Team GB get the Trotts
Charlotte Dujardin became the second woman to win three Olympic gold medals today when she came first in the "Horse Dancing" contest this afternoon. A "close personal friend" of cyclist Laura Trott, who became...
Trump accused of damaging reputation of fat, racist golfers everywhere
Donald Trump has been asked to give up golf as he is tarnishing its reputation and attracting the wrong type of people into the game. Fat, white, affluent, vaguely racist, middle-aged golfers are appalled...
Actual grown up man wins race around France on child’s toy
An actual grown up man has won a really long race around France on a children's toy.
The Team Sky rider from Cardiff, Geraint Thomas, became the first Welshman to win something after crossing the...
Rooney: taking are cuntry bak
As the second half of the Manchester derby got underway, reports were coming in that Wayne Rooney had joined Britain First.
During the halftime team talk, United manager Jose Mourinho told simpleton, Rooney, "I want...
England ready for Adelaide Ashes Test
Ahead of the second Ashes Test which has just started in Adelaide, England captain Joe Root sought to defuse the simmering tension between the two sides by holding a joint press conference with his...
Private school fury as ‘dirty pints’ banned for 16 year old rugby players
Plans to ban the enforced necking of dirty pints for under 16s rugby players have been widely criticised.
The ruling by HSE is thought to have followed on from the proposed banning of...
Nuttall to captain UK Olympic waterboarding team
UKIP party leader, former archbishop of Canterbury, Duke of Edinburgh in Waiting and Huddersfield Town striker, Paul Nuttall has been named as the captain of the UK's waterboarding team for the 2020...
‘My dour Scots personality is actually a total fanny magnet’ claims Andy Murray
Racquetball superstar Andy Murray today spoke of how his charisma-free personality brings all the girls to his yard.
Murray, whose public speaking manner is so mind-numbingly tedious that renowned impressionist Alastair MacGowan famously fell asleep...
The Rochdale Herald’s Top Ten Tips for Real Supporters and True Football Fans
In honour of signing world famous football man Neville Southall to the Rochdale Herald, here are our top ten tips for real supporters and true football fans.
Go football men!
1- Buy your special football...
Brazilian kidnappers fail to understand British man’s relationship with mother-in-law
Bernie Ecclestone is said to have received the news of his mother-in-law's kidnap with mixed emotions this morning
In an exclusive interview with the Rochdale Herald this afternoon he told us;
"It's not everyday that you...
Venus Williams says most recent car insurance quote inspired her Wimbledon run
Venus Williams has revealed that she was inspired to her Wimbledon final appearance by her most recent car insurance quote.
Speaking after finishing runner up, Ms Williams 37, told the Herald,
"Yeah it's good right now....
British public excited by boxing match between two men they wouldn’t want to move...
British boxing fans spent much of the night anticipating and then watching a bout between black fighter Deontay Wilder and half-Irish gypsy Tyson Fury.
Fight fan Dave Cooper, from Romford, said "I'm a bit confused...
Canoeist wins Olympic Gold for canoeing
A canoeist fulfilled a lifetime's ambition last night after winning Olympic Gold for Britain in Rio.
The Rochdale Herald would like to congratulate the canoeist who won a medal alongside fellow Olympian Tom Daley, who...
Brownlee Brothers win World Three Legged Race Championship
British superstars Jonny and Alister Brownlee were today crowned world 3 legged triathlon race champions in a nail biting finish in Mexico.
Although crossing the line behind the South Africans they were credited the win...
Team GB to announce Stable Door Shutting as new olympic sport
Team GB are set to announce that "Stable Door Shutting" will become an Olympic sport, The Rochdale Herald has learned.
Following the UK government's announcement that perhaps it might not be a bad idea if...
John Inverdale to host ‘Dog Toy or Sex Toy’ at Wimbledon this year
The BBC have announced that John Inverdale will present a dog toy or sextoy game during rain delays at this year's Wimbledon championships.
The move comes amidst concerns that the BBC couldn't screen an impromptu Cliff Richard...