Rees Mogg Farage

Massive bell end demands to hear massive bell end our EU relationship

11
Jacob Rees-moog is leading a rabble of conservative political bell ends drunk on Prosecco demanding to hear a big bell chime on the day...

Philip Hammond apologises to women on cabinet for making sexist comment at ‘wrong time...

6
Philip Hammond has today apologised for his insensitive remarks about women by buying them all a jolly nice big bar of chocolate and a...

Supreme Court rules Theresa May is not allowed to break the law

0
In a completely pointless landmark ruling costing millions the Supreme Court has had its final say. Brexit means Brexit, which means both the Houses Parliament...
Nice Nurse Senior Patient

Medical advances mean some students might survive long enough to pay back debts PM...

5
The woman pretending to be British Prime Minister is expected to increase her appeal to the younger demographics today. She will do it by...

Miley Cyrus to sue Boris Johnson for £350M over unauthorised cover of “Wrecking Ball”

4
The worlds of entertainment and politics appear to have combined this morning with the speculation that pop superstar Miley Cyrus is expected to sue...
Theresa May

Conservative cabinet worried compensating fire survivors properly will just make them dependent on the...

20
Government emissions today suggest the Prime Minister and her cabinet are struggling to respond to last week's fire tragedy in a way that meshes...

Theresa May: Donald Trump told me to grab EU by the pussy

0
Donald Trump told Theresa May that she should "grab the EU by the pussy" rather than ask for its consent, according to an interview...
Government

Government advises British Gas Customers to follow their example and burn bridges for fuel...

1
Most U.K. bridges are built or stone and iron. This will mean a boom to hardware retailers as Britons rush to stop up on pickaxes and wheelbarrows in order to carry their winter fuel allowance home.

World shits itself after Putin spotted smiling

0
Political commentators in Moscow are all-a-chatter today over the unprecedented gossip that Vladimir Putin has been observed smirking slightly.  The current record was set in...

ISIS withdraw from Iraq after Blair’s return to politics announcement

0
Tony Blair yesterday announced that he intended to fill a massive hole and that after that he'd return to British politics. In an interview he...

Auschwitz could be next Centre Parcs if they just knock down the gas chambers

0
A Government official is alleged to have told an audience at a fringe event of the Conservative Party conference that Auschwitz could become a...

Campaign to buy McDonnell new calculator raises £65,000,000

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The public have rallied behind calls from Robert Chote, the Chairman of The Office for Budget Resposibility to buy The Shadow Chancellor, John McDonnell, a new calculator.
fox cubs

Corbyn supports hunting with dogs repeal in Government manifesto

0
Jeremy Corbyn has pledged to support the Conservative Party's promise to repeal the fox hunting ban. This appears to be the result of him mishearing...

British businesses fat and lazy, says podgy bloke who does sweet FA for a...

0
Liam Fox, who was sacked from the previous government for being a dodgy sod, has said that British businesses are fat and lazy and...

David Cameron to star in remake of Max Headroom

0
David Cameron is to take the lead role in a remake of cult 80's sci-fi film and TV show, Max Headroom sources close to...

Public outcry as politician caught out telling the truth

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Big news in the world of politics today where the Mayor of Rushcliffe has been lambasted for not lying.  Christine Jeffreys, Mayor of Rushcliffe...

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