America

The recently announced decision that the wall between Mexico and the USA will be built using American taxpayers money under a piece of legislation drawn up and abandoned by the George W Bush administration...

The world was horrified but not terribly surprised to discover this morning that professional gambler and self-styled American oligarch Biff Tannen secured the US Presidential nomination. Conspiracy theorists around the world have wondered for years...

Two mysterious Russian stationery salesmen are coming under scrutiny tonight as memo wallets they supplied to government departments may not be all they are cracked up to be.  An insider at the office for the...

Shortages of thoughts and prayers for the victims of gun violence is said to be reaching crisis point this morning with many dead people in El Paso yet to receive them. Vital supplies of platitudes...

Christmas is coming, the POTUS is getting fat. Please to put a penny in the old man's retirement fund. Following the latest Trumptastrophy in Alabama, The White House have announced that there are only two...

It’s hoped that repeatedly asking Donald Trump to examine both the toy cow and the cows visible at varying distances outside of the caravan will cause a lightbulb moment in the dark and empty space that serves as a brain for Donald, but no one is getting their hopes up.

The USA's hopes to add another pointlessly American sport to the 2020 Olympic have been dashed by the IOC due to concerns over the scoring system. The USAOC had lobbied to have Police-State Violence -...

Leaders around the world let out a simultaneous sigh of despair last night as the Republican Party confirmed Donald Trump's presidential nomination. In yet another blow for world peace, global stability and perhaps even the...

President Donald J. Trump will keep his promise not to come in the world’s mouth and insisted he would squirt his emissions onto the neck and face instead. “Melania hates the taste of my goodly...

For the first time in almost fifty years the name Adolf is topping the lists for most popular baby names in the United States of America. “The name really went out of fashion in the...

Pepe the frog has admitted today that he was behind the success of Donald Trump in the recent US presidential elections. "Presidential? Fix-a-dential more like! Am I right? How old are those people?" laughed Pepe,...

Mette Frederiksen, the Prime Minister of Denmark has reportedly expressed an interest in buying the Russian controlled territory of the United States of America. Rich in natural resources and fuckwits the territory covers almost 10...

Donald Trump has demanded "they fire these sons of bitches" over the growing #takeafinger protests. A woman pictured raising her middle finger toward Trump's motorcade has reportedly been fired from her job over the photograph. The...

US President elect, Donald Trump, will be hosting a tribute event for Martin Luther Day

Donald Trump hit a new low today by disembowelling a newborn baby and eating her still beating heart like an apple after she interrupted him during a speech at a rally. The esteemed political philosopher...

The White House's official 2017 Christmas card will feature President Donald Trump high-fiving the Imperial Wizard of the Ku Klux Klan, a spokesperson confirmed today. Bearing the message, "We're dreaming of a white Christmas," the...