Army of White Walkers causing delays M1 Southbound
Drivers and commuters are facing another difficult day of delays and difficult journeys across the UK after a second night of freezing temperatures.
The Met...
Town centres full of fat topless pricks for some reason
Town centres are chock full of topless, pasty white fat pricks for some reason according to sources.
For some reason thousands upon thousands of fat...
Geordie accused of ‘cultural appropriation’ after wearing jacket during night out
A Geordie is being criticised by social media users for posting an Instagram photo of her wearing a jacket during a night out on...
Sweaty riot erupts in Leeds after Argos runs out of pedestal fans
As the temperature hits 25C in Leeds sweaty rioters armed with Soleros and Lyon's Maid Choc Ices are rioting in Leeds Centre and are...
Google breaks under search query strain after hot weekend
Google breaks under the strain of millions of Britons preparing their excuses for work on Monday morning.
As millions of us check up on the...
It’s a bit windy out
People all over the UK who have ears and access to either a door or a window have confirmed that it's a bit windy...
Northerners scared by red moon consult wise woman and prepare sacrifices
Looking outside last night millions of British citizens were confronted by the moon appearing enlarged and glowing a curious red.
Whilst most people south of...
Man spotted not wearing his ‘Big Coat’ in Rochdale, in June
In scenes that shocked many shoppers in Rochdale town centre today, two men who were visiting from far away Bolton, were seen walking through...
Rest of world ceases activity so BBC can cover snow
As Britain is experiencing the worst snow since last time,the rest of the world has decided to cease all activities and events to let...
Julian Assange makes the most of the hot weather by opening a window
Julian Assange has spent the weekend enjoying the bright sunny weather by sitting in a room in the Ecuadorian embassy with a window open.
The...
Patio chair braces himself for Storm Brian
A patio chair in Milnrow is bracing himself for an absolutely terrible few days after news that yet another storm with high winds is...
For f*ck’s sake put a top on, men told
Men have been asked to put some clothes on because they really shouldn't be in the pub half naked.
Professor Gareth Linkeker of the Institute...
Britain WARNED to expect seasonally COLD WEATHER in winter AGAIN
The UK has been warned that parts of the country could get a bit colder now that it is December for the billionth year...
Reality of snow destroys childhood memories of it being fun
Thousands of stay at home parents forced to play with their slack off kids all day have had to revise their 'happy childhood memories'...
Several million Irish sign petition to tie Bono to a fecking kite
The good people of the Emerald Isle know how to take advantage of this windy bollocks
A petition to "tie Bono to a fecking kite"...
Northern Dad puts heating on
Confirmed reports are in that a Northern Dad in Lancashire has put the central heating on.
Airports throughout the UK have been closed, all trains...
