State media sources inside The Democratic People’s Republic of North Korea shouted the news this morning that Supreme Leader Kim Jong-un is to release a cover version of “Suicide is Painless”.
The original song was made famous by its use in the television hit M.A.S.H. and is still well loved to this day.
The new recording is being made in the hope of securing the theme song to the latest tensions with North Korea’s neighbours and numerous western powers.
“We don’t know how much more we can push the envelope until one of our missile experiments happens on a day when President Trump’s polling numbers are especially bad.” An insider working at Democratic People’s Republic of North Korean Music Studios stated.
“So we’ve got to make sure we nail the theme song now. We’re going to fling another dollar and dime store ballistic missile at the Sea of Japan shortly. We need to be ready. Sooner or later we’re going to screw one of these stunts up and somebody will do something unnecessarily unpleasant in response. And I’m not talking about dancing gangnam style. The whole world does that.”
It’s believed this cover recording, in an upbeat manner with aforesaid gangnam moves anyone can copy, will also ensure the morale of North Koreans remains strong throughout the coming weeks.
“There is the real possibility of another war on the Korean Peninsula. We don’t want some corrupt American taking the profits from the track chosen to play throughout it and just giving the money to a famine charity. We will need that cash to buy military equipment on the black market.”
The White House has not officially responded to the news yet.
It is believed President Trump is not best pleased though, as he is rumoured to be planning to cover the famous song himself as the theme tune for his time in office, and how that is working for American democratic institutions.