Conservatives pledge ‘free pots’ for poor to piss in
In the latest Tory manifesto promise benefit claimants and people earning less than minimum wage are to be sent a free chamber pot.
Current Work and...
Stubborn turd refuses to flush
A massive turd that is blocking the downstairs bog next to the Cabinet Meeting Room in Downing Street has been studiously ignoring hints that...
DUP offer to support May if she kicks Bishop Brennan up the arse
The Democratic Unionist Party has offered to support Theresa May's minority government on the condition that she kicks Bishop Brennan up the arse, according...
DWP declared May’s vocal cords fit for work
The budget statistics for the Department for Work and Pensions can often hide the raw human stories of the effects of poverty and joblessness.
In...
Greggs announce Paris as post Brexit Euro trading base and name change to De...
Food supremo Greggs announced via a Rochdale Herald exclusive today that they have chosen Paris for their post Brexit trading headquarters and will soon...
Jeremy Corbyn demands General Election so voters can choose between Brexit or Brexit
Jeremy Corbyn has demanded that the Government call a General Election in order that the public can choose between his insane version of Brexit...
Jacob Rees-Mogg completely opposed to jazz music and women in trousers under any circumstances
During an appearance on The One Show this week, Conservative leadership favourite and plum-voiced time traveller, Jacob Rees-Mogg admitted his firm 1920s beliefs meant...
Fury as UK migration laws mean that London will be SWAMPED with Brummies by...
Birmingham is a modern, cosmopolitan city whose motto, Forward, sums it up perfectly. The smug, self-serving shithole that is London is the reverse. With...
Clinton Email Cache Found in Historic Exeter Hotel
The American election process was thrown into confusion yesterday when the FBI moved into the Royal Clarence Hotel, Exeter, in search of a hidden...
Jeremy Corbyn rules out coalition with Labour MPs
Jeremy Corbyn took the bold move today to rule out a coalition with SNP, The Greens, The Liberal Democrats and any of the politicians in The Labour Party.
Talking to...
Government reassures voters post-Brexit ration books will also be blue
The government has taken bold steps today to reassure the public after a leaked Whitechapel report detailed how the UK is likely to face...
New American National Anthem Unveiled As ‘Donald Donald Uber Alles’
The United States is getting a new national anthem, it has been announced. An executive order has been signed replacing the old anthem, The...
Gap between rich and poor not an issue say rich bastards
The massive gap between the poorest peoples' lot and the vomit-inducing wealth of the world's richest isn't really important, insist representatives for the world's...
Football referees warned not to go against the will of the people
Following criticism of High Court Judges 'interfering' in the Brexit process, the Football Association have decided to get rid of football referees.
"We don't need...
UKIP and Corbynista trolls to colour code social media posts to avoid confusion.
UKIP and the Corbynista wing of the Labour Party have reached a landmark agreement to prevent social media posts by their respective trolls and sock puppets...
Tests prove evolution has stopped among UKIP supporters
Groundbreaking research at Rochdale Technical University's Institute of Genetic Engineering has confirmed that evolution has stopped working, and in some cases is being reversed,...
