Not enough evidence to convict Danczuk of rape says CPS
The Crown Prosecution Service has declined to prosecute Simon "Shagger" Danczuk on the basis that they are not confident they will secure a conviction.
Trump rushed to John Hopkins with severe burns
Donald Trump is said to be in a stable but critical condition this morning after being rushed to hospital suffering from self inflicted third...
A blue passport is an integral part of being British, says bloke who’s never...
The great victory that is Brexit has delivered old-style blue passport covers to the grateful people. Rejoicing Brits across the country have been applying...
Nuttall Calls For Ban On Dwarfism
UKIP leader Paul Nuttall has caused outrage today by Issuing a call for a ban on dwarves and "midgets and really just anyone suspiciously...
Tommy Robinson thrown out of restaurant after complaining about ‘Allah Cart’ menu
Tommy Robinson has been thrown out of a restaurant in Oldham after a campaign event today after starting a row with the manager over...
We must stick to our principles, says woman not sticking to her principles
Former Remain campaigner and comedy Prime Minister impersonator Theresa May told the British people that it's really important to stick to your principles shortly...
Lockheed Martin Trident Vote after party “off the hook”
Details are sketchy at present but apparently the Lockheed Martin Trident Vote after party was absolutely "off the hook".
We can only imagine what kind...
Reading the Daily Mail causes cancer of the soul
Following sickening reports of yet another moron mowing down innocent pedestrians, the Daily Mail has excelled itself by implying that the victims were to...
Brexit bias uncovered in Westminster
After detailed research, leading academics have revealed a list of staunchly pro Brexit MPs and have demanded that the old, rich white people in...
Man left fuming after blue passport cover turns out to be Prussian blue
A Rochdale man has spoken of his anger after his new blue passport cover turned out to be Prussian blue with gold lettering.
Cliff Edge...
Tory superbug found in pigs
A variant of the antibiotic-resistant superbug MRSA normally found in old Etonians and Conservative Party politicians has found its way into the nation's...
New dress code requires MPs to wear oven gloves in Parliament at all times
The UK Parliament's Committee on Standards has announced plans to require all male MPs to wear oven gloves whenever they attend the building.
The Committee...
UKIP elect Diane James leader
UKIP have elected Diane James as their new leader.
Apologies for our previous article that featured Mick Jagger from The Rollong Stones.
Our intern Douglas has...
DUP advises British Gas customers to burn witches and Catholics to keep warm this...
Princess Diana's body is to be exhumed and hung on a gibbet outside Buckingham Palace to commemorate the 20th anniversary of the last witch-hunt...
Jacob Rees-Mogg descended from German immigrants genieologists confirm
Plans by eccentric far right conservative politician Jacob Rees-Mogg to be elected leader of the Conservative party have been delivered a body blow as...
White House confirms all its press staff do coke
The White House has admitted today that all its press staff do coke.
The admission comes after the latest mouthpiece for President Trump, Mr Scaramucci,...
