Pensioners

Remain camp optimistic about outcome of second referendum following forecasts of harsh winter

4
Reports of a harsh winter allied with a fuel crisis has buoyed hopes of remaining part of the EC. Remain campaigner Frank Anwalther said "We...

Physicist angry that with infinite universes, he got one with Trump in it

0
A failed physicist and lapsed university lecturer has lamented online about his inner anxieties.
Theresa May

Kaiser Chiefs hurriedly rerelease ‘I Predict a Riot’

3
As crowds of surprisingly calm protesters gather at Westminister to demand the resignation of the recently elected droid, Maybot 2.0, The Kaiser Chiefs are...

Government takes time off from covering up child abuse to tell people what kind...

0
The UK Government has taken time off from failing the victims of institutional child abuse and covering the tracks of high profile paedophiles to tell people what kind of pornography they're allowed to watch.
Brexiter

Means Testing Means Means Testing Means say Meanies

0
Winter heating supplements for elderly people on low incomes are to become means tested, if the so-called Mean Party's manifesto promise is carried out.  In a...

Britain faces Sophie’s choice over which incompetent arsehole leads it

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Britain has revealed it is spoiled for choice on which incompetent aresehole it has leading it. A spokesman told us, "Everyone is cheering at the...

Conservative Christmas Party cancelled after failing to negotiate piss up deal with brewery

0
There was despair throughout the Conservative Party today after government officials announced that the annual Christmas do has been cancelled. The news comes after many...

Shit sandwiches start to taste better after you have swallowed the first bite, David...

11
Following the Government's success in the Great Repeal Act, Brexit Secretary David Davies has moved to assure Parliament that the lingering taste of this...

John McDonnell caught on film pushing Diane Abbott under bus while out jogging

0
John McDonell has been embroiled in a bizarre cover up involving himself and Diane Abbot
Theresa May

Theresa May – the facts

0
Theresa May - the facts She is planning to get Hello magazine to do an exclusive of her luxury life in No 10 2. She...
Pensioners

UKIP unveil radical plans to appeal to voters who are still alive

0
New UKIP leader, Henry Bolton has caused a stir at the party conference in Torquay by suggesting it should do more to appeal to...
Theresa May

UK to hold referendum on whether or not to carry on pretending May knows...

11
The Home Office announced this morning that voters in the U.K. will be asked to tick yes or no again in a referendum shortly....

Gove Demands Westminster Soft Play Area

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Michael Gove MP caused elation inside Kate Hoey MP today with his demand for a soft play area at the Palace of Westminster. Gove, the...

To be fair I was pissed, says Nigel 2.0 candidate

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Steven Woolfe, the chief xenophobe-in-waiting of totally unracist UKIP party has been caught out forgetting things. Again. After forgetting to apply for the candidacy he's standing...

Nationalism only good if you’re not Scottish, say nationalists who aren’t Scottish

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Nationalists across England are up in arms at the suggestion that Scotland might have a referendum to leave the UK and become an independent...

Momentum release Labour leader themed children’s book ‘Where’s Corbyn?’

6
Children of the proletariat were delighted at the news today that Momentum are publishing a series of exciting Labour leader themed children's books. The first...

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