Google crashes as 17.4m people Google Parliamentary Democracy
Internet search engine Google has been brought to a standstill as a reported 17.4m people searched for the phrase "Parliamentary Democracy" this morning.
The Daily...
Owen Smith calls for another vote on leadership challenge
In a statement the bespectacled Bilko impersonator said;
"Just like on the issue of Europe, many people wanted a different outcome. I'd be prepared to...
Susan Boyle to sing Dead Kennedys ‘Too Drunk To F*ck’ at Trump Inauguration
In a last ditch attempt to find a "celebrity" to perform at Trump's Inauguration Scottish songstress and Britain's Got Talent sensation Susan Boyle (aka...
Height supremacists promise New World Order will be with us shortly
Growing support for alt-height movement Height Supremacists have a new doyen in the shape of Sixtus Rees-Mogg. Rees-Mogg initially attracted support with a very modern...
Australia to import convicts and export coal – Says Turnbull
Australian Prime Minister, Malcolm Turnbull, has left the G20 Summit with what he called a "stupendous new deal". After much grovelling to British Prime...
Even Hitler didn’t treat his press secretary as badly as this says Sean Spicer
Sean Spicer has been explaining how badly he has been treated by Donald Trump. Speaking to an assembled press corps Mr Spicer said, "Even...
Jeremy Corbyn crowned 2016 House of Commons Hide and Seek Champion
Jeremy Corbyn has won this year's Parliamentary Hide and Seek championship, after only emerging after everyone had stopped looking.
“You’ve got to give the Morning...
ISIS claim responsibility for Conservative Party Conference
The attackers wrote Boris’s jokes, Theresa May’s speech and arranged for all the letters to fall off the wall behind the Prime Minister during her main conference address in an audacious display of comic timing.
Trump Invades Iraq
President Trump has declared war on Iraq after a five minute conversation with Tony Blair.
The former British PM, referred to by White House officials...
Keep me out of the news says BoJo
A BBC news anchor disappeared in a cloud of bitter irony recently whilst reporting the story surrounding the Foreign Secretary’s reported texts asking to...
Dianne Abbott assures voters she’s feeling better after taking a Paracetamol
Dianne Abbott, the MP for Stoke Newington and The Shadow Secretary for Health, has assured both parliament and her constituents that she has almost completely recovered from having a bit of a headache.
Boris catches coronavirus despite consistently washing hands of all responsibility
Finally, after what feels like years of writing about this car crash of a government you NHS applauding, social distance ignoring flag shaggers voted...
UKIP pledge to bring back 70’s style pubic hair
UKIP have pledged to restore pubic hair to levels not seen since the 1970's, in a move they hope will secure the allegiance of...
Idiot turns on News and now can’t sleep
A man in Lancashire this evening accidentally turned on his television this evening to see Donald Trump leading Hillary Clinton in the polls in North Carolina and now definitely won't sleep.
UKIP Conference cancelled due to Tory success
The annual gathering of UKIP, scheduled for 16th September, will now not go ahead reports say.
"We have been watching the racism and general xenophobia...
Wonga provide financial aid package as Britain’s credit rating reduced
Payday loan provider Wonga has announced today that it has offered to step in and help the government. The move follows a further reduction...
