riot

Anarchists praise efficiency of German train network as G20 riots start on time

11
The German city of Hamburg is hosting the 2017 G20 summit in which world leaders come together to discuss and agree on action on...

I married him for rugged good looks and winning personality claims Melania Trump

18
Melania Trump has gone on the record to tell the world that she married Donald Trump not for his money but his rugged good looks, winning personality and his open minded views on immigration.
unhappy man

Google crashes as 17.4m people Google Parliamentary Democracy

1
Internet search engine Google has been brought to a standstill as a reported 17.4m people searched for the phrase "Parliamentary Democracy" this morning. The Daily...
face palm

Hammond to read policy documents before saying them out loud in future

0
Phillip Hammond, for now at least Chancellor of the Exchequer, has announced that in future he will "have a butchers at" major policy documents...

Talking Turkey; Leadsom Embroiled In Referendum U-Turn Debacle

0
Conservative leadership candidate hopeful Andrea Leadsom was remaining tight lipped this morning following revelations that she has 'pulled a u-ey' over the recent referendum...
Danczuk

Rochdale Online to give Danczuk day off

0
In a miraculous change of heart Rochdale Online has decided to give the suspended MP Simon Danczuk a break. Editor Sandra Simonhater said "He...
Theresa May

Nah, I said smashed through a field of weed fam, claims PM

18
There’s bare girl jobs and mandem jobs, you feel me? “When’d all y’all start getting so disrespectful?” said Theresa May yesterday. “Maybe it was that Lord...

ISIS Propose Christmas Cease-Fire Kickabout

0
ISIS troops fighting around the city of Palmyra have suggested that hostilities be put aside for a few hours at Christmas for an informal game of football with opposing ground forces.
Executioner with axe

U.S. prepares for Steve Bannon’s execution

0
Following an interview in which Steve Bannon compared himself to Tudor-era royal adviser Thomas Cromwell, America is making hasty preparations for the execution of Donald...

Treasury seek OAP to sit in baked beans to fund Social Services

0
In a surprise press release, the Treasury have today revealed a novel initiative to bolster funding for cash-starved Social Services. In the statement, Chancellor of...
Gibraltar

Gibraltar dispute with Spain jeopardises Leave voters’ retirement plans

0
Come and have a go if you think your armada enough After nearly two years of complaining about the hard line EU negotiator Michel Barnier...
Donald Trump

Actor playing Donald Trump forgets stage directions

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Due to White House budget cuts, an experienced but cheap actor was selected for the part. Bit part "character actor" Rowle Player is best...

Johnson replaces Cabinet with the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse

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Boris Johnson committed himself to leading Britain into 'a new chapter' yesterday. Downing Street sources revealed that the chapter referred to by the tousled...

New Tory Crabbs Clinic opens in Rochdale

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Great news for Rochdale's Yorkshire Street just keeps rolling in. As well as being a wonderful area for shopping, entertainment and food, it's also...
Boris Johnson

Boris Johnson Sits In With Infant School Maths Class, Answers 350 Million To Every...

0
Boris Johnson seems to have a one-track mind when it comes to numbers. While visiting an infants' school in Rochdale, he sat in on...
Hang the Tories

Corbyn sharing platform with people he disagreed with to create peace, says man in...

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A man who is wearing a t-shirt that reads "Hang the Tories" is insisting that Jeremy Corbyn is an example to everybody for his...

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