Dogs will be allowed on the Pitch during the World Cup in Russia
Man's best friend can now get even closer to the World Cup action. As Dogs will be allowed on the field during World Cup...
Norway’s female football team found in cocaine-fuelled strip club romp
Just hours after the Norwegian football association ruled that female footballer's pay must be brought in line with that of the men's, the entire...
God shows that he hates Cristiano Ronaldo and Argentina
God has revealed that he absolutely cannot stand Cristiano Ronaldo so he chose to favour Uruguay in yesterday's last 16 game.
God or, The Word...
England team reveal plan to completely disappoint everyone is going smoothly
Gareth Southgate has revealed that his plan to completely disappoint loads of English people is going exactly according to plan.
At a press conference Southgate...
East London Charity Shops on standby to get loads of West Ham training kit...
East London charity shops are preparing for a bumper delivery of training kit and promotional items after West Ham appointed David Moyes to their...
BT and Sky TV will not allow Nuclear Winter Premiership break
Sky TV and BT TV have both announced that the current Premier League TV rights deal precludes top-tier football a break in the event...
New EU rules send shock waves through the terraces
New EU rules are set to send shock waves through the football terraces of the UK.
According to sources close to the FA, the...
FIFA rejects World Cup draw rigging allegations after Russia selected to play against Russia
FIFA have been forced to defend more allegations of corruption after the 2018 World Cup hosts, Russia, were selected to play against themselves in...
Foreigners with British citizenship MUST support England in the football, IT’S THE LAW
A Brazilian woman and her South African friend, who have both recently attained British citizenship, have been reported to the authorities after announcing that...
Wales Seeks Independence as Gareth Bale Doubles Welsh GDP
Carwyn Jones has changed his mind on Welsh Independence after Gareth Bale’s new contract doubled the GDP of Wales.
Police and HMRC raid Arsenal after silver polish claim on VAT return
More tax scandal has hit the Premier League last night after police swooped on the Arsenal stadium after they tried to claim the VAT...
Queen gives blessing for Meghan to marry Prince Harry
The Queen has signalled her approval for Meghan Markle to marry Prince Harry Kane.
Despite her recent wedding to that "Bastard" (sic) ginger grandson of...
Rooney: taking are cuntry bak
As the second half of the Manchester derby got underway, reports were coming in that Wayne Rooney had joined Britain First.
During the halftime team...
Belgian football riot shows EU is hungry for UK exports says Liam Fox
A football riot at a Belgian football match between Anderlecht and Club Brugge demonstrates the hunger for British exports according to Liam Fox.
In a...
Spurs reassure loyal fans with plan to be shit again by the weekend
Tottenham Hotspur, commonly referred to simply as Tottenham, Spurs, or a word that you really can’t use in an article these days for fear...
David White follows The Rochdale Herald on Twitter
The editorial team were said to be jubilant at the news this evening that former England, Leeds and Manchester City centre forward David White...
