Downing Street

Shitheads get new jobs

London - A bunch of irrelevant shitheads all got new jobs today in London. Theresa May is currently reshuffling the pack of lizards who would...

GCSE Results Spell Success for Dyslexic Pupils

Students at Maple Hayes Dyslexia Scool in Lichfield have been celebrating incredible GCSE exam success. While many students couldn't read or write when they first...

Harry and Meghan to take holiday from going on holiday

The palace has revealed this morning that plans are in place to give the Duke and Duchess of Sussex a well deserved break from...
Scientist

Scientists warn firing Formula 1 grid girls will lead to increase in race related...

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Science - In a leaked Sport England research paper, several sports scientists have warned over the removal of the usual checks and balances deployed...

Britain buoyed by approval of Autumn Olympics

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There were wild scenes of celebration from keen athletics fans up and down the UK this morning, as the head of the Seasonal Olympics...

Trump to produce new range of fragrances

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Donald Trump is to collaborate with daughter Ivanka to produce a new range of perfumes. The first daughter said "This new range reflects...

Coroner rules man killed by falling trophy cabinet victim of his own success

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The verdict has been returned by the inquest into the tragic death of Will Winnet. The coroner Dr Howie Perished has ruled he was...

Chuka Umunna banned from Coventry Laser Quest for crashing children’s parties

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MP for Streatham, Chuka Umunna, has been forcibly removed from a branch of Laser Quest in Coventry for reportedly trying to join numerous children's...

Tory membership livid at Leadsom withdrawal

Tory Party Members up and down the country are reported to be livid that the withdrawal of Andrea Leadsom has robbed them of their...

Leave voters insist on still paying mobile roaming charges

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"What has the EU ever done for us?" Biff Bifshop demanded. Draped in a St George flag and holding a readiness to perform fellatio on...

Labour, the Social DEMOCRATIC Party, takes more steps to prevent undesirables from voting

The National Executive Committee of the Labour Party has announced today that only those to the right of Tony Blair will be permitted to...
Dinner party group

Local woman wins award for most middle class comment 2016

A local woman has won Rochdale's coveted "Most Middle Class Comment 2016" at a dinner party this weekend. Barbara Dickinson was attending a dinner party...

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