Local man feels a right twat after putting his back out in the gym
Local man Steve Dickinson (39 and a half) put his back out this morning in the gym whilst trying to get fit for a...
Put a top on, you’re not Poldark man told.
A Rochdale man has been told to put a top on whilst he does the gardening as he's in no danger of ever being...
DNA analysis of white poo on Rochdale street reveals that it comes from a...
Experts tracking down rogue dog owners in Rochdale came up with the shocking news that prehistoric species are alive and kicking. What's more, the...
Thousands come together for eye testing
Thousands of people have come together in the name of ophthalmic health this weekend. Many even brought their own testing kits.
One attendee told us,...
Wife suspects husband of having an affair with his shed
A wife has begun to suspect her husband of having an affair with his shed.
“He was the most doting husband when we first married,”...
Pretentious Burnley couple having a thanksgiving dinner can’t understand why nobody’s coming
A Rochdale family have been telling The Rochdale Herald how a Burnley couple have invited them to Thanksgiving dinner tonight.
Professor Frederick Seddon of Rochdale...
Police Commissioner Confirms Police To Desist From Arresting People Doing Nothing Wrong
South Yorkshire Police Commissioner Adam Spillings went on record today as saying his force would no longer be arresting tree campaigners for doing nothing...
Rochdale Herald issues cease and desist warning against The Southend News Network
The editorial department at The Rochdale Herald was in uproar this afternoon after one of the biggest names in satirical local news blatantly ripped...
Hot Deals in Rochdale Black Friday Price Crash! – Don’t miss out!
Rochdale is going nuts this Friday with MEGA DEALS accross the town centre. Grab a bargain, they're giving it away.
LITERALLY!
-Head down to your local...
Farage exposed as Russian “mole”, according to Rochdale medium
Rochdale medium Mrs Isadore Goggins today revealed that Nigel Farage is a Russian mole bent on destroying the UK, the EU and the US.
The news was...
Gerry Anderson to Return as String Puppet
Die-hard Thunderbirds fans are celebrating the surprise announcement that Gerry Anderson is to headline the upcoming Cromer 60s Festival.
North Norfolk District Council broke the...
20 injured by lion at Rochdale pride march
There were scenes of carnage yesterday after a lion got loose and mauled several people at the annual Rochdale Pride event.
One eye witness said,...
Attenborough spotted in Rochdale as folk turn primitive
Residents of Rochdale coming to terms with the swear ban are having to learn how to communicate from scratch.
Restricted from their usual expletive fuelled...
Grandparent babysitting for half term wonders “Is it too early for a drink?” Monday...
A grandparent who nonchalantly offered to babysit for the entire half term week has already wondered if it's too early for a drink?
Granny Syllable,...
Rochdale porn shop raider beaten off with sex toy
In a bizarre turn of events at Rochdale's number one marital aid retailer, Coxfam, a robbery was foiled when a masked intruder was beaten...
Danczuk Less Popular than standing in dog shit
Here at the Herald we've seen numerous "news" sources state that Britain's answer to Donald Trump has considerable support amongst Labour Party members. We somehow...
