Business

The age old question of trying to persuade employees to continue to care about work on a Friday has vexed employers for decades. A popular choice is appearing to tolerate diversity, of clothing, in...

The winner of this year's Dyson James Dyson Boffin Admired By Dyson's James Dyson Award, is Isis. No, not the naughty middle eastern twerps, a boffin whose name is Isis Schiffer. Ira, sorry I mean Isis,...

  High end retailer, Lewis Veeton Moway, has closed its doors for the last time, citing poor sales despite a massive promotional campaign. Rupert Cholmondley-Featherstonehaugh, the CEO of the bling-to-Bentley store, said, "We had little option...

Vodafone has won a bid to convert the iconic Eiffel Tower into a transmission mast, it has emerged. The telecommunications giant secured the deal for an undisclosed sum after a fierce contest with the French...

Reports that several British workers have had their employment terminated from the world famous British sofa manufacturer Zestra, because they failed to learn Polish have caused outrage and disbelief in Rochdale this week. One worker,...

Inspired by an undercover report on working practises at the JD Sports Warehouse in Rochdale, the Governor of HMP Prison Manchester, Dave Morrisey, had an epiphany; "Strangeways is rife with drugs, mobile phones and violence,...

Budget Irish airline Ryanair has fired the first salvo in it's threatened "summer fares war", but instead of cutting fares as everyone expected, CEO Michael O'Leary has surprised the industry by instead cutting the...

Amnesty International have written a strongly worded letter to the shareholders of JD Sports and the CIA urging them not to open a warehouse on the US base on Guantanamo Bay in Cuba. "Life is...

Leaked document reveals the Government has begun a refit of four derelict seaside hotels in Kent for use as internment camps housing dissenters during Brexit negotiations. Camps are to be codenamed "Grauniad", "Mirror", "Rochdale...

The Irish government and their opposition are in agreement that they shouldn't have to tax corporations after an EU court suggested that perhaps Ireland shouldn't have allowed Apple to pay less in tax than...

Jeremy Corbyn has called yet another emergency cabinet meeting today after Rochdale superstar Adnan Khan resigned from his position as Shadow Culture Secretary. Corbyn's press secretary called the meeting after Adnan tweeted his resignation with a...

It turns out that you’re more likely to find something that fits if you close your eyes and dig around in a skip or the boot of a stranger’s car than at TK Maxx.

Specsavers has announced it has signed a two-year deal as official sponsors of the forthcoming World War Three, with effect from mid November. The company beat off stiff competition from other brands keen to associate...

British roadside dining legends Little Chef have decided to make all their breakfasts, including their famous ‘All Day Breakfast’, entirely pork-free following a campaign by ‘hooded foreigners’ who accused them of discrimination and uncleanliness. The...

Online megatrader Amazon has issued a cease and desist order against the Moon, obliging the satellite to end its intended traverse between the Sun and the earth, lawyers acting for the company announced. According to...

UK retailers were left smirking knowingly today as momentum gathered for the Buy Nothing Day campaign, being run on the same day as Black Friday.  The campaign which urges people not to buy a single...