Skeletor still ‘pretty buff’ for a skeleton

0
Men's Health Magazine today announced its annual Top Ten Fittest Male Celebs list with actor, recently elected DUP MP and self proclaimed evil overlord Skeletor...
nurses

Overpaid nurses treat Berkshire woman for injuries sustained pruning magic money tree

2
Medics at all major NHS hospitals in central London are on tenterhooks hoping to be the ones to treat a middle aged woman who...

David Cameron having pigs in blankets for Christmas

0
A close friend of the Camerons', who wishes to remain anonymous, has said that the former PM 'is looking forward to his Christmas day...
unhappy man

Emails found on MP’s pornhub viewer

0
A forensic investigation of Damian Green's computer has revealed that it was used for viewing emails, conducting research and processing documents, confirming that...
Denis Skinner

Labour Conference to go ahead as Dennis Skinner with baseball bat confirmed as security

0
The Labour Party have announced that their conference will go ahead despite G4S laughing in their faces when begged to supply security. "We are sorry...

UKIP Neighbour in Festive Twat Fiasco

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A member of UKIP has made the news after showing the good old, British, Christian spirit: he's built a large billboard to piss off...
Dumpster Fire

Dumpster fires unhappy about comparisons to US Democracy

13
Skip fires around the world have declared they are unhappy with being compared to the US democratic process.

Daily Mail Exposed as a False Newspaper

3
Jonathan Harmswoth, 4th Viscount of Rothermere, controlling shareholder and current chairman of the Daily Mail has finally come clean and admitted that the newspaper...

Tory leadership contest to be between Mark Francois and two slices of cheap ham.

0
With Theresa May's grasp on power reduced to the nail varnish on one finger, the candidates to replace her have been formally announced. Weighing in...

Nigel Farage thrilled to hold onto Question Time Seat

Nigel Farage has responded to criticism from Andrew Neill that Brexit Party no longer has a reason to exist following their total annihilation in the exit...
T20

Cricketers injured as dyslexic Anarchists riot at T20

9
Two Yorkshire cricketers and a number of spectators were injured last night as nearly 200 dyslexic anarchists rioted at the T20. Similar riots took place...

Car bombs not as bad as nicking stationery insists Martin ‘I’m a politician’ McGuiness

4
Former number three in the Irish presidential election Seamus Martin Pointa McGuinness has resigned from his position as Deputy First Minister of Northern Ireland. The...
TRUMP POLE DANCERS

Trump hails Polish culture saying “Pole dancers are the best, I’m a huge fan,...

9
US President Donald Trump Thursday attempted to cement US-Polish relations in a speech delivered in the Polish capital Warsaw on the first day of...

Wolverhampton and Dudley will declare independence from the West Midlands ‘in a matter of...

114
Wolverhampton & Dudley will declare independence from the West Midlands in a matter of days, the leader of the autonomous region has told the...

‘One is married to Philip’ Queen reminds Public who think Trump too racist for...

6
Over 1.8 million Britons have signed a petition to deny a State Visit to nylon-haired snake-oil salesman and part-time President, Donald Trump.  The petition insists...
fox cubs

Percentage of foxes voting for Conservatives hits all-time high

0
A spokesfox for the Confederation of Midland Foxes, who asked to be identified only as Foxy McFoxface said "She might be stark raving bonkers, but at least...

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