Wife suspects husband of having an affair with his shed

10
A wife has begun to suspect her husband of having an affair with his shed. “He was the most doting husband when we first married,”...

Chinese space station crashes into Burnley causing £12-50 worth of damage

0
The Tiangong-1 Chinese space station that has been out of control since 2016 finally crashed down to Earth in the early hours of Monday...

Home Office Play Matchmaker for Rochdale’s Bridget Joneses

0
The Rochdale Herald can reveal controversial Home Office plans to settle new male immigrants in areas of Britain with too many single women in...

Russian Athletes urine has street value of £2,000 per fluid ounce 

0
Forget crack, heroin, spice and cannabis the latest drug to hit the streets of Rochdale is quite literally taking the piss.  The liquid shot called...

Rochdale council ban nativity costumes except for Muslims

0
The education department in Rochdale county council has issued a blanket memo to all schools for "insensitive fancy dress" for nativity plays.

Dead burglar to get state funeral

0
A Rochdale burglar who was killed whilst at work will receive a state funeral.  Councillor Tom Walsh said, "This man wasn't any old burgular. He...

Trading Standards to prosecute Gastro Pub for using plates

34
A new gastro pub, The Pissed Idiot, in Rochdale is under investigation by trading standards after allegedly serving food on actual plates rather than...

Hull favourite for Turner prize for ironic depiction of City of Culture

35
Kingston Upon Hull has been tipped by the bookies to win the Turner Prize for Irony this year. The famed port city and its people...
Trump Flag

I’ve just made a life size jelly of Donald Trump, I fear I may...

17
“You have to send help.” Dr Thump implored the emergency operator. “If this jelly gets out of my fridge there is no telling what it will do. It might start a nuclear war or worse.”
Doctors

Rochdale A+E under stress from record levels of chafing

0
A + E departments and walk in clinics are struggling to deal with thousands of cases of extreme chafing caused by the hot weather. John Welsby...

Home Worker facing HR disciplinary hearing after sexually assaulting himself at work Christmas Party

0
A home worker from Rochdale is facing a disciplinary hearing today after he allegedly sexually assaulted himself after getting drunk at his office Christmas...
Hose Pipe Bans

3rd Day of Sunshine sees Hose Pipe Bans Across UK

0
As the heatwave currently hitting the UK enters its third day water companies across Britain have enforced hose pipe bans once again. Despite months of...
Burnley Teenager

Burnley schoolgirl goes whole term without getting pregnant

0
The leader of Burnley council has called for calm today, after it was revealed a Burnley schoolgirl went an entire term without becoming pregnant. Eric...
theresa nay laughing

Theresa May to communicate Brexit deal using dance

0
Theresa May will communicate the UK's Brexit plan to the House of Commons later today using the medium of dance. One insider told us, "The...
bbq

Twat ruins barbecue with guitar

Reports are coming in that a twat has ruined a perfectly serviceable barbecue after finding an old guitar next to a sofa in the...

Man thrown out of vegan cult for wearing donkey jacket

There was outrage in the Burnley hemp weaving community today after a man was expelled from his local vegetarian cult for wearing a donkey...

Follow us

61,169FansLike
29,631FollowersFollow
21,670FollowersFollow

Popular Posts