I’ve just made a life size jelly of Donald Trump, I fear I may...
“You have to send help.” Dr Thump implored the emergency operator. “If this jelly gets out of my fridge there is no telling what it will do. It might start a nuclear war or worse.”
Terror as trick or treaters turn out to be political canvassers
A Rochdale man has today been speaking about his ordeal at the hands to some political canvassers he mistook for trick or treaters.
Bill Board...
EXCLUSIVE: PIPPA MIDDLETON TOPLESS PHOTOS BREAK INTERNET
Still recovering from the profound damage caused by that picture of Kim Kardashian's arse a while back, the Interweb was dealt yet another bitter...
Man who refers to himself as an ‘alpha-male’ actually just a dickhead
A man from Rochdale who refers to himself as an 'alpha-male' is in fact just a bit of a dickead sources have revealed.
The news...
Well I’ve never caught anything off my kids before, Facebook mum lies
Before 2020, Rochdale mum Di Coughlan had rarely posted anything other than pictures of her adorable children and grimacing husband. That all changed a...
US Government admits covering up red alert over imminent asteroid impact
Scientists and Government sources have confirmed that the giant asteroid, 2016-FI is on course to strike the Northern Hemisphere after initial uncertainty about it's...
Rochdale man finds his keys in the first place he looks
In an incredible turn of events a local Rochdale man found his keys in the first place he looked for them this afternoon.
Steve Dickinson,...
Child taken from mother after being forced to live as a Tory
A seven-year-old boy from Rochdale who had been "living life entirely as a Tory" has been taken from his mother's care following a High...
Manchester tram ‘spontaneous combustion’ victim named
Commuters were left stunned this morning when Londoner Harry Turner spontaneously burst into flames aboard a Manchester tram.
The tragedy occurred after he was forced...
Husband fails to avoid loaded question
A Rochdale man is currently receiving counselling and treatment for first-degree burns after failing to give the correct answer to a blatantly loaded question...
20 injured by lion at Rochdale pride march
There were scenes of carnage yesterday after a lion got loose and mauled several people at the annual Rochdale Pride event.
One eye witness said,...
Stereotyping men now a hate crime: Rochdale cracks down on Misandry
Several women were arrested this morning following a verbal altercation outside Rochdale's women's institute.The women who can't be named for legal reasons are being...
Rochdale Herald editor drowns in tragic Daily Mail tractor accident
In an incident uncannily similar to the fate of controversial media proprietor, Robert Maxwell, who apparently drowned after falling from his private yacht, an...
Rochdale women clubbing dressed in police tape
Fashionable Rochdale women have found a rather special use for police tape - as clothing to hit the town in.
Local artist and bin man,...
Rochdale trolley collector quits job, anaesthetises pigeon and cuts off let to pursue career...
A Rochdale man has today spoken exclusively to the Herald about his short-lived career as a pirate.
Captain Lidl Beard had been working as a...
Stockport Town Centre awarded UNESCO World Heritage status
There were celebrations the length of Heaton Moor to Hazel Grove yesterday, as UNESCO officials announced Stockport Town Centre is to become a World...
