Local News

The rest of the UK today approved a bypass scheme for Rochdale. Using an EU grant while it is still available, the plan entails...

Rochdale Council are to consider a plan to colour snow to make it more representative of the cultural mix of the area. The Rochdale Multi-Cultural...

Sheffield council yesterday accepted they had fundamentally misunderstood the concept of 'socialism'.  Following a vehement rejection by local residents of their plan to cut down...

The Rochdale Herald learned today that almost two billion Muslims around the world went about their daily business without perpetuating a single crime, let...

The British Council For Drinking More Beer (BCFDMB) rolled out their latest advertising initiative, a series of billboard posters to be prominently displayed in...

Manchester residents are delighted that their rituals to the Rain God have worked and banished the burning eye that brings only searing skin pain. Dr...

Local man Steve Dickinson (39 and a half) put his back out this morning in the gym whilst trying to get fit for a...

At approximately one o'clock this afternoon emergency services were dispatched to the Cooperative convenience store in Middleton. The initial response was to investigate a...

A local woman is said to be furious to discover that she isn't actually OCD. "I clean the floor and hoover the curtains three times...

“You have to send help.” Dr Thump implored the emergency operator. “If this jelly gets out of my fridge there is no telling what it will do. It might start a nuclear war or worse.”

Still recovering from the profound damage caused by that picture of Kim Kardashian's arse a while back, the Interweb was dealt yet another bitter...

Cannabis plants have been uncovered at 'Bright Horizons' home for the elderly, Kirkholt, this morning. Police describe the haul as a kick in the...

In an incredible turn of events a local Rochdale man found his keys in the first place he looked for them this afternoon. Steve Dickinson,...

Forget crack, heroin, spice and cannabis the latest drug to hit the streets of Rochdale is quite literally taking the piss.  The liquid shot called...

A resident of East Lancashire village Potterby has said that he is furious that the government has ignored Potterby when allocating accommodation for Syrian...

World hunger has been declared over after Jeremy Corbyn urinated on a field just outside Rochdale. One aide told us, "Jeremy was returning from one...