Town centres full of fat topless pricks for some reason
Town centres are chock full of topless, pasty white fat pricks for some reason according to sources.
For some reason thousands upon thousands of fat...
RSPCA urges pet owners to at least season with salt and pepper before leaving...
In the current heat wave the RSPCA has urged pet owners to undertake special precautionary measures when traveling with their furry friends this bank...
Britain WARNED to expect seasonally COLD WEATHER in winter AGAIN
The UK has been warned that parts of the country could get a bit colder now that it is December for the billionth year...
Sweaty riot erupts in Leeds after Argos runs out of pedestal fans
As the temperature hits 25C in Leeds sweaty rioters armed with Soleros and Lyon's Maid Choc Ices are rioting in Leeds Centre and are...
One dead and two critical after fight over last packet of burger buns
At approximately one o'clock this afternoon emergency services were dispatched to the Cooperative convenience store in Middleton. The initial response was to investigate a...
Red Weather Warning as Conservative Politicians spotted with hands in own pockets
With temperatures plummeting across the British Isles, many patriotic politicians are complaining at their lack of opportunities to escape the country.
Conservative Politicians Jeremy Hunt,...
Rochdale Council to vote on plan to colour snow
Rochdale Council are to consider a plan to colour snow to make it more representative of the cultural mix of the area.
The Rochdale Multi-Cultural...
Extreme weather leaves KFC with too much chicken
As 'The Beast From The East' takes a firm hold across the UK, KFC have announced that it is overrun with chicken as no...
God pisses himself laughing after sending hurricane named for Harvey Milk to wipe most...
God Almighty has reportedly pissed his pants laughing after sending a biblical flood to the most homophobic state in America in response to Donald...
Facebook Meteorologists Out In Force
The annual outing of Facebook Meteorologists is in full swing. Facebook servers are under severe strain from the pictures of the first inclement weather...
Army of White Walkers causing delays M1 Southbound
Drivers and commuters are facing another difficult day of delays and difficult journeys across the UK after a second night of freezing temperatures.
The Met...
UKIP call for Global Warming referendum
In what is seen as a bid to rescue UKIP from self-inflicted obsolescence, leadership hopeful and Anthony Head lookalike, Steven Woolfe has today called...
Northern Dad puts heating on
Confirmed reports are in that a Northern Dad in Lancashire has put the central heating on.
Airports throughout the UK have been closed, all trains...
Weather still not good enough to lure sulky teenager out of his bedroom
Despite the change in the weather, cloudless skies and temperatures in the high 20s, it is still not enough to persuade moody teenager, Damian...
Google breaks under search query strain after hot weekend
Google breaks under the strain of millions of Britons preparing their excuses for work on Monday morning.
As millions of us check up on the...
Is the EU to blame for Storm Ciara?
As Storm Ciara batters it's way across the country we at The Rochdale Herald ask, is the EU to blame?
Bill Board, Wetherspoons Raconteur.
"Of course...
