Business

The Shard in London is nearing completion, according to developers. Once finished, it will stand at 310m and will be the tallest building in the United Kingdom and the 105th tallest in the world. Construction began...

Sir Horton Brown, head of Southern Rail’s parent Go Ahead and Govia companies is to be replaced this week by the CEO of United Airlines in a bid to improve customer relations. Lord Littleroom, the...

Self assured fuck nugget Mike Ashley, CEO of Sports Direct, pulled the idiotic stunt at one of his sweat shops earlier today. Keith Stitcher, a devoted employee of ten years, spoke of the spectacle: "It was...

McDonald's is suing Florence over claims that the historic city is "promoting a healthy diet & lifestyle contrary to Western values

People in Rochdale have been speaking of the shock at discovering HMV has collapsed again. Many thought it had gone bust years ago. Stan Still told us, "I...

Three Tesco directors are in court on fraud charges. The food-fancying fanatic (alleged) fraudsters have, it seems, been cooking the books as well as cooking all manner of tempting produce. The whiff of bullshit...

It turns out that you’re more likely to find something that fits if you close your eyes and dig around in a skip or the boot of a stranger’s car than at TK Maxx.

Business - Residents left worried by the collapse of Carillion and ensuing loss of local services have been given the news by local MP Gavin Reidy that a new provider has been identified and...

Online megatrader Amazon has issued a cease and desist order against the Moon, obliging the satellite to end its intended traverse between the Sun and the earth, lawyers acting for the company announced. According to...

Swedish furniture and home-ware giant IKEA have announced that it plans tolaunch a new range of "post Brexit furniture and home-ware" to suit the depleted pockets of the post Brexit British public. Speaking to the...

Last year vegans and social justice warriors, fighting on behalf of un-offended Hindus and Sikhs, absolutely lost their shit because of the Bank of England's new £5 notes. 'Tallowgate l', as it became known, sparked...

Local businessman Vinnie 'Fingers' McPherson entered the big league in the world of high finance today when his appearance on TV's popular Dragon's Den show took him from pitch to rich. "I love doing this show" a...

The Big 6 electricity providers are set to impose a special levy on households deemed to have displays of more than 5 metres of Christmas lighting this year.  The energy companies are concerned that with...

After a turbulent day for Jeremy Corbyn, things could be looking up as he adds a Rochdale superstar to his new cabinet.Rochdale's answer to Dappy from Ndubz, Adnan Khan is rumoured to be the...

Apple is to sue Samsung after the Korean electronics giant recalled its flagship Galaxy Note 7 smartphone after the battery repeatedly blew up during or after charging. "We have received several reports of battery explosion...

The Irish government and their opposition are in agreement that they shouldn't have to tax corporations after an EU court suggested that perhaps Ireland shouldn't have allowed Apple to pay less in tax than...