Donald Trump to present Steve Bannon with participation medal for service to America
“Bannon great American. Cant find greater. So great. Greater than Kennedy. Kennedy loser. Got shot. Only losers get shot. Couldnt even drive own car. Bannon deserve medal for participation at White Hoise! Turned up every day even when I didn't!”
Only a good guy with a knife can stop a bad guy with a...
The Head of the National Cutlery Association, Wayne La Cuillère, has lashed out at Donald Trump on Twitter this afternoon, after the US President...
Mass shootings are an unsolvable problem says country with a mass shootings problem
A country that has a really serious problem with deranged lunatics buying really big guns and shooting dozens of strangers has publicly said it...
America in shock after a live streamed dispute is resolved without a single shot...
Americans were rocked to the core today to find that it was possible to resolve a dispute without gunfire.
Chuck Henderson, a 7-Eleven employee from...
Thoughts and prayers shortages in US reaching crisis point
Shortages of thoughts and prayers for the victims of gun violence is said to be reaching crisis point this morning with many dead people...
Daily Mail Editor to pay Melania Trump $150m with no prospect of Happy Ending
The Editor of The Daily Mail was said to be gutted at the prospect of having to pay Melania Trump millions of dollars for...
Trump credited with restoring American faith in Bush
Donald Trump has been given credit for restoring America's faith in Bush.
One Bush expert told us, "10 years ago American faith in Bush was...
Scotch and Revolver sales jump 30,000% during Trump’s inaugural speech
Scotch Whiskey and revolver salesman all over the world are in buoyant mood this afternoon after a huge windfall sales extravaganza during President Trump's inaugural address.
Trump Named Person of the Year by Shit Hair Magazine
In an unpresidented turn of events, one of Donald Trump's tweets was proven to be correct today after Shit Hair Magazine declared him person...
Nigel Farage spends £1,000 on Ferrero Rocher ‘just in case’
Far right stringless Thunderbird puppet and multi-millionaire Dulwich educated ex-banker and man of the people Nigel Farage reportedly bought the middle class toffees straight...
Too soon since last mass shooting and not long enough before next one to...
In the wake of the latest mass shooting in a bar in Ohio that has claimed the lives of at least 9 people The White...
Official White House Nativity scene to feature baby Jesus with Trump’s face
The first image of the official White House nativity scene has been released, and it is already causing quite a stir.
Every character in the...
Trump says there’s more skeletons in his closet after FBI find six
Potential Commander in Chief and obsessive tiny handed gesturer, Donald Trump, made the extraordinary admittance in an interview with CNN.
The revelation came as the...
Paul Nuttall admits to FBI he passed US nuclear secrets to Russia
Paul Nuttall has sensationally admitted to the FBI that he passed US military secrets to Russia.
In a statement to the FBI Mr Nuttall admitted delivering...
Melania did not have sex with horrible old men for money admits Daily Mail
The Daily Mail have gone on the record today to say that Melania Trump did not and never has had sex with any horrible...
Michael Moore to release new ‘Bowling for Bowling Green’ documentary
The renowned liberal film maker made the announcement on his Facebook page earlier today, stating;
"After the huge success of my 2002 film, Bowling for...
