Study finds Manchester United fans have smallest penises
A new survey of football fans has discovered that Manchester United fans have significantly smaller penises than men who follow other teams.
"It's not just...
Norway’s female football team found in cocaine-fuelled strip club romp
Just hours after the Norwegian football association ruled that female footballer's pay must be brought in line with that of the men's, the entire...
Newcastle United fans looking forward to renewed access to match pies and beer
The Toon Army are rejoicing following the news that Sports Direct Entrepreneur Sweat Shop owner, Mike Ashley, is to sell the Magpies.
Realising that he...
Just £300,000 a month can feed a footballer for a whole week. Please give...
It can be harrowing, truly tragic to see, to see a young, athletic, talented man to have to survive in squalid conditions, living on...
Rooney: taking are cuntry bak
As the second half of the Manchester derby got underway, reports were coming in that Wayne Rooney had joined Britain First.
During the halftime team...
FIFA poppy row escalates
British football fans have been advised that if they object to FIFA's stance on its national teams wearing poppies on armistice day, then they...
FA launch tactical nuclear strike at semi-final of Women’s Euro 2017
The Football Association has long been implacably opposed to the rise of the women’s game. When it first got popular, the FA acted swiftly...
Foreigners with British citizenship MUST support England in the football, IT’S THE LAW
A Brazilian woman and her South African friend, who have both recently attained British citizenship, have been reported to the authorities after announcing that...
Moaning Mourinho In Lip Wobble Outburst
The future of games at Old Trafford are in doubt after Manchester United Manager Jose Mourinho demanded the removal of peas from referee's whistles...
God shows that he hates Cristiano Ronaldo and Argentina
God has revealed that he absolutely cannot stand Cristiano Ronaldo so he chose to favour Uruguay in yesterday's last 16 game.
God or, The Word...
England team reveal plan to completely disappoint everyone is going smoothly
Gareth Southgate has revealed that his plan to completely disappoint loads of English people is going exactly according to plan.
At a press conference Southgate...
New EU rules send shock waves through the terraces
New EU rules are set to send shock waves through the football terraces of the UK.
According to sources close to the FA, the...
EFL admits to buying its footballs from a petrol station on Rochdale
The English Football League has admitted buying its footballs from Denny’s Auto Diesel & Spar Mini-Mart on the Bury New Road in Rochdale.
The...
Police and HMRC raid Arsenal after silver polish claim on VAT return
More tax scandal has hit the Premier League last night after police swooped on the Arsenal stadium after they tried to claim the VAT...
Love Island Special – John Terry sacks Agent after he asked to join “that...
John Terry, the legendary back door man and occasional footballer, has sacked his Agent after finding himself trapped in a 1 year contract at...
Urinating Salford goalie earns whole side a place in England’s World Cup squad
Almost the entire Salford lineup have been selected as part of England’s squad for next year’s World Cup, it has emerged. All the English...
