Southern Rail offer Ryanair passengers bus replacement service for cancelled flights
Budget pay and pray airline, Ryanair have decided to cancel flights due to staff realising their pay and conditions could be significantly improved if...
Driverless Lorries to throw bottles of piss out of windows and murder hitch-hikers by...
In a dramatic step of unmanned vehicle technology, unmanned lorries will be distributing litter at motorway junctions and "disappear" young hitchhikers by the end...
Railway commuters told to save money by becoming drug addicts and losing their jobs
Railway commuters have been told that it will now cost at least one internal organ for them to travel to work this year. Costs...
Socialist FURIOUS that train strike made him late for business meeting
A self professed "die-hard Socialist" has admitted he's a bit pissed off with railway strikes.
Chris P. Bacon told us, "I support the right to...
Not getting to work with Southern Rail now 30% cheaper for 27 year olds
26 to 30 year old commuters were said to be jubilant today after Philip Hammond announced that from April 2018 it will be 30%...
ACEA: No U-Turn on Right-hand Drive Cars
The European Automobile Manufacturers Association (ACEA: Association des Constructeurs Européens d'Automobiles) looks set to cease the production of right-hand drive vehicles by mid-2019.
The decision...
Jo Swinson to present new series of ‘Great British Railway Journeys’
The BBC has announced that Jo Swinson will replace Michael Portillo as host of the show, in much the same way as a smug...
It’s the will of the people – Jaguar Land Rover tells redundant employees
Jaguar Land Rover has told employees that by making them redundant they are carrying out the will of the British people.
Employee Bill Board told...
Getting from Leeds to Manchester 15 minutes quicker is top priority, says leader of...
The leader of a country full of hungry and homeless children has pledged to deploy all possible resources to shortening commuting times between Leeds...
Service improves slightly as RMT union goes on strike
Thousands of commuters are experiencing slightly better service than normal this morning as members of the RMT union have gone on strike.
"I knew my...
TERRIFYING new data reveals DANGER of reading Trump tweets about COMMERCIAL AIRLINES.
The latest figures covering deaths on American commercial airlines have shown a spectacular rise of OVER 1 MILLION per cent in 2017.
The...
Ryanair cancels all flights to Russia
Ryanair have announced today that it is cancelling all flights to Russia in 2018.
The move that will be affecting almost no Irish passengers between...
British Airways Awarded Southern Rail Franchise
British Airways CEO Alex Cruising has spoken at his joy over the airline being awarded the shambolic Southern Rail Service.
"We can do this." He...
Southern Rail passengers treated for nausea after train unexpectedly moves
Reports from south London this afternoon state there was a dramatic and disturbing experience for dozens of Southern passengers when their train actually moved.
The...
Petition to slow trains to Birmingham to walking pace hits 70 million signatures
A petition to slow down trains headed to Birmingham from London has hit almost 70 million signatures in under two hours today.
“Why on Earth...
Ryanair fires first salvo in airline price war by introducing “shrinkflation” routes
Budget Irish airline Ryanair has fired the first salvo in it's threatened "summer fares war", but instead of cutting fares as everyone expected, CEO...
