Diane James, former Transvision Vamp singer current UKIP führer, says Vladimir Putin is one of her political heroes. 

Speaking on The Sunday Politics, the Dot Cotton look-alike said her political heroes are the man behind the Gallipoli tragedy, Churchill; right-wing pleb hater, Margaret Thatcher and former KGB officer and current dictator-pretending-to-be-president, Vladimir Putin.

A spokesracist for UKIP told the Herald that we shouldn’t assume that she agreed with Putin having his rivals murdered, annexing neighbouring countries and being a mad, homophobic, racist shit as it was just the good things he did she agreed with. Like changing the law so he can be in power indefinitely. 

“Look, she only mentioned Putin because it would be political suicide to admit that that Austrian fella with the silly lip-brush was her real hero, because you can’t say that because of political correctness!”

The UKIP leader is expected to be invited to every BNC programme for the next four years, as Farage was.

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Quentin D Fortesqueue is a founding editor of The Rochdale Herald. Part time amateur narcissist and full time satirist Quentin is never happier than when playing his lute and drinking a full bodied Bordeaux. He rarely plays the lute and never gets to drink Bordeaux.