Vegetable that looks like Prince Charles discovered on Rochdale allotment

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A Rochdale man has spoken to us about vegetable he has found that looks remarkably like Prince Charles.  Bill Board told us, "It was last...

‘It’s pronounced KWINAH, you pretentious f*ckwits’ confirms Quinoa

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Middle class consumers were left reeling today after one of the much beloved 'super foods' they incessantly extol the virtues of confirmed that everyone...
Neuroscience

Everyone on Facebook now an expert in neuroscience

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It's been revealed that millions of Britons on Facebook are now experts in neuroscience. The revelation comes just weeks after millions of people were found...

No binary education says May

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Prime Minister Theresa May has heralded new education reforms by telling us that there will be "no return to the binary system of the...

Beards still cool, insists man with beard

As far as flash in the pan fashion trends go the 2015-2016 beard pandemic appears to be showing no sign of relenting with sales...
Sadiq Khan

Sadiq Khan cracks down on junk food ads as thinner children harder to stab

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Mayor plans to ban junk food adverts from Transport for London. Mayor of London, Sadiq Khan, today announced a plan to ban junk food adverts...
Surprised Santa

The Big Fat Secret Santa Appeal – 1,600 gifts bought in 48 hours

Two days ago we launched our Big Fat Secret Santa appeal with the wonderful guys and girls at NewsThump, Southend News Network, Angry People...

Downing Street orders all fans removed as Storm Stable hits UK

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Theresa May has ordered all fans removed from government premises immediately to limit the damage of Storm Stable. The storm is already sweeping across the...

Dipshit to argue with Thicko about terrible idea

A thicko has accepted a dipshit's challenge of a debate on the telly to sort of discuss how best to implement a dreadful idea. The...
Ann Widdecombe

Anne Widdecombe symbolically frees her slave

Following her first speech in the European Parliament, we have avoided the term 'maiden speech' as all her speeches are maiden, Anne Widdecombe has...

Panic grips nation as Britain realises Boris is in charge

Supermarkets across the land are fast running out of canned goods and bottled water and survivalist websites across the world are crashing as thousands...

“It’s time to take back control”, writes The Queen

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One's elected representatives are a complete shambles, One writes. One will not invite any of the proffered candidates to form a government. Instead one...

Alabama legislature confirms blacks still welcome to get abortions or be shot by police

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Emergency session of Alabama state legislature passes important exemption In an emergency session of the Alabama state legislature, State Senator Garlan Gudger proposed an amendment...

Panic across UK as white substance continues to fall from sky

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A state of emergency has been declared in a number of regions after a strange white substance fell from the sky recently. As councils...
Boris Johnson

For Fuck’s Sake, sighs Britain

The entire United Kingdom muttered "for fuck's sake" in unision yesterday afternoon after learning that Boris Johnson has been "elected: new Conservative leader and...

Britain First Supporters admit it’s a waste of time trying to change their opinions

Die hard Britain First members have today confirmed that there is absolutely no point in trying to get them to change their opinions by...

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