Being interviewed about your job is a bit like being raped, says chinless toad
The United Kingdom has apologised "unreservedly" for making Michael Gove a Cabinet Minister after he compared being raped to being a bit like being...
Lib Dem election breakthrough as Tim Farron recognised in Tesco Express
The Liberal Democrats are said to be heartened by the progress they've made in this election campaign after reports that a member of the...
Conservative cabinet worried compensating fire survivors properly will just make them dependent on the...
Government emissions today suggest the Prime Minister and her cabinet are struggling to respond to last week's fire tragedy in a way that meshes...
There are three kinds of lies: lies, damned lies and Boris Johnson’s statistics
UK Statistics Authority have reaffirmed the old adage today that there are three kinds of lies: lies, damned lies and Boris Johnson's use of...
Home Office confirms that new blue UK passports will be HALAL-CERTIFIED
The Home Office has confirmed that the United Kingdom's post-Brexit passport covers will be halal-certified.
The iconic Royal blue cover, which is due to be...
What’s the fuss, I loved playing sardines with nanny
Boris Johnson has met Jeremy Corbyn's attack on the Conservative's record on education today with incredulity.
Corbyn Backs May In Commons Vote Again
"I'm sure I can remember one, if you just give me a minute." Jeremy Corbyn replied this afternoon, following the Commons vote to call...
Ed Millibland defeated again at PMQ’s
Leader of the Opposition, Boris Johnson, once again tore into Mr. Millibland's 'weak' and 'out of touch' Government.
Since successfully leading the remain campaign in...
UKIP elects Diane James leader
Diane James was elected the leader of UKIP yesterday and has already been causing controversy on account of not being Nigel Farage.
People outside of...
Foreign words banned from entering English language March 2019
Foreign words already resident in the native tongue, like Welsh ones, will be allowed to remain after England (and the others) exit the EU.
Susan Boyle to sing Dead Kennedys ‘Too Drunk To F*ck’ at Trump Inauguration
In a last ditch attempt to find a "celebrity" to perform at Trump's Inauguration Scottish songstress and Britain's Got Talent sensation Susan Boyle (aka...
May is a dead duck pushing a white elephant, says Lord Harris
Carpet magnate Lord Harris has given May a high-quality luxury carpeting. "May is a dead duck pushing a white elephant" is not quite what...
Cricketers injured as dyslexic Anarchists riot at T20
Two Yorkshire cricketers and a number of spectators were injured last night as nearly 200 dyslexic anarchists rioted at the T20.
Similar riots took place...
Chips aren’t as tasty as live mice confirms Prime Minister
In an attempt to appear more human Theresa May took a break from eating her usual diet of live mice and had one of her aides...
SNP Manifesto just bootleg copy of Braveheart and sheet of paper saying Referendums
The long awaited SNP manifesto is released today to huge anticipation.
Conservatives pledge ‘free pots’ for poor to piss in
In the latest Tory manifesto promise benefit claimants and people earning less than minimum wage are to be sent a free chamber pot.
Current Work and...
