man with money

Wonga provide financial aid package as Britain’s credit rating reduced

0
Payday loan provider Wonga has announced today that it has offered to step in and help the government. The move follows a further reduction...

UK Government leads world in stable door shutting contest

0
The UK government has taken the lead in the worldwide contest to shut the stable door long after the horse has not only bolted...

Brutus advises senators to get behind Caesar

19
Marcus Brutus has urged the Roman senate to show support for their leader Julius Caesar. Addressing the press at a conference outside the Senate, he...
Marxist Bedwetter

Opinions of Entitled Marxist Bedwetters No Longer Valued says LSE

0
Social Science lecturers from the LSE were told they would not be asked to contribute to government work and analysis on Brexit.
Justine Greening

Secretary of State for Education, Justine Greening shows concern for pupils “Not talk good”

3
In the UK, education has always been of paramount significance, on par with the National Health Service, or ensuring that MPs have enough income...

Jeremy Corbyn appoints his teddy bears and security blanket to cabinet

0
The leader of the Labour Party Jeremy Corbyn has just had to give all his friends in the tree-house gang another reprimand. Having failed...
Christmas Morning

Only two prime ministers till Christmas

0
Children around the UK were feeling giddy this morning after learning that it's now officially on two prime ministers until Christmas morning. "I can almost...

I am still relevant, insists Nigel Whatsisname

0
EU milker and former leader of has been political party UKIP, Nigel Farage has gotten all salty after the government refused to give him...
David Davis

Brexit talks in crisis after Michel Barnier unfriends David Davis on Facebook

8
The UK's negotiations with the EU hit a stumbling block today, after it emerged that Michel Barnier has unfriended David Davis on Facebook. Brexit secretary...

Idiot turns on News and now can’t sleep

0
A man in Lancashire this evening accidentally turned on his television this evening to see Donald Trump leading Hillary Clinton in the polls in North Carolina and now definitely won't sleep.
Corbyn

Labour plans to make unions transfer power to workers

0
Large unions would be forced to transfer as much as 10 percent of their voting rights to workers under plans set out by the...
Daleks

Daleks to replace ‘exterminate’ slogan with ‘strong and stable’ for 2049 re-election bid.

7
?Speaking from a neutral zone hyperdock, leader of the New Dalek Empire Theres- Sorry, Dalek Sec, said today that the bid for re-election in...
Liam Fox

Saudia Arabia to pick next UK defence secretary

0
Saudi Arabia moved swiftly to reassure the British people this evening that the resignation of Michael Fallon has not caught them by surprise and...
Children At Christmas

Only 4 more Prime Ministers until Christmas, say children

0
Excitement at a Rochdale school is building after pupils discovered there are only 4 more Prime Ministers until Christmas. One teacher at the Robert Mugabe...

World now clear on just how much rope was needed for Donald Trump to...

0
The world has been quivering with excitement over President Trump's possible impeachment for some time now, like Kim Jong-Un's stubby digit over a big...
Conservative Party

ISIS claim responsibility for Conservative Party Conference

29
The attackers wrote Boris’s jokes, Theresa May’s speech and arranged for all the letters to fall off the wall behind the Prime Minister during her main conference address in an audacious display of comic timing.

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