Home Office confirms that new blue UK passports will be HALAL-CERTIFIED

0
The Home Office has confirmed that the United Kingdom's post-Brexit passport covers will be halal-certified. The iconic Royal blue cover, which is due to be...

Substitute teacher to stand in for Theresa May in hope of improving cabinet discipline

0
Wilma Beard, a graduate teacher on the books of an education supply agency, has been contracted to fill in for Theresa May in the...

UK Government leads world in stable door shutting contest

0
The UK government has taken the lead in the worldwide contest to shut the stable door long after the horse has not only bolted...

In absence of dragons, brave knight slays thousands of poor, disabled and homeless

0
Albion; pleasant, fair and green In the year of our Lord, 2020 Dragons were few and seldom seen, Yet poor folk were a plenty   Though dragons were vanquished...

DUP offer to support May if she kicks Bishop Brennan up the arse

52
The Democratic Unionist Party has offered to support Theresa May's minority government on the condition that she kicks Bishop Brennan up the arse, according...
Turkey

Turkeys delighted they’re able to finally “get Christmas done”

0
Turkeys up and down the country are said to be delighted that they are now in a position to finally "get Christmas done." "We've been...

Conservative Christmas Party cancelled after failing to negotiate piss up deal with brewery

0
There was despair throughout the Conservative Party today after government officials announced that the annual Christmas do has been cancelled. The news comes after many...
Theresa May

Get behind my shit deal or we won’t be able to do dreadful thing,...

0
Theresa May has urged MP's to get behind her awful Brexit plan or risk not being able to have Brexit. With many people warning that...

?Britain First & UKIP oddly quiet about white family abusing student visa rules

0
Quite why the public aren't offended by the white, middle class family trying to buck the immigration system is baffling academics as anti-immigration campaigners...

60 million Americans explore cryogenic freezing to escape Trump

0
With the ordeal of four years of President Trump looming over the horizon millions of Americans have applied to be cryogenically frozen for his term in...
Dominic Raab

Dominic Raab warns against travel to Iran and other Scandinavian countries

0
The foreign secretary Dominic Raab has warned British nationals not to travel to Iran or any other Scandinavian countries following last week's US airstrikes...

Mugwump? That hoofwanking spangletwat needs to stop spafftrumpeting says Corbyn

0
Earlier this morning Boris Johnson MP called Jeremy Corbyn a 'Mutton-headed Mugwump'. Full time buffoon and part time Foreign Secretary is known for his creative language...
David Cameron

Cameron brings attention to himself to avoid attention being on him

0
David Cameron, pig-fiddling, radish-faced ex-PM has decided to step down as an MP. Cameron, who nobody has so much as glanced at in Parliament since...
Michael Gove

Gove is still bonkers, say experts

0
Michael Gove decided to stand up for those whose lack of self awareness is pathological today.

Scientists admit Rees-Mogg is experiment to create the perfect twat

0
There was mild surprise today, as the lid was blown off a secret program revealing that Tory MP Jacob Rees-Mogg was the product of...
nurses

Overpaid nurses treat Berkshire woman for injuries sustained pruning magic money tree

2
Medics at all major NHS hospitals in central London are on tenterhooks hoping to be the ones to treat a middle aged woman who...

Follow us

61,169FansLike
29,631FollowersFollow
21,670FollowersFollow

Popular Posts