I’m nothing like Steve Bannon – says Darth Vader

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Darth Vader took to Twitter today to distance himself from "that evil bastard" Steve Bannon after Bannon compared himself to Darth Vader, Thomas Cromwell, Dick Cheney and Satan.
American Police

Shock as a US Police Department goes a whole day without shooting somebody

There was consternation across the US yesterday after the police department in Bumshart Nebrahoma went a whole day without shooting an unarmed black civilian. Heavily...

British Tomahawks Launched As Part Of U.S. Strike Hit Aledo

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It has been revealed that as part of Donald Trump's assault on Syria, two British missiles were launched. These missiles were said to be...

New cold war looms as Trump aspires to make American prostitutes better than Russian...

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Concern that America is falling behind Russia in the pay-for-sex industry was allayed last night after President Donald J Trump announced a new ‘hooker...
RAF Typhoon

What could possibly go wrong, asks West

Western leaders have suggested that nothing could possibly go wrong by attacking Syria and this time will definitely be different to Iraq, Afghanistan and...

Obama quietly pleased his G20 riots were bigger than Trump’s

1
President Barack Obama, who was born in America, is said to be privately pleased the riots at G20 summits he attended were bigger than...
White House Nativity

Official White House Nativity scene to feature baby Jesus with Trump’s face

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The first image of the official White House nativity scene has been released, and it is already causing quite a stir. Every character in the...

Trump loses grip on reality, demands to be new Dr Who.

1
US President Donald Trump has called on the BBC to appoint him as the new Dr Who. In a series of tweets at 3am this...
Scaramucci

Trump Fan Can Go – Scaramucci sacked as new White House Communications Director –...

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He’s just a rich boy, didn’t give a fuck about anybody. Easy come, easy go, we guess. In disappointing news for fans of the White...

Chemical Attack was fake news says Asshat

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Bashir Assad has denied an attack on Khan Sheikhoun ever took place. “The attack was a fiction of the Western press,” said the Syrian leader...

Nuttall Claims Best Actor At Oscars

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Armenian born British Actor Constantine Felangi, better known by his stage name of Paul Nuttall, seized the coveted golden statue for Best Actor at...

Trump travel ban extends to Narnia

17
President Donald Trump last night signed an Executive Order adding Narnia to the travel ban and immediately excluding "followers of Aslan" from entering the...
Doctors

Donald Trump Is Disappearing Up His Own Arse

2
American scientists confirmed last night that US President, Donald Trump, is close to completely disappearing up his own arse. Professor Steven Sigmoid...
Donald Trump

White House admits Trump thought Korean War was fought in Star Trek

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The White House has apparently confirmed that POTATUS, Donald Trump, thought the Korean War was a war fought in the 1970's in Star Trek. The...
Garda

Emergency services called after Bob Geldof disappears up his own arse

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Two fire engines along with police and ambulance crews were called to the centre of Dublin after reports came in that a man had...
Trump Supporters

Trump discovers one weird trick to increasing attendance at his rallies

3
The White House has confirmed that Donald Trump has found a weird trick to increasing attendance at his rallies. During a speech given to Texas...

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