Transport

May means May Passengers on the 11:12 Eurostar return to Britain have had a pointless argument over who is driving.  The train, which is rapidly descending below the sea, has not had anyone in control...

Commuters in Ormskirk were shocked today when a bus driver actually waited at a bus stop to allow a late arriving passenger to sprint down the road and catch her bus. Passengers already seated...

Southern Rail have announced the latest innovation to their transport, passengerless trains. Following the announcement of a move to driverless trains, bosses have decided to phase out passengers too. “It’s all quite logical really,” CEO Rex...

Ryanair's Michael O'Leary has told passengers that the airline will start offering people a punch in the face for as little as £12.99 from next month. In an announcement the airline said, "We were in...

Following the success of the reintroduction of beavers to Scotland, experts are planning to repeat the experiment with the rare and previously thought extinct Southern Train. Beavers, once natural to Great Britain, have successfully re-established...

The BBC has announced that Jo Swinson will replace Michael Portillo as host of the show, in much the same way as a smug self-important high profile politician losing their seat will henceforth be...

A strike by Southern Rail drivers due on the 9th of January has now been put back until the 10th. "We apologise for the late arrival of the strike," said a spokesbloke for the RMT,...

Following the furore over Philip Hammond's comments over female train drivers, The Rochdale Herald has been contacted by an employee of Southern Rail who has blown the whistle about the supposed difficulty of driving...

Reports from south London this afternoon state there was a dramatic and disturbing experience for dozens of Southern passengers when their train actually moved. The incident has been described by rail transport experts as unprecedented...

Ryanair have announced today that it is cancelling all flights to Russia in 2018. The move that will be affecting almost no Irish passengers between June and July next year. The low-cost airline described the...

London's continued plans to absorb the entirety of Great Britain into the never ending tentacles of its grotesque boundaries were handed a huge boost today. Transport For London excitedly announced news of a deal...

Sir Horton Brown, head of Southern Rail’s parent Go Ahead and Govia companies is to be replaced this week by the CEO of United Airlines in a bid to improve customer relations. Lord Littleroom, the...

Great news for Rochdalians! As of October there are now 4- count em! 4- platforms at the beautiful train station! The new platform - actually a half platform half bay thing: a bayform or a platay?...

A self professed "die-hard Socialist" has admitted he's a bit pissed off with railway strikes. Chris P. Bacon told us, "I support the right to strike, of course I do, I just wish they'd do...

Southern announced today that the endless years of appalling service were over. "We've been building to this moment." Someguywhohatespeoplesaid. "And today I can announce that we're replacing all our trains.” It seems the move was prompted by reports...

In a surprising u-turn, The Daily Mail has reported that travelling on Virgin trains cures cancer. The report comes a week after it was reported by The Rochdale Herald that the Daily Mail was reporting...