Universities to charge £4K a year for fruit picking courses to prepare students for...
In proposals aimed to meet the agricultural sector’s labour needs post Brexit universities will be allowed to charge up to £4K a year for...
EU offers bribe of better UK weather if we remain
The European Union, desperate for the UK to remain, have said that the proposed European Standard Weather system due to come into operation early...
Earthlings stunned to learn the meaning of the word ‘Liberal’
Following Donald Trump's election, the entire population of Earth has completely forgotten how to use the word 'liberal'.
Despite the word meaning someone who is...
Labour foreign policy just Dennis Skinner with a cricket bat
Jeremy Corbyn's anti-Trident, peace before war principles have long caused concern amongst critics and fellow MPs.
"He'll lie down and let anyone who wants to do...
It’s not a popularity contest, really unpopular MP tells voters
An extremely unpopular MP has just informed voters that the upcoming general election is not a popularity contest.
The MP addressed the crowd and urged...
Shadow equalities minister forced to resign after being published in The Sun
“I was stacked up on Coke and painkillers when I wrote it.” Said the ex-secretary of state for women, men, badgers and quality street.
Obama quietly pleased his G20 riots were bigger than Trump’s
President Barack Obama, who was born in America, is said to be privately pleased the riots at G20 summits he attended were bigger than...
Jacob Rees-Mogg descended from German immigrants genieologists confirm
Plans by eccentric far right conservative politician Jacob Rees-Mogg to be elected leader of the Conservative party have been delivered a body blow as...
Tony Blair ego in critical condition after found clinging to Brexit controversy in Atlantic
After being lost for several months following his exile from the UK, Tony Blair's ego has been found clinging desperately to a Brexit controversy...
‘GO HARD OR GO HOME’ Corbyn screams at Shadow Cabinet
Three Labour frontbenchers have been sacked and a fourth has resigned after voting for a Queen's speech amendment calling for Britain to remain within...
David White follows The Rochdale Herald on Twitter
The editorial team were said to be jubilant at the news this evening that former England, Leeds and Manchester City centre forward David White...
Argument for abortion makes argument against abortion
Underchinned Tory leadership hopeful Jacob Rees-Mogg has upset both women and homosexuals today by saying he is opposed to same-sex marriage and abortion under...
Nadine Dorries replaced as MP for Mid Bedfordshire with nice plate of warm mince
Following her bizarre statement in which she decried the Brexit deal as leaving the U.K. with no MEPs and no representation on the EU...
Rochdale Herald boycotts future White House coverage
In a shock announcement, the Founding Editor of this esteemed organ has declared it will be withdrawing from future coverage of the current White House...
George Osborne seen in Waitrose buying fava beans and a nice Chianti
Following news reports of comments made by Old Screw Eyes, former chancellor of the Exchequer, serial job hoarder and moneybags George Osborne, it appears...
Irony pronounced dead after UKIP spokesman warns Corbyn Government would ‘take Britain back to...
Experts have announced that irony is dead. The announcement came after a UKIP MEP said that Britain would be plunged back to the early...
