EU offers bribe of better UK weather if we remain

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The European Union, desperate for the UK to remain, have said that the proposed European Standard Weather system due to come into operation early...

Latin America overdoses on Irony as CIA complains Russia rigged US election

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Thousands of people are feared dead in Central and Latin America this week after literally laughing their heads off at the news that the...
Donald Trump

Half of Trump Supporters Gullible Obese Idiots and the other Half deplorable Racist A-holes...

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In the wake of the "scandal" surrounding Hillary Clinton's comments describing half of Trump supporters as a "basket of deplorables", The Rochdale Herald commissioned...
Executioner with axe

U.S. prepares for Steve Bannon’s execution

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Following an interview in which Steve Bannon compared himself to Tudor-era royal adviser Thomas Cromwell, America is making hasty preparations for the execution of Donald...

Trump appoints Rochdale Herald editor chief of intelligence

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More details have been emerging of the structure of the Trump elected new administration which is taking shape. Amid the circulating rumours of secret talks...
Donald Trump

If it wasn’t for these pesky bone spurs I’d have stopped shooter myself, says...

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Actual real-life President of the United States Donald Trump told a press conference earlier today that if it wasn't for the debilitating bone spurs...

Italians face criticism over construction. 

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The Italian government had come under severe criticism today for the standards of its building construction in the 1600's. This comes in the wake...

Virginia to ban books instead of burning them

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Parents from the Virginia School District have called for an immediate ban on all novels that contain the n-word.  To Kill a Mockingbird, Of Mice...

Monkey spanking decriminalised in Italy

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A man known only as Pietro L was charged with a public disorder offence earlier this year after being caught choking his chorizo on...

Trump Admits ‘I’d Actually Prefer Snowden To Farage’

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President-elect Donald Trump revealed today that although he had expressed a preference for Nigel Farage as UK ambassador to the USA, this was a...

Melania Trump is nothing like Eva Braun, she didn’t get tits out for money...

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Sean Spicer has put his foot in mouth again today by accidentally drawing comparisons between Hitler's wife, Eva Braun, and the First Lady, Melania...

Hartman on Trump – POTUS’s US Marine Corp induction transcript revealed

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Following the sad and untimely death of Gunnery Sergeant Hartman of the US Marine Corps, The Rochdale Herald has obtained an exclusive transcript of...
Trump Air Force one

Donald Trump arrives in Germany and says ‘Ich bin ein Binliner’ Berlin agrees

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President Donald Trump landed in Germany Sunday morning to kick off the first leg of his 12-day trip to Europe. Trump held a surprise press...
Putin Appraisal

Trump to meet Putin in Osaka for annual appraisal

The US and Russian Governments have confirmed that Donald Trump's annual appraisal will be held in Helsinki this year on the 28th of June. The...

Am I Mexican? Ask Trump voters after he says USA will pay for Wall

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The recently announced decision that the wall between Mexico and the USA will be built using American taxpayers money under a piece of legislation...

Canada and Mexico to build border walls if World Bank will fund a lid

The governments of Canada and Mexico reached an historic agreement today to build 50 foot tall walls along their borders with the US on the proviso that the World Bank lends them the money for a lid.

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