Idiot turns on News and now can’t sleep
A man in Lancashire this evening accidentally turned on his television this evening to see Donald Trump leading Hillary Clinton in the polls in North Carolina and now definitely won't sleep.
Theresa May outrages Japanese Prime Minister with deportation letter
British Prime Minister Theresa May has become embroiled in a diplomatic incident while visiting Japan after personally delivering a Home Office deportation letter to...
Who needs firemen anyway asks DUP clad Tory government
There was anger in parliament last night as the government narrowly defeated a motion by the Labour Party to end the cap on public...
Letter F dies of embarrassment during conference speech
Paramedics and specialists in typesetting were seen rushing to the site of a terrifying incident at the Conservative Party conference in Manchester earlier in...
KKK David Duke polling better with black voters than Donald Trump
In news that feels like it should be satire but is in fact oddly true, Dr David Duke, the Grand Wizard of The Ku...
Woman appalled by Alabama abortion laws ‘sort of aware’ of Northern Ireland
LLocal woman Mia Wombley has been telling everyone she knows about the horrendous new legislation in Alabama. Local senators, duelling their banjo strings, have...
Dr Samuel Beckett stuck in 2016 after failing to ‘put right what once went...
In the mid 1990's Physicist Dr Samuel Beckett blazed a trail by stepping into his Quantum Leap accelerator and vanishing.
In actual fact he woke to...
Fake stories exposed: Herald gets its Snopes on.
Everyone is concerned with fake stories recently so we at the Herald have gone all Snopes and trawled the web to reveal all the...
ISIS Second In Command Killed Again
The Daily Express has reported for the eighth time this month the death of so called Islamic State's second in command.
"He was killed by...
Only 4 more Prime Ministers until Christmas, say children
Excitement at a Rochdale school is building after pupils discovered there are only 4 more Prime Ministers until Christmas.
One teacher at the Robert Mugabe...
52% support euthanasia bill
The Government has been urged to hold a referendum on euthanasia following research that showed that 52% of voters would support the introduction of...
Trump administration to ban 1984 and burn Fahrenheit 451
The United States Federal Communications Commission (FCC) will be confiscating all copies of George Orwell’s novel 1984 and burning all copies of Ray Bradbury’s Fahrenheit 451,...
Labour MPs win right for toilet break during final vote on Brexit deal
After a tense round of debating in the house of commons Labour MPs succeeded in forcing through an amendment to the Brexit bill which...
Bands line up to celebrate Trump’s impeachment
The Rochdale Herald can exclusively reveal the star studded line up already in place for celebrating the impeachment of Donald Trump, expected to take...
Farage in critical condition after fall at a supporters meeting
Nigel Farage is in hospital today after coming to the defence of ludicrously abhorrent comments made about women by Donald Trump.
Doing Right Thing Would Set Dangerous Precedent, Says Prime Minister
Prime Minister Theresa May has announced that she won't intervene in David Cameron's scheme to reward all his mates with Honours.
"Listen here," said an...
