The prima-donna XI, also known as the England National football team, have confirmed that they will take to the pitch against Germany this Friday, displaying the poppy.
However poppies up and down the country have been quick to distance themselves from the appropriation, insisting they will do everything within their flower to ensure it doesn’t damage their image.
The Rochdale Herald caught up with Spokespoppy Chukka Spanarintworks.
“These so called stars nowadays don’t understand our purpose!
“First it was the Far right turds who tried to steal us. I do think Paul and Jayda genuinely loved me, but in the end it was like being held to ransom by a sweaty pair of bollocks. You know they are part and parcel of the human race, but you’re still fucking disgusted by them. It’s been years since we’ve been worn anywhere with genuine pride.
“The apathy and ignorance seems to be spreading. I’ve been called all sorts of names in the past few weeks, shit Rose and poor man’s Orchid are just a couple.
“Even 2 of the 3 Lions told me to fuck off and called me a big daisy when we were in the sweat shop in Bangladesh getting sewn onto the kit. At least I’m only on here once a year you big pussies!
“When we arrived in the UK I was immediately accosted by several football agents who threatened to grind me down and sell me onto the streets.
“I feel ashamed to be associated with this bunch of numpties.”
The Rochdale Herald understands that a certain faction called the Poppy Rebel International Committee (known as the PRICs), may attempt to disrupt Friday’s match.
For the fans at Wembley, this may come as something of a relief.