Theresa May makes audacious bid for Jorge Mendes to replace David Davis.
With the transfer window now open, Theresa May is expected to make David Davis available for transfer whilst putting in a bid for Jorge...
Boris Johnson sneezes and accidentally appeals for 32 British people to be stoned to...
Boris Johnson has apologised for his "sneeze" during comments about a bus full of British women on holiday in Saudi Arabia.
The foreign secretary said...
Tate & Lyle sponsor cabinet meetings
After what critics are calling a feeble effort to tackle childhood obesity the government is now in hot water again as it transpired that...
Jeremy Corbyn insists he’ll remain Labour leader even after death
Serial metaphorical and actual seat avoider, and leader of a thousand students ineligible to vote, Jeremy Corbyn, has announced that nothing will stop him ruining the...
Put lipstick on a pig and it’s still an attractive pig says David Cameron
Embarrassed confusion reigned over the little Cotswold village of Slapstick-cum-Quickly as local resident David Cameron joined a misheard conversation and totally got the wrong...
Boy Scouts of America deny meeting Donald Trump
The Boy Scouts of America have issued a statement denying meeting Donald Trump.
“It never happened. It's fake news folks.” The statement begins.
“Only a sick,...
Labour to legalise Liam Fox hunting confirms Jeremy Corbyn
Labour has confirmed a new manifesto pledge today following the announcement by Theresa May to allow a free vote on reversing the 2004 fox...
I’m nothing like Steve Bannon – says Darth Vader
Darth Vader took to Twitter today to distance himself from "that evil bastard" Steve Bannon after Bannon compared himself to Darth Vader, Thomas Cromwell, Dick Cheney and Satan.
EU to force UK to use £ s d following Brexit…
Brussels has warned that Britain will no longer be allowed to use the decimal system following Brexit and will be forced to go back...
Labour lose 30 seats in boundary adjustment, laugh Tories
The Conservative Party and the conservative government have denied that the electoral boundary change proposals are an attempt to ensure a Conservative advantage.
"It's just...
Former KGB thug Is UKIP leader’s hero
Diane James, former Transvision Vamp singer current UKIP führer, says Vladimir Putin is one of her political heroes.
Speaking on The Sunday Politics, the Dot...
Election Was Rigged Claims Trump – Recount Demanded
Donald Trump has sensationally claimed that the 2016 US Presidential Election was rigged and he is demanding a recount.
Trump wears tinfoil hat to stop Obama hearing his thoughts…
President Donald J. Trump has come up with an ingenious solution to prevent Obama from ‘spying on his thoughts’. He now wears a tinfoil...
Boris Johnson awards Carillion contract to build bridge to France
Boris Johnson's office has revealed that the Government will award the contract to build a bridge between Britain and France to construction company and...
Liberal Democrats secure vital Rastafarian vote
The Liberal Democrats' General Election campaign took a huge step forward this morning after they secured the vital UK Rastafarian vote.
Samuel L Jackson to provide voiceover for Conservative DUP deal
The world of entertainment is buzzing with the rumour that Samuel L. Jackson is to provide the voiceover for the Conservative DUP agreement announced...



















































