Boris Johnson shocked to discover British Empire no longer exists

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Foreign Office officials have confirmed that Boris Johnson has finally accepted that the British Empire no longer exists, more than a year after he...

HS2 in doubt after MPs voice concern about providing an army of white walkers...

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Lord Chris Greyling, Secretary of State for Transport, revealed this afternoon that the government is considering changing its mind over HS2 out of health...

Picture yourself in their shoes

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A picture of Omran Daqneesh, the five year old boy who was pulled from the rubble that used to be his home in Aleppo,...

Government reassures that Brexit talk delays are all part of the plan

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Number 10 has today reassured the Rochdale Herald that everything is in good order and that they do, in fact, know what they are...
Children At Christmas

Only 4 more Prime Ministers until Christmas, say children

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Excitement at a Rochdale school is building after pupils discovered there are only 4 more Prime Ministers until Christmas. One teacher at the Robert Mugabe...

Politicians human too. Balls!

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Speaking on the Jeremy Vine show on BBC Radio 2 this afternoon, Strictly Come Dancer Ed Balls made the outrageous claim that politicians are...
Theresa May

Theresa May to meet Carwyn Jones to tell him to fuck off in person

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Theresa May is set to meet Carwyn Jones, the First Minister of Wales to reassure him that the needs, plans, hopes and dreams of...
Theresa May

“Don’t worry, my government will soon be gone.” May reassures a worried public

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Theresa May stood outside 10 Downing Street this afternoon to reassure an increasingly worried country that, "Don't worry, my government will soon be gone." "It...
Trump Bed

Is Trump as well hung as May’s Parliament?

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Hard on the heels of the revelation that President Donald Trump has fake Time Magazine covers hanging on the walls of his golf course...

Dirty Politics

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Britain's next Prime Minister is guaranteed to be female but what most people don't know yet is that only one of the contenders will...
Rich People

Millionaires ‘very sorry’ following £70,000 fine

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A political party full of millionaires has said that the huge £70,000 fine they received for breaking electoral rules will really teach them a...

Satirist sues CNN for stealing Trump Headline

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The Rochdale Herald has issued a cease and desist letter to CNN after they stole a satirical headline about Donald Trump.

Paul Golding’s Prison-a-thon raises £5,000 for The Refugee Council

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On an uncharacteristically serious note we'd like to thank each and every person who has donated or otherwise supported Paul's campaign for The Refugee Council.

Tory superbug found in pigs

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A variant of the antibiotic-resistant superbug MRSA normally found in old Etonians and Conservative Party politicians has found its way into the nation's...

I wish it could be Brexit everyday

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When the pounds begins to fall and economic growth begins to stall It puts a great big smile on a remainer’s face If you dive...
The Sun

Shadow equalities minister forced to resign after being published in The Sun

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“I was stacked up on Coke and painkillers when I wrote it.” Said the ex-secretary of state for women, men, badgers and quality street.

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