Husband fails to avoid loaded question
A Rochdale man is currently receiving counselling and treatment for first-degree burns after failing to give the correct answer to a blatantly loaded question...
Dead burglar to get state funeral
A Rochdale burglar who was killed whilst at work will receive a state funeral.
Councillor Tom Walsh said, "This man wasn't any old burgular. He...
Google breaks under search query strain after hot weekend
Google breaks under the strain of millions of Britons preparing their excuses for work on Monday morning.
As millions of us check up on the...
Man Dressed As Batman Chasing Man Dressed As Clown Captured By Man Dressed As...
Rochdale Town Centre, and a man dressed as Batman who has been spotted in the locale chasing a man dressed as a Killer Clown...
Hull favourite for Turner prize for ironic depiction of City of Culture
Kingston Upon Hull has been tipped by the bookies to win the Turner Prize for Irony this year.
The famed port city and its people...
Local luxury goods firm goes bust
High end retailer, Lewis Veeton Moway, has closed its doors for the last time, citing poor sales despite a massive promotional campaign.
Rupert Cholmondley-Featherstonehaugh, the...
It’s too damn hot to write satire says satirist
Dick Turnip, writer for the Rochdale Herald, has been left unable to write a single humorous thing commenting on, or parodying the day's news.
"It's...
Rochdale Police Find ‘Lost’ Horse in semi rural area
Reports from GMP Rochdale are somewhat vague to say the least, so the minimum we can assume from the information supplied is the horse is somewhere...
Elderly Leave voter mistakes Hovis advert for childhood memories
An elderly leave voter has been telling the Herald about his childhood and it's very similar to the Hovis advert.
Roy Bader, 72, who's never...
UKIP Apologises For Not Knowing What Obvious Means
UKIP were forced to admit today that big words like "joke" and "obvious" are generally beyond their grasp.
The announcement came after a social media...
Man arrested masturbating outside Primark not Simon Danczuk
Rumours were circulating around the editorial bunker yesterday that the man arrested for masturbating outside of Primark was local pornography enthusiast Simon Danczuk.
Despite getting...
Woman shocked everything is fine after being told everything will be fine
A Rochdale woman was surprised to learn that everything was fine despite being told by her husband "it'll be fine" 400 times a day...
EXCLUSIVE: PIPPA MIDDLETON TOPLESS PHOTOS BREAK INTERNET
Still recovering from the profound damage caused by that picture of Kim Kardashian's arse a while back, the Interweb was dealt yet another bitter...
Sheffield councillors flummoxed By Spade and Pick Conundrum
Sheffield councillors visiting a street improvement site were utterly bamboozled when contractors lined up three spades against a wall and invited the councillors to...
My cats are like my children, says woman whose cat raped stranger in bush...
A woman whose cats regularly rape strangers in bushes on nights out has insisted that her cats are like her children.
Part time hairdresser Barbara...
Eager traffic tyrant issuing parking fines willy-nilly in the town
Disgruntled shopper Eileen McCarthy nipped into Poundland around lunchtime on Friday leaving her tartan bag on wheels parked up on the kerbside.
To her dismay...




















































