Possible to know same amount about Brexit by trying to hide from it as...
As you stagger to the bathroom in the morning, arriving before you remember you have knees, and try to get all your strikingly yellow...
ISIS win the war by leaving passports at home
America, Russia and the United Nations admitted defeat earlier today and proclaimed ISIS the winners of the global holy war.
President elect Trump has already...
It’s not a popularity contest, really unpopular MP tells voters
An extremely unpopular MP has just informed voters that the upcoming general election is not a popularity contest.
The MP addressed the crowd and urged...
Steve Bannon Torn Over Best Way To F*ck The Disabled
Following reports that Donald Trump will no longer repeal an Executive Order protecting LGBT rights, White House insiders have revealed that his Chief Strategist,...
Farage to Play Farage in “Brexit the movie”
Spielberg declined to outline the full plot of "Brexit" but did confirm that it would involve a number of "dream sequences" in which Farage wrestles and kills a great white shark, unearths the ark of the covenant, liberates Auschwitz, clones dinosaurs and rescues an American soldier trapped behind German lines in world war two France.
Corbyn hospitalised after collapse
Man of the people Jeremy Corbyn was today airlifted by helicopter to A&E after a suspected smugness overdose .
The incident occurred just moments after...
Treasury seek OAP to sit in baked beans to fund Social Services
In a surprise press release, the Treasury have today revealed a novel initiative to bolster funding for cash-starved Social Services.
In the statement, Chancellor of...
May to seek permission from Rupert Murdoch to sack Boris Johnson
The Rochdale Herald can reveal this afternoon that Theresa May is alleged to have written to British Prime Minister Rupert Murdoch seeking permission to...
Britons aghast at realisation that Brexit Bonus is Michael Gove as P.M.
Ordinary, innocent Britons, along with many who voted Leave, were faced today with the horrendous realisation that the much vaunted 'Brexit Bonus' was likely...
Poll reveals public wants good old fashioned political sex scandal
A Herald survey reveals that public perception of politicians lean towards disappointment at them not having any juicy sex scandals anymore.
Carried out at the...
Failed withdrawal expected to lead to painful Labour
Using the withdrawal method requires a high level of self-control. Even then, the withdrawal method isn't especially effective.
On the face of it (which is...
MP’s take well deserved autumn break after sorting out all UK’s problems
Westminster is demob happy today as hundreds of MPs pack their bags and await their family’s driver to come and collect them for half...
Whitehaven and Cumbria to Leave UK Launch of Cumbria Independence Party CUMFUK
Emboldened by her landslide victory in the Copeland By-Election, new MP Trudy Harrison has announced that she is leaving the Conservative Party to campaign...
Rishi Sunak to announce 80% wages to be replaced by a free bike
The Chancellor of the Exchequer is set to announce that the job retention scheme, which sees those workers furloughed by their employer receive 80%...
Trump in Mexican standoff
Donald Trump today paid a flying visit to Mexico for talks with President Pena Nieto.
Amongst his entourage was his new Foreign Policy adviser Jeremy...
Contractor used for Tory conference stage wins £2bn social housing contract.
The contractor used for the Tory conference stage set has been awarded a £2bn social housing contract.
Brian Odget and Simon Carper, who have been...
