America

The Head of the National Cutlery Association, Wayne La Cuillère, has lashed out at Donald Trump on Twitter this afternoon, after the US President made a series of controversial comments about knife crime in...

America's creepiest uncle, State Department Obergruppenführer Steve 'Steve-O' Bannon confirmed today that steps were being taken to deport 'dangerous subversive' the Statue of Liberty.  "Ms Liberty is originally a French national and the French let...

Mette Frederiksen, the Prime Minister of Denmark has reportedly expressed an interest in buying the Russian controlled territory of the United States of America. Rich in natural resources and fuckwits the territory covers almost 10...

Washington has been shocked by a controversial new book which claims that, on occasion, President Trump forgets to put the toilet seat down. The provocative claim, drawn from Michael Wolff's new work Fire and...

“How would you stage a cavalry charge with a bunch of trucks?” Prof A Lither of Charlottesville wanted to know. “You’d have whiny little left wing cuckold snowflake hippy vegetarians complaining about the damage to the grass before you so much as made it across the field and into the unarmed ranks of the alt-left fanatics.

A country who sells weapons over the counter to anybody who wants one is stumped at how it can be home to so many fatal shootings. This country has the highest number of gun fatalities...

In the wake of the latest mass shooting in a school in Florida that has claimed the lives of at least 14 people The White House has released a statement saying it's "too soon since the...

Soon to be former-president, Barrack "Bazzer" Obama has said that nobody ever said that democracy was supposed to be easy and "it's harder than a priest in a daycare centre," in an attempt to...

Donald Trump has today been credited with restoring America's faith in Bush. Dwayne Dwight of Alabama told the Herald "I was big into Bush in the 80's. I couldn't get enough. Then in the 90's I...

The USA's hopes to add another pointlessly American sport to the 2020 Olympic have been dashed by the IOC due to concerns over the scoring system. The USAOC had lobbied to have Police-State Violence -...

The new President's controversial Muslim ban has caused outrage across the globe and chaos in airports all across the US. Last night thousands of protesters gathered in central Manchester, joining many others in major cities...

Following unsubstantiated wiretapping allegations, president Trump’s press secretary, Sean Spicer, has argued that Trump is the metaphorical president and leader of the free world, rather than the literal one. “All these things, elections, accusations, tweets, policy...

Bill Clinton, who famously began his Presidency by drawing up a list of every woman in America between the ages of 18 and 35, has formally handed over his Little Black Book to President Trump.

President Donald J. Trump has apologised for misreading an email which has led to some bizarre policy announcements in the last few days. The President was sent an email asking him for ‘draft proposals’ which he...

New York - There has been more fire and fury today as a blaze at the top of Trump Tower in New York left tone person dead. Questions have already been raised by commentators as...

"You want this sort of thing to happen less often? You don’t need to ban cars, you need to ban piece of sh*t, Nazi-sympathising, race-hating, white supremacist assh*les from marching through city streets with burning torches," said one Antifa protestor.