Panic grips nation as Britain realises Boris is in charge
Supermarkets across the land are fast running out of canned goods and bottled water and survivalist websites across the world are crashing as thousands...
Nick Clegg to run for leadership of Libdems
Nick Clegg has announced his intention of running for the leadership of the Liberal Democrats following the shock resignation of Tim Farron.
In a speech...
Farron leaving politics to watch VHS of “Brokeback Mountain” in mountains with friend
Tim Farron, Leader of the Liberal Democrats is set to resign his position after an embarrassing swing in his constituency, that saw him slimmly...
The Rochdale Herald’s top 10 tips for hating Meghan Markle
The Daily Mail and The Daily Express have today announced that Britons will be expected to devote as much as 14 hours a day...
Sadiq Khan cracks down on junk food ads as thinner children harder to stab
Mayor plans to ban junk food adverts from Transport for London.
Mayor of London, Sadiq Khan, today announced a plan to ban junk food adverts...
Firms reports record customer satisfaction levels after using cocaine delivery gang to deliver parcels
Delivery firms that specialise in not delivering your parcels have reported a huge increase in customer satisfaction levels.
The news comes following the companies use...
Queen’s speech delayed for halal vellum
"The ritualistic slaughter of goat is an essential pre-requisite for planned legislation in a parliamentary democracy." So said a spokesperson for 10 Downing Street...
Entire Tory Party arrested in clampdown on middle class cocaine users
The Conservative Party is facing a huge crisis today after its entire membership was arrested during a clampdown on middle class cocaine users.
PC Drug-Bust...
UK is an American Prison according to Alex Jones
The UK is a gigantic American prison according to balding conspiracist and radio gob Alex Jones- and Rochdale is the proof.
The 42 year old-...
Far Right groups threaten to tear down statues of Prophet Mohammed
Far right groups have pledged to tear down all statues of the Prophet Mohammed following the recent scoop in the Daily Express that the...
Democracy to be redefined “betterthedevilyaknowocracy”
The linguistic and lexicogaphical boffins at Oxford and Cambridge have agreed that the term democracy needs to be scrapped and replaced with something more...
Knob-head hand gesture at lowest levels since records began
A recent poll has revealed that this once loved insult has seen a sudden decline in use, and could be completely extinct by the...
Young people cause cancer Daily Mail warns
The Daily Mail has exclusively revealed that British youth is causing cancer.
In its article on the subject the Mail pointed out that British youths...
Big Fat Secret Santa Appeal – 2,329 Gifts bought in four days
Four days ago we launched our Big Fat Secret Santa appeal with the wonderful guys and girls at NewsThump, Southend News Network, Angry People...
Oven ready chicken refuses to leave fridge
Despite professing for weeks that he was much more oven ready than 'that Turkey Corbyn', the world's largest chicken has refused to leave a...
Cat who shit in litter tray lined with Daily Mail appointed editor
A cat who took a poo in a litter tray lined with a copy of the Daily Mail has been named as new editor...
