Kitten

Fluffy kitten is a double hard bastard

0
An adorably fluffy little kitten from Bury has confirmed he is a double hard bastard who is not to be trifled with. 13 week old...

Man arrested masturbating outside Primark not Simon Danczuk

2
Rumours were circulating around the editorial bunker yesterday that the man arrested for masturbating outside of Primark was local pornography enthusiast Simon Danczuk. Despite getting...

Miracle Declared As TK Maxx Customer Finds Acceptable Pair Of Jeans

1
A TK Maxx customer in Rochdale has described his purchase of a pair of jeans that look acceptable and fit perfectly as “nothing short...
Children At Christmas

Only 4 more Prime Ministers until Christmas, say children

0
Excitement at a Rochdale school is building after pupils discovered there are only 4 more Prime Ministers until Christmas. One teacher at the Robert Mugabe...

World hunger solved after Jeremy Corbyn urinates on field

0
World hunger has been declared over after Jeremy Corbyn urinated on a field just outside Rochdale. One aide told us, "Jeremy was returning from one...

Home Worker facing HR disciplinary hearing after sexually assaulting himself at work Christmas Party

0
A home worker from Rochdale is facing a disciplinary hearing today after he allegedly sexually assaulted himself after getting drunk at his office Christmas...
Plain wooden coffin

Funeral business booming thanks to Tory policy

0
Funeral services are enjoying an unprecedented rise in trade thanks to the reforms in disability benefits and the selling off of NHS services. Although ATOS, the...
Christmas Morning

Man thanked for countless gifts he had no knowledge of purchasing

0
A man has been repeatedly thanked and kissed by family and friends for Christmas presents he was unaware of purchasing, despite paying for every...
Snow on trees

Rochdale Council to vote on plan to colour snow

0
Rochdale Council are to consider a plan to colour snow to make it more representative of the cultural mix of the area. The Rochdale Multi-Cultural...
Hose Pipe Bans

3rd Day of Sunshine sees Hose Pipe Bans Across UK

0
As the heatwave currently hitting the UK enters its third day water companies across Britain have enforced hose pipe bans once again. Despite months of...

Gay traffic lights turn pavements to mince

0
Transport for London have overstepped the mark by introducing gay traffic lights according to Rochdale father of two, Arthur Branesell. "Its outrageous! There's one with...

SHOCK as cocaine bought in Rochdale nightclub found to contain trace amounts of COCAINE

0
Local man Geoff Addy was out partying in Rochdale's premier night club, Kokos, on Saturday for his mate John Bullington's abortion party, when he...

Black death condemned for being racist

0
Traditional remedies, like bleeding and mercury, have proved ineffective. Complementary therapists have suggested vaccination, but have been dismissed by mothers who prefer their infants to die naturally rather than to become autistic church goers.

Well I’ve never caught anything off my kids before, Facebook mum lies

0
Before 2020, Rochdale mum Di Coughlan had rarely posted anything other than pictures of her adorable children and grimacing husband.  That all changed a...

Harvey Weinstein is a Democrat is the new Hitler was a Vegetarian

5
Hip new fashy fashion hits Brownhill School All the coolest kids in Brownhill School, Rochdale, have adopted it.  “Yeah well, Harvey Weinstein was a Democrat so...

Restaurants that don’t use proper plates just twats, says everyone

0
The growing trend for eateries to use ridiculous items to serve your food on is now becoming a serious issue as local pottery firm...

Follow us

61,169FansLike
29,631FollowersFollow
21,670FollowersFollow

Popular Posts