Birmingham Park in Snow

‘No Bad News Day’ in West Midlands after all morons are snowed-in

0
The West Midlands is experiencing record low levels of bad news and buffoonery as the majority of the population took advantage of a plausible...
Bono

Several million Irish sign petition to tie Bono to a fecking kite

49
The good people of the Emerald Isle know how to take advantage of this windy bollocks A petition to "tie Bono to a fecking kite"...
BMW

You can’t skid if you don’t brake, confirm BMW drivers

0
One of Britain's leading self-proclaimed driving experts was kind enough to give the Herald some tips on how to drive safely in the snow. "Don't...

Aging pop acts battle over who inspired Storm Caroline

0
As reports develop of the latest weather front to hit the UK, it appears that a storm is brewing in the music world that's...
Red moon

Northerners scared by red moon consult wise woman and prepare sacrifices

0
Looking outside last night millions of British citizens were confronted by the moon appearing enlarged and glowing a curious red. Whilst most people south of...

One dead and two critical after fight over last packet of burger buns

0
At approximately one o'clock this afternoon emergency services were dispatched to the Cooperative convenience store in Middleton. The initial response was to investigate a...

2017 set to be hottest year on record

0
Experts in worldwide trends are predicting that 2017 will reach terminal levels of warmth by mid-June. Professor Thorfin Nerfstretcherrsson, Head of Rochdale Community University's department...
Shirtless fat man

For f*ck’s sake put a top on, men told

Men have been asked to put some clothes on because they really shouldn't be in the pub half naked.  Professor Gareth Linkeker of the Institute...

Climate Change still insisting Donald Trump is a Chinese Conspiracy

0
Climate Change has today confirmed that it will continue on its promise to make the Weather Great Again despite the insistence from some it...
Sunshine

Cumbrian Man hospitalised after lethal exposure to Vitamin D

0
The recent weather worries in Cumbria worsened this morning, after 12 minutes of unseasonable partial sunshine exposed a fell walker to lethal levels of...
Riot Police

Sweaty riot erupts in Leeds after Argos runs out of pedestal fans

4
As the temperature hits 25C in Leeds sweaty rioters armed with Soleros and Lyon's Maid Choc Ices are rioting in Leeds Centre and are...
Car Stuck in snow

Motorist who travelled during red weather alert furious car stuck on motorway for 15...

0
There were ugly scenes this morning after a motorist lost his temper having been stuck on a motorway in a major tailback for 15...

Olympic Bobsled team advised not to drive to work because it’s a bit slippery...

0
After celebrating the amazing success of Team GB at the Winter Games, winning 5 medals at a cost of only £28 million, the whole...
Gritter

Morons wondering why blizzard wasn’t averted by thin layer of salt

0
Millions of morons across the UK were left perplexed when a thin layer of salt didn't prevent their cars getting stuck in 3 feet...

Shipping alert as Monster Fatberg spotted in Caribbean

1
The Caribbean is facing more misery this week as islanders struggle to deal with the destruction left in the wake of Hurricane Irma. What has...
Duck

Great weather for ducks, confirm ducks

0
Ducks around the UK have confirmed that they are having a really lovely day and are enjoying the weather. Speaking from the middle of a...

Follow us

61,169FansLike
29,631FollowersFollow
21,670FollowersFollow

Popular Posts