Germany to face sanctions for failing to help US during D-Day landings
Donald Trump has today announced a huge package of far reaching sanctions against Germany after discovering that Germany failed to help the US during...
NEWSFLASH – Trump withdraws from Election
On the eve of the US Presidential Election Donald Trump has dramatically pulled out of the running.
Don Trump, 58 and owner of Streamline Taxis...
First shipment of thoughts and prayers for mass shooting victims arrive in California
It's all better in California now after a much needed vital shipment of thoughts and prayers arrived in Gilroy following today's mass shooting.
"Yeah, we're...
Daily Mail Editor to pay Melania Trump $150m with no prospect of Happy Ending
The Editor of The Daily Mail was said to be gutted at the prospect of having to pay Melania Trump millions of dollars for...
Father Ted to use toy cow to explain perspective to Donald Trump
It’s hoped that repeatedly asking Donald Trump to examine both the toy cow and the cows visible at varying distances outside of the caravan will cause a lightbulb moment in the dark and empty space that serves as a brain for Donald, but no one is getting their hopes up.
Light spectroscopy confirms Trump wears a toupee and it’s 70% alpaca
Donald Trump's hair is partly fake, and the fake part is not even human hair, but alpaca, scientists working for NASA's Astronomical spectroscopy division...
Pound Hits New High of “20 Bundles of Corn” as USA Adopts Barter System
The US Dollar has been abandoned and the Barter System adopted following Donald Trump's victory in the 2016 US Presidential Election. Fort Knox are...
Jesus definitely said ‘Suffer the little children to come unto me, so I can...
The US Vice President, Mike Pence, has told reporters that the Trump administration's policy of keeping child migrants in cages is definitely consistent with the...
IOC Vote Against New American Sport in 2020 Olympics
The USA's hopes to add another pointlessly American sport to the 2020 Olympic have been dashed by the IOC due to concerns over the...
Hilary Clinton’s emails confirm she would have already nuked North Korea
Further extracts reveal she had plans to construct “Wall Street on the Korean Peninsula” once the “dust and stuff has settled.”
Trump presidency result of Putin prank phone call
Russian President and superstar house elf, Vladimir Putin, has revealed that the whole Trump/Russia thing is a prank that went too far.
"Trump come to...
Donald Trump’s penis not bigger than Kim Jong Un’s, confirms Ivanka Trump
Sources close to the President have confirmed that Donald Trump's willy is not bigger than Kim Jong Un's.
It is being reported around the world...
Black Cops to shoot unarmed white civilians in controversial Charlotte anti-racism plan
Charlotte Police Department have unveiled a controversial yet utterly foolproof plan to combat claims that their police force is institutionally racist.
They're going to let...
Donald Trump moves Mar a Lago to Tampa Bay for insurance purposes
Donald Trump has applied to have the address of his Mar-a-Lago changed from Palm Beach to Tampa Bay, ahead of the arrival of Hurricane...
Whitehouse denies denying things that were denied last week
The Whitehouse press corps was today left totally baffled by the latest denial issued by a Whitehouse press spokesperson.
The denial was in response to...
Trump Introduces 2020 Presidential Campaign Mascot
President Trump took to the stage in Nuremberg, Florida, on Saturday in front of a crowd seen from space, to unveil his mascot for...
