The Increasingly Poor Decisions of Simon Danczuk

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It's been a fairly typical week for Rochdale's "MP" after he found himself at the centre of another embarrassing shit storm. In another in a...

Only 6 sleeps until poppy day, fascist children told

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The children of Fascists have been conveying their excitement at there only being 6 more sleeps until poppy day. 7 year old Bill Board said,...

Euro TV Satellite expected to fall on Rochdale: “Nothing to fear” say boffins

28.2E Astra2/Eurobird1 may not mean anything to most people, but it is very much in the minds of worried Rochdale residents who have recently...

Iconic Rochdale Bridge Reopens

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An iconic Rochdale landmark built in the 14th Century has reopened after it was obscured from the public for over a hundred years. The bridge over the river Roch in heart of Rochdale's town centre was partly obliterated in a terrorist incident in 1903, and then paved over to make way for Rochdale's pioneering new tram network.

Smallbridge Flats Man Convinced Pigeon Likes to Watch him Hoover Naked

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While spending a good portion of his weekly income on the Euromillions, Mr. Garry Lee Shaw complained about the fifth or even sixth time...

GMP Rochdale Plan Devolving Police Powers

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A plan to devolve police powers in Rochdale has been given the green light. This will be the biggest shakeup in policing since since...

DNA analysis of white poo on Rochdale street reveals that it comes from a...

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Experts tracking down rogue dog owners in Rochdale came up with the shocking news that prehistoric species are alive and kicking. What's more, the...

Rochdale woman drinks Gin Advent Calendar on Saturday night

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A Rochdale woman has woken today and realised that she spent last night drinking all the Gin in her Fever-Tree Ultimate Gin Advent Calendar. Orla...

Man saying all lives matter wants Navy to torpedo boats full of refugees

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A Rochdale man who keeps saying that all lives matter is also in favour of the Royal Navy being used to torpedo boats carrying...

Local Liberal Claims To Only Visit Daily Mail Website For The Tits And Ass

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Rochdale liberal Gerard Sutherland has told his wife that he only visits the Daily Mail website for the Z-list 'celebrity' tits and ass, and...

Manchester residents perform ceremony to bring rain back

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Manchester residents are delighted that their rituals to the Rain God have worked and banished the burning eye that brings only searing skin pain. Dr...
Rochdale Riverside

Rochdale unaffected by US Government shutdown confirms Council chief

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Rochdale - The leader of Rochdale Borough Council, Councillor Allen Brett, has reassured residents of the town that they won't be affected by the...

Rochdale Twin Towns To Be Replaced Post-Brexit

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In line with the decision taken by the government that following the UK's departure from the EU, British towns will no longer be allowed...

Liberal hospitalised after catching racism from Daily Mail

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A Rochdale man has been admitted to a psychiatric hospital today after contracting racism from a close encounter with the Daily Mail.  Colin Nigelsson, a...

Anti-Vaxxer has very messy carpet

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In an ironic twist that would give Alanis Morissette a run for her money, local Anti-Vaxx campaigner Tarquin O'Flerfer is reported to have a...

Man thrown out of vegan cult for wearing donkey jacket

There was outrage in the Burnley hemp weaving community today after a man was expelled from his local vegetarian cult for wearing a donkey...

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