Lenny Henry

Premier Inn to change all the locks tonight

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Every Premier Inn in the country is changing their locks tonight, whilst Lenny Henry hosts Red Nose Day on the BBC. Mr. Henry was the...

Heck release new range of Boris Johnson porky pies

Sausage giant Heck has hosted giant sausage Boris Johnson at their Yorkshire factory for the unveiling of their latest new product. The Boris Johnson Heck...

Trump to rename Black Friday White Friday

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Today news has reached us here at The Herald that President elect Donald Trump has insisted Black Friday (the traditional start of the festive...

Waitrose appoint new Head of Egg Hiding

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Supermarket giant Waitrose today announced the appointment of Alex Bell as the new Head of Egg Hiding. Proudly the UK market leader in un-helpful shop...

Sports Direct CEO burns millions of pounds in front of staff

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Self assured fuck nugget Mike Ashley, CEO of Sports Direct, pulled the idiotic stunt at one of his sweat shops earlier today. Keith Stitcher, a...
Cathedral City

Cathedral City Cheddar not the best cheddar ‘just fucking unavoidable’ say consumers

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According to consumers in Rochdale Cathedral City Cheddar is not the best cheddar, it’s just completely unavoidable. A survey of all of the fridges in...

This Generation of British Bulldogs could be the last

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In an astonishing move by the Kennel Club, the standards committee has released a press statement saying that if Britain decides to stay within...
Money

Nigerian Prince perplexed no one wants free money

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Prince Terry Ojukwu III, of Nigeria, recently ran into financial difficulties when his bank fell into administration, leaving him just 24 hours to withdraw...
Blindfold Car Boot Sale

You’re more likely to find nice top at car boot sale wearing blindfold than...

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It turns out that you’re more likely to find something that fits if you close your eyes and dig around in a skip or the boot of a stranger’s car than at TK Maxx.

British Company Based In Britain Backs Britain

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Brexiters across the land are jubilantly crying "We told you so!" after GlaxoSmithKline, a UK company, based in the UK, that wanted the UK...

iPhone users left feeling cheated

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Thousands of iPhone users around the globe were left feeling cheated this week as they eagerly awaited news of the latest model from technology...

Retailers unconcerned by “Buy Nothing Day”

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UK retailers were left smirking knowingly today as momentum gathered for the Buy Nothing Day campaign, being run on the same day as Black...

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