Donald Trump DNA

Donald Trump: DNA test finds ‘strong evidence’ of human DNA

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US President Donald Trump has revealed that a DNA test shows "strong evidence" that he is distantly related to human beings. He took the test...

Canada recognises the Alamo as capital of Mexico

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Donald Trump has given a calm and measured response to news that Canada intends to move it's Mexican embassy to the Alamo. Just kidding. Trump...

Trump tells G7 steel tariffs will ensure weapons used for mass slaughter will be...

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Donald Trump has announced that steel and aluminium import tariffs will mitigate concerns that the Assault Rifles used in mass shootings recently have not...
Sergei Lavrov

Kremlin accuse American spooks of lying to Trump

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The Kremlin has accused America's security services of treasonous behaviour after Lavrov's love in with Trump. A spokesman for the Kremlin released the following warning to...
Trump Salute

Trump demands to see soldier’s long form death certificate

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Donald Trump has demanded that the widow of Sgt La David Johnson release his long form death certificate following a row about whether or...

Denmark offers to buy America from Russia

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Mette Frederiksen, the Prime Minister of Denmark has reportedly expressed an interest in buying the Russian controlled territory of the United States of America. Rich...
Donald Trump

Trump campaign starts selling dog whistles

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Donald Trump's 2020 re-election campaign has debuted a new range of MAGA dog whistles at a rally in Florida this past weekend. Florida Trump fan...

Trump says there’s more skeletons in his closet after FBI find six

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Potential Commander in Chief and obsessive tiny handed gesturer, Donald Trump, made the extraordinary admittance in an interview with CNN. The revelation came as the...

Robert E Lee statue replaced by bronze of obese man on mobility scooter holding...

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“How would you stage a cavalry charge with a bunch of trucks?” Prof A Lither of Charlottesville wanted to know. “You’d have whiny little left wing cuckold snowflake hippy vegetarians complaining about the damage to the grass before you so much as made it across the field and into the unarmed ranks of the alt-left fanatics.
International Thundercunt

Trump claims their is good people on both sides of grammar nazi debate

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President Trump has weighed into the grammer nazi debate by claiming their is good people on both sides. Discussions and arguments about correct use of...
Sorry Trump

Donald Trump ‘very sorry’ for accidentally nuking North Carolina

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As the world looked on with intrigue and anticipation at the spat between the USA and North Korea, a horrifying incident occurred. With the...

Satirist sues CNN for stealing Trump Headline

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The Rochdale Herald has issued a cease and desist letter to CNN after they stole a satirical headline about Donald Trump.

The only chemicals you can kills kids with are high explosives and white phosphorus,...

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Following the outcry over the alleged chemical weapons attacks in Syria, the Pentagon have confirmed that the only legal chemicals you can use to...

Black Cops to shoot unarmed white civilians in controversial Charlotte anti-racism plan

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Charlotte Police Department have unveiled a controversial yet utterly foolproof plan to combat claims that their police force is institutionally racist. They're going to let...
Turkey

Turkey pardoned by Trump beats him at scrabble

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A Turkey that was pardoned by Donald Trump for Thanksgiving has beaten him at scrabble. Traditionally a turkey is pardoned by the serving President just...

Am I Mexican? Ask Trump voters after he says USA will pay for Wall

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The recently announced decision that the wall between Mexico and the USA will be built using American taxpayers money under a piece of legislation...

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