Australian MPs vote unanimously to make burka compulsory for Pauline Hanson
Former chip shop owner Hanson later complained that the decision proved conclusively the unwarranted discrimination faced by women wearing Islamic garb in Australia and vowed that she would fight tooth and nail to ensure they enjoyed the same rights as other Australian women just as soon as she'd finished fighting to have them all deported.
US Navy confirms gigantic sky penis ‘not aimed at any particular President’
US Navy officials have said that the penis drawn in the sky by one of their pilots using a fighter jet's contrails was absolutely...
Julian Assange plans quiet Christmas at home
Julian Assange has confirmed that he will be having a quiet Christmas at home this year.
In a telephone call Mr Assange told us,...
Donald Trump is a twat, confirm G6 leaders
Leader's of the G6 have agreed on the text of a communique officially declaring that Donald Trump is a twat.
One spokesperson said, "It's been...
EU to force UK to use £ s d following Brexit…
Brussels has warned that Britain will no longer be allowed to use the decimal system following Brexit and will be forced to go back...
Man who works at institution he’s opposed to because he’s paid to says he...
Nigel Farage, who said a month ago that he wouldn't pledge support for Trump, has appeared at a Trump rally to pledge support for...
Head of worlds largest global paedophile network spotted in Dublin
The leader of a global paedophile network has arrived in Ireland as he begins touring the country today.
Pope Francis flew into Dublin Airport and was...
Statue Of Liberty To Be Deported
America's creepiest uncle, State Department Obergruppenführer Steve 'Steve-O' Bannon confirmed today that steps were being taken to deport 'dangerous subversive' the Statue of Liberty.
"Ms...
Waxwork of Donald Trump removed from Museum in Bumshart Nebrahoma
A full size model of Donald Trump used for "selfies" by visitors to a museum has been removed by popular demand.
Pictures shared all over...
Mary and Joseph arrested for health tourism
Reports are reaching us that 2 people have been arrested in Judah on suspicion of being healthcare tourists. The pair say they are parents...
Trump demands to see soldier’s long form death certificate
Donald Trump has demanded that the widow of Sgt La David Johnson release his long form death certificate following a row about whether or...
Julian Assange wins FSB employee of the month
Julian Assange has explained that he is happy to be awarded FSB's employee of the month for July award.
The Russian secret service organisation said...
Fatal logic feedback loop kills five more Americans
America has once again been proved right as yet another mass shooting takes place in shopping mall and nobody armed inside could shoot the...
Scandinavian ‘Too Drunk To Stand’ Following Drunk-Sleighing Arrest
Rochdale magistrates heard how a visitor from Lapland, Mr Nicholas Saint (1,747) created havoc in Rochdale with his erratic control over his team of excitable reindeer pulling a bright red sleigh.
All options on table including surprise missile attack on Tuesday, Trump tells Syria on...
Actual real-life president of the United States of America Donald Trump has tweeted that Russia and Syria should get smart and expect a surprise...
Donald Trump to join list of ‘self-aware’ animals after recognising himself in a mirror
US President Donald Trump joined the list of animals capable of self-awareness yesterday, following reports that he may have finally recognised himself in a...
