Tories Include Return of Death Penalty In Election Manifesto
The Conservative Party has surprised many by including a return of the death penalty in their election manifesto.
Explaining the eye catching manifesto promise, Jacob...
President Trump tells reporter to ‘lick my donkey balls’ and denies Donald Trump jnr...
Donald Trump mounted a sustained attack on the media during a fiery and at times chaotic news conference today, aggressively denying that Donald Trump...
Terrorists rejoice at lower energy bills as Jihadis unplug TVs
Terrorists worldwide are saving money on their energy bills as millions of Jihadis unplug their Samsung smart TVs from mains sockets.
The move comes after...
Monster Raving Looney Party offers UKIP electoral pact
UKIP may have lost all but one of its local council seats in England and Wales, in a disastrous showing in local council elections...
Slightly right leaning liberal centrist wishes everybody would just piss off
Slightly right leaning liberal centrists declared publicly today that they wish everybody would just piss off.
"I wish everybody would just piss off." Bob "Bobby"...
Medical advances meant most students will survive to pay back large debts PM reassures...
The woman pretending to be British Prime Minister is expected to increase her appeal to the younger demographics today. She will do it by...
Theresa May to meet Carwyn Jones to tell him to fuck off in person
Theresa May is set to meet Carwyn Jones, the First Minister of Wales to reassure him that the needs, plans, hopes and dreams of...
Whitewash of establishment nonces in the interests of the children – says dame
Amber Rudd is set to give evidence to a commons committee on the state of the inquiry into child sexual abuse in place of...
Sun exposes Cable as Strawberry fool
Liberal democrat leadership candidate "SIR" Vince Cable has been left looking a plum strawberry fool after his claim that Britain was running out of...
Get behind my shit deal or we won’t be able to do dreadful thing,...
Theresa May has urged MP's to get behind her awful Brexit plan or risk not being able to have Brexit.
With many people warning that...
Shadow equalities minister forced to resign after being published in The Sun
“I was stacked up on Coke and painkillers when I wrote it.” Said the ex-secretary of state for women, men, badgers and quality street.
Boris tweets ‘I’m safe’ after car crash interview
Britain's comedy foreign secretary, Boris “The Bewildered” Johnson, is lucky to be alive and well, tweeting “I’m safe!” just moments after his disastrous interview...
What’s the fuss, I loved playing sardines with nanny
Boris Johnson has met Jeremy Corbyn's attack on the Conservative's record on education today with incredulity.
Gove Demands Westminster Soft Play Area
Michael Gove MP caused elation inside Kate Hoey MP today with his demand for a soft play area at the Palace of Westminster.
Gove, the...
I’m President of what? Asks Donald Trump
After the shock of winning the popularity contest "President Factor", President elect Trump has now talked about his next career move. We asked him...
Australia to import convicts and export coal – Says Turnbull
Australian Prime Minister, Malcolm Turnbull, has left the G20 Summit with what he called a "stupendous new deal". After much grovelling to British Prime...
