There was outrage across the United States this afternoon after the President of Mexico said "fuck this shit" and vowed to close the border...
Belgian brewers threaten budget busting Brexit blackmail beer price boost
The world’s biggest beer company, Belgium based Anheuser-Busch Inbev warned Monday that the drop in value of Sterling in the wake of the UK's...
Aung San Suu Kyi surrenders Freedom of Dublin refusing to share the honour with...
Burmese leader Aung San Suu Kyi has given up her Freedom of the city of Dublin in protest at sharing the distinction with Bono,...
ISIS Second In Command Killed Again
The Daily Express has reported for the eighth time this month the death of so called Islamic State's second in command.
"He was killed by...
Gigantic orange adult toddler in misogyny veteran sacrifice spat
Donald 'The Toddler' Trump was said to be upset this morning after the hashtag DumbDonald began trending on Twitter.
The Toddler is running for the...
Terrifying clown in next Stephen King film to be perma-tanned and have a combover
Stephen King took to twitter today to reveal a juicy nugget regarding his next movie project, ’Idiot’, a sequel to ‘It’, will feature a...
Melania Trump was definitely not a prostitute says Melania Trump & Daily Mail
Slovenian "model" and "wife" of "human being" Donald Trump has lashed out at allegations in The Daily Mail that she was a sex worker...
Swiper named as Map Safety Ambassador by UN
The World Health Organization (WHO) has appointed Swiper, the thieving rodent, as a "map safety ambassador" to help tackle dangerous map use.
New WHO head...
Even Hitler didn’t treat his press secretary as badly as this says Sean Spicer
Sean Spicer has been explaining how badly he has been treated by Donald Trump. Speaking to an assembled press corps Mr Spicer said, "Even...
Condoms are a commie liberal plot to give everybody AIDS according to Trump VP
Revelations of comments made by Donald Trump's running mate, the 'Caucasian Executioner of Indiana', Mike Pence show that Governor Pence might not know how...
President Trump wins golf tournament with hole in one on final difficult windmill
Donald Trump has begun his seventeen day summer vacation on a high after winning an international competition at his private golf course in New...
Trump orders 700 billion pieces of LEGO
The President Elect reportedly ordered a vast amount of the interconnecting bricks earlier today.
LEGO CEO, Jørgen Vig Knudstorp, said; "Obviously we are thrilled to...
People attending reading of Hefner’s last will only doing so for the articles
Various well known public figures, and nobodies, have announced today they intend to be at the reading of Hugh Hefner’s last will and testament,...
Canada recognises the Alamo as capital of Mexico
Donald Trump has given a calm and measured response to news that Canada intends to move it's Mexican embassy to the Alamo.
Just kidding. Trump...
Britain to join new ‘European Federation’ after Brexit
EXCLUSIVE: With Britain poised to trigger Article 50 and put the wheels irreversibly in motion to finally leave the European Union, a leaked home office...
Germany devoid of German Christmas markets
German shoppers are disappointed that they have nowhere to buy lots of pointless tat in the run up to Christmas.
With every British town apparently...
