Really clean woman furious with ‘Not OCD’ diagnosis

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A local woman is said to be furious to discover that she isn't actually OCD. "I clean the floor and hoover the curtains three times...

Man thrown out of vegan cult for wearing donkey jacket

There was outrage in the Burnley hemp weaving community today after a man was expelled from his local vegetarian cult for wearing a donkey...

Well I’ve never caught anything off my kids before, Facebook mum lies

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Before 2020, Rochdale mum Di Coughlan had rarely posted anything other than pictures of her adorable children and grimacing husband.  That all changed a...
Angry Man

Satirists give masterclass in social media relations.

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It seems that our writers are on form today.  One of our articles has apparently upset a section of our readers more than usual,...

Sheffield councillors flummoxed By Spade and Pick Conundrum

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Sheffield councillors visiting a street improvement site were utterly bamboozled when contractors lined up three spades against a wall and invited the councillors to...
Golfer

Fury as Brexit voter can’t get tee off time at Golf Club he isn’t...

2
Local Brexit voter, Steve Dickinson, is said to be furious with Manchester Golf Club after discovering he can't get the tee off times he wants since letting his membership lapse.

Dame Judi Dench Shows Off New Tattoo

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Dame Judi Dench, 81 years young, gave the world it's first sneak preview of her first ever tattoo at this afternoon's premiere of Aladdin...

Survey reveals majority of Britons ‘don’t know where Rochdale is’

17
A recent survey carried out by fifth formers at the Don Estelle Academy (formerly the Cyril Smith School for Boys) in Rochdale revealed that...

Suspicious package that led to Burnley hospital evacuation identified as basket of fruit

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A 'suspicious package' that led to the evacuation of Burnley General Hospital earlier today has been identified as a basket of fruit, according to...
Tree lined street

Sheffield City Council issues injunction against Councillor for doing councillory things.

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In the increasing farrago that surrounds Sheffield City Council's efforts to denude the streets of lush, green, oxygen-providing, shade-giving trees - in the quest...

Monty Python Parrot cleared fit for work by ATOS

The famous Monty Python Parrot was cleared for work this morning following a work capability assessment interview.
Man in tree with chainsaw

Sheffield Council misunderstand the word ‘Socialist’

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Sheffield council yesterday accepted they had fundamentally misunderstood the concept of 'socialism'.  Following a vehement rejection by local residents of their plan to cut down...

Do You Live in an Uneducated, Inbred, White Ghetto? Take Our Quiz For 5...

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The Herald are proud to bring you this fun & easy to do quiz - Find out if you are inbred white-trash! Question 1 -...
Man Reading Menu

Man pretending to understand the wine list

A man is trying his very hardest to look like he understands the wine list in a restaurant. Steve Dickinson was handed the wine list...

Industrial Action Threatened as British Workers Jobs at Threat in Languages Row

Reports that several British workers have had their employment terminated from the world famous British sofa manufacturer Zestra, because they failed to learn Polish...

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