Ryanair to charge depressed passengers for emotional baggage
Ryanair have today announced that they will start charging depressed passengers for bringing emotional baggage with them onto their flights.
The budget airline has said...
Sean Spicer to be the reassuring new voice of Southern Rail
It was reported this morning that Southern Rail are headhunting Sean Spicer to be the new, reassuring voice of the beleaguered train service.
It's thought...
Dozens dead after Chris Grayling attempts to make cup of tea
News is coming in this morning of a terrible incident in central London that has left dozens dead and many hundreds horribly wounded.
Eyewitnesses have...
New bay platform at Rochdale station opens
Great news for Rochdalians!
As of October there are now 4- count em! 4- platforms at the beautiful train station!
The new platform - actually a...
Panicked London train commuters force open doors and flee onto tracks after friendly northerner...
London commuters forced open the doors of a packed rush hour tube train yesterday bringing the train to a complete standstill and causing power...
Michael O’Leary knocks doctor unconscious and drags him onto underbooked Ryanair flight
Ryanair CEO Michael O-Leary is in the crosshairs again today amidst allegations that he hit an asian doctor around the back of the head...
Ryanair cancels all flights to Russia
Ryanair have announced today that it is cancelling all flights to Russia in 2018.
The move that will be affecting almost no Irish passengers between...
Ryanair trials passengerless planes
Following the success of Google's driverless car experiments, Ryanair CEO Michael O'Leary has announced plans to shift the entire airline to passengerless planes.
O'Leary said...
British Airways Awarded Southern Rail Franchise
British Airways CEO Alex Cruising has spoken at his joy over the airline being awarded the shambolic Southern Rail Service.
"We can do this." He...
Birmingham Airport begins Windows 10 update
Birmingham Airport officials have announced they've accidentally started a Windows 10 update. The update is alleged to have caused the air traffic control centre...
TFL confirms London Underground to be extended to Scotland by 2021
London's continued plans to absorb the entirety of Great Britain into the never ending tentacles of its grotesque boundaries were handed a huge boost...
Daily Mail reveals that travelling on Virgin trains cures cancer
In a surprising u-turn, The Daily Mail has reported that travelling on Virgin trains cures cancer.
The report comes a week after it was reported...
“Travelling on virgin trains causes cancer” says Daily Mail
Health experts for the Daily Mail have revealed new evidence that travelling on Virgin trains causes cancer.
Daily Mail columnist, Biff Wellington told us, "We've...
Daily Mail reveal United Airlines assault victim once had an overdue library book
It has been revealed today that Dr David Dao, the passenger on a United Airlines flight who was beaten for sitting in a seat...
Ryanair to start offering passengers a punch in the face for £12.99
Ryanair's Michael O'Leary has told passengers that the airline will start offering people a punch in the face for as little as £12.99 from...
Ryanair fires first salvo in airline price war by introducing “shrinkflation” routes
Budget Irish airline Ryanair has fired the first salvo in it's threatened "summer fares war", but instead of cutting fares as everyone expected, CEO...
