Jeremy Hunt Pictures Issued To Stop People Choking

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A new cure has been unveiled by the NHS to stop people choking - looking at pictures of Jeremy Hunt. This seemingly controversial move actually...

Gillette admit razors not suitable for sensitive skin

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International razor brand Gillette has admitted that after years of investment, their product is not suitable for the delicate skin of the modern day...
nurses

Nurses threaten to go on saving lives if public sector pay cap isn’t removed

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Nurses have upped the ante with the Government by sensationally threatening to continue to act in a professional fashion in their ongoing dispute over...
Angry man, steam coming from ears

Stickupthearseitis

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A new disease, spread apparently by social media, is endangering the nation. Stickupthearseitis affects hundreds of people everyday and symptoms include getting salty over satire...
Couple with dog

Season your pets before leaving them in a hot car

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do With temperatures hitting 30°C across the nation, dog owners have been warned to pay special attention to their four legged friends. Each year the RSPCA...
Hospital

Salisbury hospital closes and two critically injured after being exposed to Jeremy hunt

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Salisbury hospital was closed today and 2 people are still critically ill today amidst extraordinary scenes said to be the result of Jeremy Hunt. The...

Tory superbug found in pigs

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A variant of the antibiotic-resistant superbug MRSA normally found in old Etonians and Conservative Party politicians has found its way into the nation's...

5G blamed for amnesia as thousands of twats forget to be Islamophobic

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Amidst growing concern from the internet's top pseudo-scientists about the risks posed by mobile technology, yet another coal has been added to the fire. According...

Daily Express reveal AIDS originally created by Corbyn as anti-Tory bio-weapon

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Ground-breaking new research by Daily Express reveals Labour leader, Jeremy Corbyn, created a modern day plague in league with the IRA As we all know,...

Jeremy Hunt to introduce Pay Per View Patient Records

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NHS officials have confirmed reports that health minister Jeremy Hunt has been hacked. "Since his initial appointment as health minister in 2012 we have been working on...

NHS declares tap water is much more cost effective than homeopathy

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The NHS has declared that it's probably a better use of money to invest in tap water than provide homeopathy provision. NHS spokesperson Dr Gary...

Man Flu Worse Than AIDS Cancer And Ebola Combined Say Scientists

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We've all heard of the dreaded Man Flu in our time, but a team of scientists in Rochdale have finally catalogued the full effects. “The...

Total Coincidence that Virgin hospital take over and massive NHS cuts announced while parliament...

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The Conservative Party today claimed once again that the NHS is "safe" in their hands, and denied that huge cuts to NHS services will...
analogue

Government digital service actually still analogue

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The government’s “digital service”, a branch of the cabinet office and the one that was meant to protect the government’s computer systems against cyber...

Dentist warns that Halloween treats ages teeth of refugees

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The spokesman for the Royal College of Dental Surgeons has issued a warning not to feed sweets to starving children.

UK obesity epidemic to be tackled by driving the Coca-Cola truck through towns and...

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Coca Cola have announced that the driver of their self-proclaimed ‘traditional’ Christmas Truck has been instructed to keep moving through the UK towns and...

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