2017 set to be hottest year on record
Experts in worldwide trends are predicting that 2017 will reach terminal levels of warmth by mid-June.
Professor Thorfin Nerfstretcherrsson, Head of Rochdale Community University's department...
Singing Ringing Tree to be felled for post-Brexit firewood
Britain's exit from the European Union is set to spell the end for some of the country's best loved children's TV programmes, it was...
Collective relief as travel ban doesn’t apply to celebrity Muslims
People across Facebook and the Twittersphere have taken a collective sigh of relief online today at the announcement Trump's travel ban from people travelling...
Australian Government launches plan to solve poverty by fining poor people
It has been revealed that secret meetings between the Prime Minister’s office and the Australian Federal Police has culminated in Operation Integrity, a scheme designed to push as many welfare recipients as possible, over the edge.
Theresa May admits using ‘BREXOMATHICS’ to calculate number of overstaying foreign students
"It's so simple, you take a real number and keep doubling it until everyone's eyes light up," explained May pointing out that it worked...
Nuclear war could be a massive boost for post Brexit British industry
A globally devastating nuclear war could prove to be a massive boost for post Brexit British industry, the UK's Secretary of State for International...
President Trump outlaws Donald Trump in white supremacists condemnation order
American race relations looked to be on the upturn today after President Donald Trump responded to the calls from Congress to condemn white supremacists...
All soldiers know what they are signing up for, that’s why I dodged the...
The West Wing has been forced to defend President Trump against malicious disinformation about his health and state of mind for months.
Allegations about his...
Bill Clinton Finally “Boss of Me” after Hillary Loss
Bill Clinton will finally get to be “the Boss of Me” after Hilary’s stunning loss in the US Presidential Election.
Spanish Prime Minister Mariano Rajoy wins European Thundercunt of the year award
The Spanish Prime Minister, Mariano Rajoy, was thrilled to learn last night that he has won the coveted European Thundercunt of the Year Award...
Trump supporter accidentally extinguishes trainers with own tears
"Wild" Bill Board, an American protesting at an advert for trainers was unable to get his shoes to burn today because the tears he...
Trump barred from White House toilets
President Donald Trump has been the first victim of his cancellation of orders compelling universities and other institutions to respect personal identity.
Although rescinding the orders was...
Dinosaurs deny existence of meteorite impact assessment
The dinosaurs today issued a statement in response to the challenge that they release their assessment on what would happen if the planet was...
Nigel Farage spends £1,000 on Ferrero Rocher ‘just in case’
Far right stringless Thunderbird puppet and multi-millionaire Dulwich educated ex-banker and man of the people Nigel Farage reportedly bought the middle class toffees straight...
Colombia fears double dip recession following death of Tara Palmer-Tomkinson
Government officials in Colombia have issued warnings of a double dip recession following the death of former "it girl" Tara Palmer-Tomkinson.
Former socialite and...
Trump restores American faith in Bush
Donald Trump has today been credited with restoring America's faith in Bush.
Dwayne Dwight of Alabama told the Herald "I was big into Bush in...
