Psychic wins EuroMillions for sixth week running
A Rochdale based psychic has won the Euromillions lottery for the sixth week running.
In an interview conducted 7 weeks ago Psychic Islet told us,...
Christmas lunch already ruined after Grandma forgets to start cooking sprouts before end November
A Rochdale family has had to cancel Christmas this year after Grandma admitted that she had forgotten to start cooking the sprouts in November.
Pamela...
The Beckhams ditch L.A for glorious Rochdale
Today the Herald can exclusively reveal the jaw dropping news that the world's biggest star, glamour model, fashion icon, tireless charity worker and one...
Rochdale Infirmary to Trial Office Hours
Due to severe cut backs, Rochdale Infirmary is to trial working office hours only. This is a first in the UK since the inception...
Rochdale spies suffer eye strain after being exposed to local man’s tackle
Two of Rochdale's well known top secret spies were today recovering in Specsavers after local man, Fred Higglesworth, exposed himself after drinking ten pints...
Burnley schoolgirl goes whole term without getting pregnant
The leader of Burnley council has called for calm today, after it was revealed a Burnley schoolgirl went an entire term without becoming pregnant.
Eric...
Elderly Leave voter mistakes Hovis advert for childhood memories
An elderly leave voter has been telling the Herald about his childhood and it's very similar to the Hovis advert.
Roy Bader, 72, who's never...
I’ve just made a life size jelly of Donald Trump, I fear I may...
“You have to send help.” Dr Thump implored the emergency operator. “If this jelly gets out of my fridge there is no telling what it will do. It might start a nuclear war or worse.”
Put a top on, you’re not Poldark man told.
A Rochdale man has been told to put a top on whilst he does the gardening as he's in no danger of ever being...
Sheffield Tree-Felling Councillor Hospitalised With Irony Overdose
It has been revealed that Clr Brian 'Hodge' Podge, the Sheffield Councillor responsible for the hugely unpopular street tree felling programme, was rushed to...
Fluffy kitten is a double hard bastard
An adorably fluffy little kitten from Bury has confirmed he is a double hard bastard who is not to be trifled with.
13 week old...
Unnamed Rochdale MP to be charged with being drunk in charge of a mobility...
An as yet unnamed MP for Rochdale has allegedly been arrested for being drunk in charge of a mobility scooter.
Police were called in the...
Corner shop owner lynched by mob in Rochdale after caught selling Yorkshire Tea
Marge Riley, 74, was confronted by an angry mob of local residents who objected to her display of Yorkshire Teas.
“I just wanted to give...
Rochdale Good Name Besmirched By Internet Trolls
The city of Rochdale was left reeling and in shock once again today as internet trolls took it upon themselves to deface an iconic...
Baby carefully planning most inconvenient moment to shit himself
A newborn baby is deliberately planning the most inconvenient time to either shit himself or start screaming for no reason.
Lancashire-born newborn dickhead Barry Dickinson...
Child taken from mother after being forced to live as a Tory
A seven-year-old boy from Rochdale who had been "living life entirely as a Tory" has been taken from his mother's care following a High...




















































