Chinese space station crashes into Burnley causing £12-50 worth of damage
The Tiangong-1 Chinese space station that has been out of control since 2016 finally crashed down to Earth in the early hours of Monday...
Rochdale vale terrorised by 1% outlaw motorhome gangs
Rochdale is in the grips of an outlaw Caravaner gang; who are terrorising wild life, being a public nuisance and brawling with dog walkers...
Trading Standards to prosecute Gastro Pub for using plates
A new gastro pub, The Pissed Idiot, in Rochdale is under investigation by trading standards after allegedly serving food on actual plates rather than...
Dead burglar to get state funeral
A Rochdale burglar who was killed whilst at work will receive a state funeral.
Councillor Tom Walsh said, "This man wasn't any old burgular. He...
Northern man puts teabag directly in bin without putting it in the sink
In a world first a northern man has put a teabag into the bin without first putting it into the sink for a few...
Woakes Croaks – Jokes Hoax Chokes Stokes’ Folks
It has been revealed that a story about England cricket all-rounder Ben Stokes, which was definitely not printed in the Rochdale Herald, was a...
Danczuk Less Popular than standing in dog shit
Here at the Herald we've seen numerous "news" sources state that Britain's answer to Donald Trump has considerable support amongst Labour Party members. We somehow...
Three in critical condition after tragic scone miss-pronunciation attack
Police have closed access to Battenburg street in Middleton today as the investigation into an altercation at the Middleton tea rooms has left three...
Corner shop owner lynched by mob in Rochdale after caught selling Yorkshire Tea
Marge Riley, 74, was confronted by an angry mob of local residents who objected to her display of Yorkshire Teas.
“I just wanted to give...
Child taken from mother after being forced to live as a Tory
A seven-year-old boy from Rochdale who had been "living life entirely as a Tory" has been taken from his mother's care following a High...
Fury as Brexit voter can’t get tee off time at Golf Club he isn’t...
Local Brexit voter, Steve Dickinson, is said to be furious with Manchester Golf Club after discovering he can't get the tee off times he wants since letting his membership lapse.
Real housewives of Rochdale Town scrapped
Channel 5 has announced that it has scrapped its planned series "Real Housewives Of Rochdale Town" after the pilot episode turned out to be...
Man who’s spent last 4 years banging on about Blitz Spirit buys 70 bottles...
A Rochdale resident who regularly invokes the Blitz Spirit has been out an panic bought 70 bottles of hand sanitizer today.
Bill Board regularly greets...
Homeless Bloke says Stop buying me McDonald’s, I’m homeless not f***ing desperate
A homeless Rochdale man has been telling the Herald about how he's fed up of virtue signalling people only buying him McDonald's meals.
David Wild...
People nobody has heard of resign from party that no longer has purpose
UKIP, the party whose sole purpose was to foster the UK public to vote to leave the EU- which happened despite them- is apparently...
No Segs Please, We’re Rochdalians
Barmy Council Imposes Blanket Blakey Ban
Rochdale Metropolitan Borough Council have imposed a blanket ban on Segs, the popular metal footwear protector, following complaints from the...
