Anti-Vaxxer has very messy carpet
In an ironic twist that would give Alanis Morissette a run for her money, local Anti-Vaxx campaigner Tarquin O'Flerfer is reported to have a...
Crossfit cult ‘survivor’ makes full recovery after being rescued
A former member of the cult of Crossfit, Steve ‘Tits’ Day, has spoken for the first time having made a full recovery from his formerly...
Stressed nurses sick of sick people
Shedloads of stressed-out British nurses are leaving the profession because they are fed up with their working conditions and marginally better than national average...
Gillette admit razors not suitable for sensitive skin
International razor brand Gillette has admitted that after years of investment, their product is not suitable for the delicate skin of the modern day...
Rochdale sex romp for Ozone Day
Friday 16th of September was World Ozone Day but residents of a care home in Rochdale have been getting hot under the collar after...
Daily Express reveal AIDS originally created by Corbyn as anti-Tory bio-weapon
Ground-breaking new research by Daily Express reveals Labour leader, Jeremy Corbyn, created a modern day plague in league with the IRA
As we all know,...
IMPORTANT ADVICE TO STOP SPREAD OF VIRUS
The Rochdale Herald would like to pass on advice regarding the nasty viral infection which has reared its ugly head in the UK recently.
Please...
Despite Brexit vote UK National Sperm Bank to close due to wanker shortage
Despite all evidence to the contrary the U.K. Is suffering from a profound wanker shortage after the National Sperm Bank recruited only seven wankers in two years.
Britain shows appreciation for NHS by funding it properly
Britain has decided to show its appreciation for the NHS by funding it properly.
The nation has made the decision that it doesn't matter...
Government digital service actually still analogue
The government’s “digital service”, a branch of the cabinet office and the one that was meant to protect the government’s computer systems against cyber...
Disaster as it’s revealed Government only has enough Care badges for 1 in 5...
Undercover reporters for The Rochdale Herald have discovered that the Government only has enough "Care" badges for 1 in 5 care workers as part...
‘Deadly viruses don’t kill people, people kill people,’ claims Ebola
In a bid to improve its reputation as one of the world's most lethal pathogens, the Ebola virus has today sought to shift the...
Salisbury hospital closes and two critically injured after being exposed to Jeremy hunt
Salisbury hospital was closed today and 2 people are still critically ill today amidst extraordinary scenes said to be the result of Jeremy Hunt.
The...
Scandal rocks vegan community as it’s revealed they’re made of meat
For years normal people have been subjected to snooty vegans looking down on them and preaching how immoral they are for eating animals just because they taste delicious.
Surgeons delighted to confirm the operation to remove Piers Morgan’s head from Donald Trump’s...
Surgeon's at London's exclusive Portland hospital have declared the Piersectomy a complete success.
In an operation that lasted 8 hours, the world's finest surgeons have...
Tiny Tim declared fit to work by ATOS
Dickensian child, "Tiny" Tim Cratchitt has been declared fit to work by ATOS this week despite being both famously crippled and fictional.
His father, Robert...
