Fury as Brexit voter can’t get tee off time at Golf Club he isn’t...
Local Brexit voter, Steve Dickinson, is said to be furious with Manchester Golf Club after discovering he can't get the tee off times he wants since letting his membership lapse.
Bearded men tagged in record number of “beard decoration” pictures
Bearded men around the country joined together in a collective shudder yesterday as they were tagged in yet more increasingly irritating, abysmal and completely...
Man attends Halloween party dressed as cyclist
A Rochdale man has won a Halloween fancy dress competition after turning up dressed as a cyclist. Bill Board, 35 arrived at pal Stan...
Getting pissed and setting off fireworks near children is dangerous, experts warn
Dickheads armed with fireworks have been urged to “please not kill anyone” this bonfire night, as it emerged how pissing about with explosives after...
Local Entrepreneur Makes Big Hit On Dragon’s Den
Local businessman Vinnie 'Fingers' McPherson entered the big league in the world of high finance today when his appearance on TV's popular Dragon's Den show took...
Christmas lunch already ruined after Grandma forgets to start cooking sprouts before end November
A Rochdale family has had to cancel Christmas this year after Grandma admitted that she had forgotten to start cooking the sprouts in November.
Pamela...
Smug Husband packs Christmas shop into fridge
A smug father of two from Bolton has taken the plaudits of his close friends and family as he managed to pack away all...
Many Muslims not rioting in streets
The Rochdale Herald learned today that almost two billion Muslims around the world went about their daily business without perpetuating a single crime, let...
Child believes summers are warm and England are good at football
Worrying news reaches us from a Rochdale suburb of a child who has not yet learned the truth
There are certain core truths you learn...
It’s too damn hot to write satire says satirist
Dick Turnip, writer for the Rochdale Herald, has been left unable to write a single humorous thing commenting on, or parodying the day's news.
"It's...
Burnley schoolgirl goes whole term without getting pregnant
The leader of Burnley council has called for calm today, after it was revealed a Burnley schoolgirl went an entire term without becoming pregnant.
Eric...
Rochdale’s Brickcroft Lane Social Club unveil The Danczuk Memorial Bin
It has taken years of diligent campaigning and endless hours of tough negotiating but finally Simon Danczuk has achieved something material for the citizens...
Man who’s spent last 4 years banging on about Blitz Spirit buys 70 bottles...
A Rochdale resident who regularly invokes the Blitz Spirit has been out an panic bought 70 bottles of hand sanitizer today.
Bill Board regularly greets...
Twat ruins barbecue with guitar
Reports are coming in that a twat has ruined a perfectly serviceable barbecue after finding an old guitar next to a sofa in the...
War of the Roses: The Rematch
Rochdalians reacted with righteous fury over news of what is seen at best as an aggressive land grab and, at worst, a declaration of...
Christmas Miracle declared after BMW driver regains sight after parking in disabled spots
A Christmas Miracle has been declared after a disabled man was completely cured after parking his BMW across two handicapped parking bays at Rochdale Waitrose.




















































