TFL confirms London Underground to be extended to Scotland by 2021
London's continued plans to absorb the entirety of Great Britain into the never ending tentacles of its grotesque boundaries were handed a huge boost...
Pret A Manger have successfully poisoned more people this year than Vladimir Putin
Pret a Manger have successfully poisoned more people in Britain in 2017-2018 than Vladimir Putin according to sources within the GRU.
The news comes after...
British Company Based In Britain Backs Britain
Brexiters across the land are jubilantly crying "We told you so!" after GlaxoSmithKline, a UK company, based in the UK, that wanted the UK...
Man ‘still hip’ because he likes new bands like Radiohead
Derek Brasshouse, 54, an accountant in Rochdale Borough Council's swimming pool department, considers himself to be still 'with it' because he enjoys new bands...
Britain free from the ‘shackles of Brussels’ as it adopts every European law
Britain is going to reclaim its sovereignty and make itself great again by sticking two fingers up at Europe and adopting every law and...
Do we really, really, really have to go out, asks everyone
Everybody in the UK has collectively asked if they really, really, really have to go out now that they've gone through the fun bit...
Brian Cox Announced As New President Of Flat Earth Society
Both the scientific and pseudo-scientific communities express a modicum of shock as tousle-haired synth-pop supremo and thinking housewives favourite Professor Brian Cox is sworn...
Paul Nuttall resigns as Archbishop of Canterbury
In a shock move Thursday Paul Nuttall, Member of the European Parliament for North West England EP and leader of the United Kingdom Independence...
Donald Trump costumes selling out faster than Kim Jong Un disguises this Halloween
Once again the time of year when all the ghouls and monsters come out to play is upon us.
But enough about the tete-a-tete...
Loud booing interrupted by Boris Johnson speech
Millions of viewers who tuned into a BBC broadcast of tens of thousands of people booing and hissing at Downing Street today were left...
Blair to build fantasy superhero based theme park Blair World in central London
Amid all the depressing news at the moment, spirits of Londoners have been lifted by some entertainment news. Tony Blair has announced he will...
Christians, Muslims, Satanists Opposed To Pokemon Go
Following the UK release of Pokemon Go ten days ago, several prominent spokespersons for leading UK religious organisations have spoken out, condemning the game...
One in four NHS hospitals have turned to STRIPPING to make ends meet
Almost a quarter of the nation's hospitals have turned to stripping to make up for funding shortfalls, according to a new report.
Commissioned by a...
999 rescue for man who misunderstood the meaning of ‘rape robot’
A dramatic and embarrassing rescue involving two fire engines and four police cars was underway this morning, after one man failed to realise his...
Paul Dacre hospitalised with stress after English Muslim cricketer wins man of the match...
Caught between "Moeen Ali spins England to victory!" and "Fury as Muslim immigrant takes YOUR place in the ENGLAND cricket team", the Daily Mail's...
My kids weren’t vaccinated and the one who didn’t die is okay says anti-vaxxer
Tracy O'Daffy of Middleton is heading a campaign to raise awareness of the dangers of vaccination throughout the Rochdale area.
Tracy has been a long...
