Pathetic snowflake cries over claim less guests at his party than other
Little spoilt toddler Donald again could be heard from across Washington today, as he wailed and screamed about other children having more guests at their party.
The ruined little shit had been excited as the...
Trump loses grip on reality, demands to be new Dr Who.
US President Donald Trump has called on the BBC to appoint him as the new Dr Who.
In a series of tweets at 3am this morning the famously insomniac US president announced that he would...
Having dodgy dealings with corrupt foreign dictators is only bad when Hillary does it,...
Having Dodgy dealings with corrupt foreign dictators is only a bad thing when it is done by the likes of Hillary Clinton, Fox News announced today.
In their official statement, Fox News stated categorically that...
US Closes Wardrobe Border Travel Bans on Narnians and Radical Followers of Aslan
President Donald Trump last night signed an Executive Order immediately banning "followers of Aslan" from entering the US.
This will instantly affect talking beavers, centaurs and ice queens, though Kellyanne Conway has secured an exemption.
The...
I wouldn’t rape a fat woman, I have standards – says Trump
Thousands of Republican voters suffered serious head injuries yesterday after face palming themselves really hard during a Trump Rally.
Trump voters deface Police posters with Trump stickers
Police Officers in Bumshart Nebrahoma were furious to discover that recruitment posters around the town had been defaced with pictures of Donald Trump.
The multi-million pound recruitment drive in the book free town of Bumshart...
He knew what he signed up for, says dickhead who doesn’t know what he...
Proving once and for all that sometimes the best thing to say is nothing, Donald Trump told the widow of a grieving soldier that he "knew what he signed up for" and failed to...
US celebrates after number of days so far this year overtakes number of mass...
Americans across America are celebrating the fact that for the first time since the invention of calendars there have been more days in the year than mass shootings in America.
"It's super! I genuinely can't...
Donald Trump commemorative jigsaws to have missing pieces by design
The White House has confirmed that the new range of Trump jigsaw puzzles, commemorating the President's achievements in office, are deliberately missing several pieces.
The release of the puzzles is timed to capitalise on Trump’s...
Trump Perfected Curtsy For Saudi King Salman
Donald Trump's impeachment looked ever more certain in the last few days after images were released of him curtsying before King Salman of Saudi Arabia.
As social media exploded with moving images of Donald using...
Emperor Trump appoints frog-faced racist as UK ambassador to US
In a bold show of complete disregard for the sovereignty of British Parliament, his highness emperor Trump has appointed a well-known and unelected frog-faced racist called Nigel as UK ambassador to the US.
Brexiteers are...
Senate approve plans for naughty corner in Oval Office
A White House insider has revealed plans to redesign the Oval Office to help Donald Trump, cope with the rigours of his job.
The actions of POTATUS have generated so much concern that staff have...
Trump nominates Bill Cosby for US Supreme Court
Bill Cosby has been elected to the US Supreme Court after being sentenced for sex assault.
Cosby, who today received a 10 year sentence for drugging and sexually assaulting a woman over a decade ago...
Trump’s presidency is ‘metaphorical, not literal’, says Spicer
Following unsubstantiated wiretapping allegations, president Trump’s press secretary, Sean Spicer, has argued that Trump is the metaphorical president and leader of the free world, rather than the literal one.
“All these things, elections, accusations, tweets, policy...
Putin sacks head of US State Department Rex Tillerson
WASHINGTON - The leader of the United States, President Vladimir Putin, announced Tuesday morning that he had fired his Secretary State Rex Tillerson and installed former chicken nugget salesman and former CIA director Mike...
Fictional President held to higher standard than actual President
Fictional President of the United States Francis Underwood has been obliged to step down this week following allegations of historical sexual harassment.
Whilst his Presidency has been marred by a number of controversies, FPOTUS Underwood...