Hilary Clinton’s emails confirm she would have already nuked North Korea
Further extracts reveal she had plans to construct “Wall Street on the Korean Peninsula” once the “dust and stuff has settled.”
50 migrants in canoes rescued off Kent coast forced to return to UK
A search and rescue operation has recovered 50 migrants off the Kent coast, the Home Office has said.
As spokesman said the Border Force had...
Theresa May summons devil to discuss Syria
The prime minister has summoned the devil to discuss the government's response to a suspected chemical weapons attack in Syria.
They are expected to discuss...
US celebrates Independence Day by ceding from Trump
Secret delegations from the 50 states of the United States of America have agreed a plan to avoid the impeachment of Donald Trump as...
English All Xenophobic Wankers – says Nicola Sturgeon without Hint of Irony
Nicola Sturgeon will today claim that “Godless English Imperial filth” are using Brexit as a “licence for xenophobia” and that the English “are secretly working to not be considered Wankers by absolutely everyone.”
DUP ask Merkel for one billion Euros to give her their support in Bundestag
News broke this morning that the Northern Ireland political party, the DUP, has demanded one billion euros from Angela Merkel in order to support...
Man-child chickens out of UK visit because people said mean things about him
Man-child and completely stable genius Donald Trump has reportedly cancelled his planned visit to the UK next month, according to the White House.
Trump was...
Gove calls for post-Brexit legalisation of cannibalism
Former Tory minister and leading Brexit campaigner Michael Gove has called on the government to slash EU regulations on cannibalism which he claims have...
Beekeeper stung to death after Danish Police force him to remove veil
Denmark was in shock today after a Danish beekeeper was stung to death in a tragic apiculture accident in Denmark.
The news comes just days...
Wright brothers blamed for rise in immigration
Criticism has been placed upon two American inventors for the dramatic rise in immigration, it has been confirmed.
Brothers Orville and Wilbur Wright, who are...
Not being liked by Vladimir Putin IS natural causes, confirms coroner
The UK police have admitted that perhaps they had jumped to a hasty conclusion after coroners concluded that a Russian businessman who strangled himself...
Donald Trump believes Nazi flags are adverts for fidget spinners
The President went on to suggest North Korea would be much safer if it followed the example of America and gave its citizens toys to play with and flags to wave like the patriots in Charlottesville yesterday.
Small bald man held for questioning over fairground disappearance of six children
Police have arrested a small bald wizard in connection with the unsolved disappearance of six children between the ages of 8 and 15 at...
Trump rally cancels book burning as supporters have no books to burn
Plans for an official book burning at a Trump rally in Bumshart California had to be scrapped yesterday after it emerged Trump supporters in...
Da Vinci’s ‘My Spunky Pantaloons’ sells for £45m
A previously unknown Leonardo da Vinci work "My Spunky Pantaloons" has been bought bought by Charles Saatchi for £45m.
The jizzy kecks will be...
ISIS claim extended warranty back on their washing machine
As the days pass and we see more and more terror attacks throughout the world, even though some aren't called that by the media...
