America

“Kim Jong Un? He can’t dance, that brother ain’t got no Seoul. You know I put the rump into Trump babycakes. When I slut drop you know it’s going to be fire and fury on the dance floor.”

Good guys with guns in America went on the record this morning to complain they're unfairly getting a bad reputation after failing to prevent the 2078th successive mass shooting since 2,000.

On the eve of the US Presidential Election Donald Trump has dramatically pulled out of the running. Don Trump, 58 and owner of Streamline Taxis on the Oldham Road in Rochdale, has announced that he...

Donald Trump has announced the launch of a new science course that will be taught at Trump University from September. The course will feature subject matter not covered in more traditional science courses and will be aimed...

President Donald Trump has thrown an unexpected and much appreciated lifeline to the 2020 Darwin Awards. The well-known website which describes itself as  a "salute the improvement of the human genome by honoring those who...

Sean Spicer has put rumours to rest that Hawkish generals in the United States military are deploying military assets without Presidential authorisation. "Look I know it's been a shitty week for comparing stuff to Hitler...

Apparently POTUS did get Ivanka to click on the “forgotten your password?” help icon on the device that destroys worlds and was offered a series of security questions in order to reset his password.

Sources close to the President have confirmed that Donald Trump's willy is not bigger than Kim Jong Un's. It is being reported around the world in the mainstream media that top White House aide Ivanka...

News broke this morning that Donald Trump has turned down an offer from the White House human resources department to attend a special course on sexual harassment citing that he is already pretty damn...

More than two years after the fatal shooting of teenager Michael Brown, which led to widespread protests against police brutality across the U.S., many Twitter activists are shocked to discover that their hashtag campaigns...

Potential Commander in Chief and obsessive tiny handed gesturer, Donald Trump, made the extraordinary admittance in an interview with CNN. The revelation came as the FBI raided his luxary solid gold maisonette in Long Island,...

  White House press secretary Sean "Ginger" Spicer has issued an ultimatum to the US media in the wake of the growing row over the lingerie line belonging to President Trump's daughter Ivanka. Spicegirl accused the...

In preparation for his inauguration ceremony, President elect Trump has commissioned Fabergé, the esteemed and historic jewellery makers to the Russian emperors, to craft him the "biggliest and most expensive selfie stick in the...

A giant orange man child who accidentally got himself elected President of the United States during a publicity stunt for his gaudy golf course business announced live on television that he doesn't make mistakes, immediately before making a mistake.

The United States is getting a new national anthem, it has been announced. An executive order has been signed replacing the old anthem, The Star-Spangled Banner, with a new song, Donald, Donald Uber Alles. When...