Gritter

Morons wondering why blizzard wasn’t averted by thin layer of salt

0
Millions of morons across the UK were left perplexed when a thin layer of salt didn't prevent their cars getting stuck in 3 feet...
Bono

Several million Irish sign petition to tie Bono to a fecking kite

49
The good people of the Emerald Isle know how to take advantage of this windy bollocks A petition to "tie Bono to a fecking kite"...

Is the EU to blame for Storm Ciara?

0
As Storm Ciara batters it's way across the country we at The Rochdale Herald ask, is the EU to blame? Bill Board, Wetherspoons Raconteur. "Of course...
Snow on trees

Britain urged to get used to winter

0
With the annual two inches of snow set to cause havoc across the country again experts have advised people to stop whining and get...
Sunshine

Town centres full of fat topless pricks for some reason

0
Town centres are chock full of topless, pasty white fat pricks for some reason according to sources. For some reason thousands upon thousands of fat...
Audi

Sixty grand on four wheel drive for one off drive to work in snow...

0
A man has confirmed that his choice of Audi Quattro was justified by the recent inclement weather. Chris Lupton spent most of the morning in...
Angry Man

Google breaks under search query strain after hot weekend

0
Google breaks under the strain of millions of Britons preparing their excuses for work on Monday morning. As millions of us check up on the...
Snow on Street

Completely expected and predictable weather causes travel disruption and chaos again

0
Britain prepares itself once again for total travel chaos and public service disruption, because of the completely predicable weather that is expected at this...
Red moon

Northerners scared by red moon consult wise woman and prepare sacrifices

0
Looking outside last night millions of British citizens were confronted by the moon appearing enlarged and glowing a curious red. Whilst most people south of...
White Walkers

Army of White Walkers causing delays M1 Southbound

0
Drivers and commuters are facing another difficult day of delays and difficult journeys across the UK after a second night of freezing temperatures.  The Met...

Julian Assange makes the most of the hot weather by opening a window

12
Julian Assange has spent the weekend enjoying the bright sunny weather by sitting in a room in the Ecuadorian embassy with a window open. The...

One dead and two critical after fight over last packet of burger buns

0
At approximately one o'clock this afternoon emergency services were dispatched to the Cooperative convenience store in Middleton. The initial response was to investigate a...

Britain WARNED to expect seasonally COLD WEATHER in winter AGAIN

0
The UK has been warned that parts of the country could get a bit colder now that it is  December for the billionth year...

Winter 2016 enters third consecutive year

0
Meteorologists have confirmed that winter 2016 has entered its third consecutive year. With more bloody miserable weather forecast officials at the Met Office have concluded...
Sunbathing woman

Homeworkers warned to wear suncream as UK heatwave intensifies

0
With expectations that this month's sweltering weather could become the norm a health strategy is urgently required to protect the thousands of people who...
Riot Police

Sweaty riot erupts in Leeds after Argos runs out of pedestal fans

4
As the temperature hits 25C in Leeds sweaty rioters armed with Soleros and Lyon's Maid Choc Ices are rioting in Leeds Centre and are...

Follow us

61,169FansLike
29,631FollowersFollow
21,670FollowersFollow

Popular Posts