Rochdale letting agency wins top award. 

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A prestigious national industry award has been won by local letting agents Fyre, Trappe and Hassel.   The British Association of Letting Agencies awarded the firm their much sought after "Services to innovative bastardry" award...
Cyclist in rain

Prize boffin apparently unaware of weather

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The winner of this year's Dyson James Dyson Boffin Admired By Dyson's James Dyson Award, is Isis. No, not the naughty middle eastern twerps, a boffin whose name is Isis Schiffer. Ira, sorry I mean Isis,...

RBS announces plan to rebrand as The Money Pit

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The Royal Bank of Scotland has today announced losses of 7 billion pounds in the fiscal year of 2016. The Bank has been running at a loss of several billion a year since the global...
Cyclist

New guy at work definitely up to something

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Employees from a Rochdale conservatory company have been explaining how a new employee is definitely up to something. Simon Simpson started on Monday and told us, "It's been good so far. Everyone is really...
Jumbel Sale

Online tat markets filling up with utter crap that ‘Would make a great Christmas...

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As the nights draw in and the last of the pre-winter rituals of ‘Children Demanding Sweets by Menaces’ night, ‘Throwing Fireworks at Cats’ night and ‘Outing Traitors Not Wearing a Red Flower’ day are...

eBay To Close Sundays 

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The world's biggest online auction site has today announced plans to close every Sunday to give all their low paid workers a much needed day off. Currently trading 365 days a year, 7 days...
Smiling Liam Fox

Liam Fox Announces Trade Deal With Iraq

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Liam Fox, Secretary of State For International Trade, has followed up the success of his charm offensive with Duterte, the leader of the Philippines so in love with summary execution. Speaking from the west of...

Global economy near collapse after George Osborne pulls sickie

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It has been revealed that once George Osborne takes up his post as Editor of the London Evening Standard, his importance to the global economy will have crossed a critical threshold. Should Osborne take a...

British Company Based In Britain Backs Britain

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Brexiters across the land are jubilantly crying "We told you so!" after GlaxoSmithKline, a UK company, based in the UK, that wanted the UK to stay in the EU admitted that despite never saying...

Retire in 5 years with JuicelifeHealthwonder!

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A couple from Rochdale insist that the multi level marketing scheme they're pushing is not a scam and that anybody can retire within 5 years. "This JuicelifeHealthwonder Plus opportunity is totally different from all those...

Florence and the McMachine

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McDonald's is suing Florence over claims that the historic city is "promoting a healthy diet & lifestyle contrary to Western values
refrigerator

Sales of refrigerators tumble due to British Gas price hike

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This week brought the news that British Gas are set to raise their prices again, effecting millions of loyal customers. This move will likely see many poor and vulnerable homeowners left with difficult choices, as...

Middle class first time buyers struggling to afford luxury and luxury homes

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Middle class first time buyers are up in arms over house prices this week as the housing market continued to slow while the price of beautiful, conveniently located luxury homes continues to rise. "It's ridiculous."...
Chocolate

Theresa May outraged over plans to drop Great from Great Britain

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Chocolatiers are responding to Theresa May's ire this afternoon after "Great" was dropped from "Great Britain " in a number of confectionary products. From now on "Great Britain's Parliament Boiled Lollies" will simply be "Britain's...
Calendar

Government Announces National Nothing Day.

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From worthy issues such as International Women’s Day to cultural stereotypes like National Tea Day, it seems like every day is "something" Day. Just about anything you can imagine, there’s a day for it;...

Post Office denies responsibility for items lost in Post

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Today The Post Office officially denied responsibility for undelivered items getting lost in the postal system. Post Office spokespostie, Patrick Clifton, told The Herald; "It's the job of the sender to pay enough postage to reach...

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