NHS declares tap water is much more cost effective than homeopathy
The NHS has declared that it's probably a better use of money to invest in tap water than provide homeopathy provision.
NHS spokesperson Dr Gary...
If you lot weren’t so clumsy we wouldn’t need A&E, says Jeremy Hunt
The Minister for Health, Jeremy Hunt, has stated during an interview with our reporter that the pressure felt by A&E staff up and down...
Evil Tory bastards sign off on pay increase for 1.3 million NHS workers
Over a million NHS staff including front line nurses and paramedics are expected to receive 6% pay increases, the Rochdale Herald has been told.
Anti-Vaxxer has very messy carpet
In an ironic twist that would give Alanis Morissette a run for her money, local Anti-Vaxx campaigner Tarquin O'Flerfer is reported to have a...
Massive chip dislocates Katie Hopkins shoulder
There were grave concerns for Katie Hopkins today when the massive chip she uses as a shoulder deepened and caused her arm to calve...
George Michael declined 33rd heart transplant after ‘giving them away’
The 80's pop sensation 90's cop bothering loiterer and naughties stoner George Michael has been refused the vital surgery by the NHS.
Chief Cardiovascular Surgeon...
Britain shows appreciation for NHS by funding it properly
Britain has decided to show its appreciation for the NHS by funding it properly.
The nation has made the decision that it doesn't matter...
NHS to be shut down so sick people can get used to feeling poorly
In a shock move Sunday UK chancellor Philip Hammond, announced that his first budget on Wednesday will outline plans for a complete end to...
Jacob Rees-Mogg announces plan for every UK baby to have his DNA by 2040
This is a key policy behind Rees-Mogg's bid for the Conservative party leadership.
According to leaked documents, he is going to take his cue from...
Morning-after pill still cheaper than taking kids to Spain during School Holidays insists Boots Chief...
High street chemist Boots have defied public pressure to reduce the price of their emergency contraceptive pill claiming it represents excellent value for money...
NHS Commodore 64 hacked with ‘ransom cassette’
The NHS is in a state of crisis after its computer was hacked earlier today.
Patients requiring emergency care are being re-routed to different hospitals around...
Coronavirus maybe more deadly than Iain Duncan Smith warns Government
The Government is warning that Coronavirus could be more deadly than Iain Duncan Smith. The warning comes as the number of cases in Britain...
Snake oil cures are for idiots, say snakes
A spokesnake for snakes everywhere has said that snake oil cures not one single disease known to man.
"I get that being mortal is terrifying...
Littlest Hobo declared fit for work by ATOS
Everyone remembers getting a little teary to the Littlest Hobo, don’t they?
Each episode he’d make some friends and then leave, just as they were...
Hunt solves NHS waiting list crisis with introduction of geological clock
Health Secretary Jeremy Hunt has solved the problem of NHS waiting times by making hospitals use the geological clock.
After coming under increasing pressure from...
New Doctor Who to charge for consultations according to Jeremy Hunt
As science fiction fans eagerly await the announcement from the BBC about the identity of the umpteenth actor to play the timelord, The Rochdale...



















































