Merkel Pulls Out of EU Security Council Talks as There’s No German Word for...
Angela Merkel broke off talks with the EU's British Security Commissioner this week that were about the worsening crisis affecting the free movement of people.
One man’s terrorist is another man’s freedom fighter, insists Theresa May
Alarmed by Labour leader Jeremy Corbyn's threat to cross the floor of the House of Commons to challenge for the Tory leadership, Prime Minister...
Obviously you should agree with me, it’s 2017 say progressives, obviously
People across the nation are up in arms that other people don’t apparently realise that it’s the current year.
“It’s 2017,” said Faye Zbuk-Warrior,” I...
Downing Street denies allegations of incontinence
In an unprecedented announcement, Downing Street issued a denial of any suggestions that the Prime Minister is incontinent.
"During a period of initial uncertainty, many...
Dead refugees welcome say Home Office
Refugees will be welcome to Great Britain providing they are dead, under a new scheme announced by the Home Office.
The new measures, expected to...
ISIS Second In Command Killed Again
The Daily Express has reported for the eighth time this month the death of so called Islamic State's second in command.
"He was killed by...
Nuttall loses close personal seats in election disaster
Accident prone Paul Nuttall, leader of UKIP, faced fresh tragedy today after learning that all his ‘close personal seats’ were lost in an election...
Surprise! I was born in Kenya says Barack Obama
Barack Obama surprised the world today after announcing that he wasn't actually born in America after all but was actually born in Kenya, and to top it off is a Muslim.
Brexit voters furious at a British Court today
Brexit voters today were unsure who to be furious at today after a British Court as opposed to a European Court made a decision about the nature of British Parliamentary Sovereignty.
Extinction Rebellion glue themselves to new Brexit deal
In a disastrous move for Boris Johnson, a member of climate protest group Extinction Rebellion have glued themselves to the newly negotiated Brexit deal.
White,...
Contractor used for Tory conference stage wins £2bn social housing contract.
The contractor used for the Tory conference stage set has been awarded a £2bn social housing contract.
Brian Odget and Simon Carper, who have been...
Momentum members take comfort from prospect of cheaper ski holidays
Whenever election results don't go as hoped, there is always a chance that the downhearted will become the outright depressed. Fortunately, Momentum organiser Mia...
I’m President of what? Asks Donald Trump
After the shock of winning the popularity contest "President Factor", President elect Trump has now talked about his next career move. We asked him...
Johnson replaces Cabinet with the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse
Boris Johnson committed himself to leading Britain into 'a new chapter' yesterday. Downing Street sources revealed that the chapter referred to by the tousled...
Pro Brexit MP’s walk out of Brexit meeting rather than face reality
Several Brexit-supporting MPs walked out of a meeting on Brexit today when a report proved to be too gloomy.
“I was expecting the report to...
Grant Shapps hires ferry fleet to transport people back to offices
Transport secretary Grant Shapps is so convinced that going back to work in offices is safe, that he has hired a fleet of ferries...
