Susan Boyle to sing Dead Kennedys ‘Too Drunk To F*ck’ at Trump Inauguration
In a last ditch attempt to find a "celebrity" to perform at Trump's Inauguration Scottish songstress and Britain's Got Talent sensation Susan Boyle (aka...
Sponsorship deal agreed for new Emirates Notre Dame Cathedral
Following the destruction of popular prayer centre Notre Dame Cathedral, the Pope and President Macron jointly announced today that the gothic edifice would be...
Surprise and anger as Boris slips down the ‘worst diplomat ever chart’
There was consternation in Whitehall this morning as details emerged of several international diplomats who may in fact be much, much worse than Boris...
All guns to be armed with guns
In the wake of the latest mass shooting of innocent people to take place on U.S. soil, the National Rifle Association has issued a...
Russia and China back UN call for Kim Jong Un to be sent to...
The UN has finally received the backing of both Mummy and Daddy as Russia and China backed the call for serious punishment to be...
Pakistani woman sentenced to death for insulting Harry Potter
A woman in Pakistan has been sentenced to death for insulting the fictional character, Harry Potter.
The woman's lawyer told us, "This woman deeply insulted Harry Potter...
President Trump to ‘grab May by the pussy’
Donald Trump may touch the UK prime minister's vagina in their first private meeting, the president has tweeted.
The straw-haired misogynist wrote, "Excited to meet...
Trump’s presidency is ‘metaphorical, not literal’, says Spicer
Following unsubstantiated wiretapping allegations, president Trump’s press secretary, Sean Spicer, has argued that Trump is the metaphorical president and leader of the free world,...
Secret Service distance themselves from Trump’s Twitter account
The Secret Service, the department responsible for the security of the US President, has taken steps to distance themselves from Donald Trump's Twitter account.
After being pussy whipped by North Korea, Trump turns his attention to Afganyst Agfhanist...
Having been pussy-whipped by North Korea in the Pacific, US president Donald Trump has signalled his readiness to turn his military attention to Afganyst...
World shocked Thailand torturing political prisoners
The world was rocked to the core today after an Amnesty International report revealed that Thailand's military junta, otherwise known as "the government", tortures...
Trump’s American Dream – 25 Million to Leave the Country
Donald J. Trump unveiled a pledge on Thursday to create 25 million jobs over the next decade, but experts are arguing whether they strictly...
Current crop of World leaders worse than horse shagging Roman Emperor says Politics Professor
The world is not going to hell in a handcart, it's going in a speeding fucking Formula 1 Ferrari, according to Bésemecula Adiós, professor...
Trump tells CNN all future press conferences will be held in Saudi Embassy
POTATUS has announced that he will begin to give CNN press conferences in Saudi Embassies from now on.
The announcement comes as his administration complained...
Trump Train derailed by Reddit
Would-be U.S.President and serial bigot, Donald Trump awoke this morning to find his dreams of becoming the most powerful man on the planet in...
Yemenis Grateful That Britain Tidying Up Arms Deals
Ordinary Yemenis have taken a break from being killed by British and American bombs and weapons to thank the British Government for tightening up...
