Comedians and satirists heaved a sigh of relief today as the prosecution of German comic Jan Böhmermann bubble Erdogan was dropped.

“Finally! Finally! Finally!” said Lancashire comedian and satirist Noah Mentit, “I’ve really missed mocking the mole-headed, arse-voiced sucker of Putin’s slimy cock! It’s ages since I have pointed out what a talentless, whining, Penfold-impersonating, weak, lily-livered bag of dog piss in a sausage skin the Turkish leader is.”

The German had been arrested under a vague and inappropriately used law, after Erdogan insisted that German battle boiler Angela Merkel stick the boot into German humour on the slimebag’s behalf.

Erdogan, whose name almost rhymes with cardigan and who is, coincidentally, about as competent and intelligent as a polyester ponce’s zip up pullover is most famous for being Putin’s bitch- although he did a fair act at nearly threatening to plan to think about standing up to the Russian top house elf after a mix up with a downed plane.

“It will be nice being able to call the shit-brained goat turd names again,” said comedy writer Fern Heagh, “lately we’ve had to resort calling Assad an olive face spunk wipe whilst looking at pictures of Erdogan It’s just not the same.”

These are the views of the people quoted and do not necessarily reflect the opinions of the Rochdale Herald who have happily sniped at the shag-witted, Kasimpasa cockwomble all along despite the silly attempt to silence critics and satirists.

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When the aeons of war left the gods dead and the universe decimated, a single duck rose from the ashes and stood for justice and freedom! It wasn't me, that duck, but we look quite bit alike.