The recent heatwave shows no sign of abating with another four weeks of sunshine forecast by the Met Office.

A hosepipe ban has been enacted by local councils as United Utilities has reported an increase of 500 million litres of water per day being used in the North West; whilst fire services are working day and night to try and quell bush fires in the moorlands of Bolton and Manchester.

Burnley however has been praised by United Utilities and the Environmental services.
“Burnley has the lowest water consumption per head in all the North West” said a spokesman from the water board.

We at the Herald asked some Burnley locals how they go about saving water.

“Well, like most people round here, in an effort to save on water, I decided not to have my bath this month,” said Ian Stinkly.

“No one washes their cars round here either, if someone from the job centre sees you doing that, they’ll start asking you where your crutch has gone and saying you’ll be classed as fit for work.”

Burnley council has also enacted measures to keep water consumption down but ensure locals stay hydrated

“We’re making sure every household gets a hydration care pack” said Greg McScum of Burnley council.

“These packs contain two litre bottles of frosty jacks and a couple of Lemon VHFs for the kids.”

19th century vegetable highwayman/ satirist. Likes: the sound of a solitary house fly loitering hectically around his ear and the feeling of a warm toilet seat. Favourite topic: writing about political intrigue involving biscuits.