China celebrates start of the year of the rat with a plague
China is marking the start of the year of the rat with a global plague outbreak.
As spokesman told us, "We wanted a way of...
Trump to release fresh evidence that Obama shot JR
The so-called "President" of the United States has ordered the CIA release all of the files relating to the attempted assassination of Texan oil...
We tried democracy and Franco-ly it’s not for us, Spanish government tells voters
The Prime Minister of Spain has told voters that democracy isn't for them and it refuses to recognise the result of a referendum on...
Trump demands resignation of Dow Jones
White House sources reveal alleged serial sex offender, proven serial failed businessman and currently failing POTUS Donald J Trump has called for the head...
Palestinians Recognise Scunthorpe as Capital of US, Answering Question ‘Who put the ‘Trump’ in...
Following the United States decision to recognise Jerusalem as the capital of Israel, the Palestinian authorities have entered into the spirit of things and...
White House CCTV confirms Obama listening to Trump in Oval Office
Secret Service agents are reviewing White House CCTV footage this morning which Donald Trump believes show Obama inside the White House.
The footage, captured in...
Russia to shoot down all planes in Syrian airspace, including their own
This morning Russia released an announcement stating that any and all aircraft entering Syrian airspace will be immediately shot down without warning.
This, apparently,...
Get your hands out of Ivanka’s knickers, White House orders media
White House press secretary Sean "Ginger" Spicer has issued an ultimatum to the US media in the wake of the growing row over the...
State of emergency declared as Hurricane Dorian heads towards rich white people
Category 4 hurricane 'Dorian' has caused devastation throughout the Bahamas this week.
The hurricane has broken previous records of longest sustained category 5 status and...
Luftwaffe didn’t tell Hitler about every bomb dropped, just sayin, Spicer tells press corps
Sean Spicer has put rumours to rest that Hawkish generals in the United States military are deploying military assets without Presidential authorisation.
"Look I know...
Terrorists ‘disappointed’ to be rewarded with 72 vegans in heaven
Typographical error blamed for afterlife reward mix-up
The five jihadists involved in last Saturday's Spanish terror attack have expressed 'disappointment' upon receiving the heavenly reward...
Hurricane Harvey considered least destructive 2020 presidential candidate
In an attempt to win back votes from the orange-painted tweeting shitangutan, the Democrats have turned to Hurricane Harvey to stand as their candidate...
Director of CIA asks Jason Bourne to drop in on Trump for a ‘quiet...
The Director of The CIA, John O'Brennan, asked Jason Bourne to pop over to Trump Tower.
Following allegations Donald Trump made about the US intelligence...
Fire at Trump Tower definitely not Donald Trump Jr burning Russia dossier, confirms Donald...
New York - There has been more fire and fury today as a blaze at the top of Trump Tower in New York left...
President Trump to ‘grab May by the pussy’
Donald Trump may touch the UK prime minister's vagina in their first private meeting, the president has tweeted.
The straw-haired misogynist wrote, "Excited to meet...
Australian PM Turnbull Reaffirms his Compassionate Commitment to Offshore Detention
Last night’s Four Corners program on asylum seekers held on Nauru, elicited an angry response from the Nauruan government, who accused the ABC of racism.



















































