Trump gives world a ‘pearl necklace’ as withdrawal does not stop emissions
President Donald J. Trump will keep his promise not to come in the world’s mouth and insisted he would squirt his emissions onto the...
Tit in Parliament in tits in Parliament row
Andrea Leadsom has found herself an unlikely ally in the UK's war on women and motherhood, Sammy Wilson MP.
Mr Wilson, the DUP MP for...
Anti-facemask campaigners in balaclavas thrilled about Austrian Burkha ban
In a welcome development for table thumping foam merchants from the far right, all face coverings have been banned in Austria.
For years, members far...
London celebrates first “Gammon Pride” event
Scotland Yard and the Met Police are bracing for potential violent clashes at a "Gammon Pride" event being held in London today.
The event will...
White House Press Office denies denying denials of denials denying denials
The White House Press Office has issued a fresh set of denials denying denials of denials denying denials.
"We knew about Mr Trump's links to...
May to offer Britain complete break from Boris Johnson
In a last ditch attempt to win the X Factor vote tonight,the PM today took the unusual but popular step to separate Boris Johnson...
Remainers lead campaign to remove warning labels from household chemicals and rerun Brexit referendum
It's been revealed that remainers are leading a campaign to remove warning labels from household chemicals. It's believed that this is part of their...
Tories to abolish hospital parking charges by abolishing hospitals
The Tory Party has today promised to abolish hospital parking charges by abolishing hospitals.
Tory manifesto spokesman, Bill Board told us, "We've done our research...
New UKIP leader had hypnotherapy to stop him saying “I”m not a racist, but”...
UKIP’s press officer Ms Gline Garafe reassured a nervous nation today by stating that UKIP’s new leader has undergone hypnotherapy to stop him saying...
Trump makes it compulsory to carry guns in US
President Donald Trump has apparently just signed a new executive order making it compulsory for American citizens to carry guns about them at all...
Donald Trump to let Donald Trump fail now as it will be a lot...
Donald Trump has decided to extend his executive decision concerning repealing Obamacare to his entire presidency.
It is believed the most successful man ever to...
Bottoms up for Nuttall
In an unprecedented move, UKIP leader and shampoo user of the year 2008, Paul Nuttall, has finally come clean about his much debated past.
"Now...
May: Difference between migrants and refugees is we don’t want either
Theresa May has said that refugees should settle in the first safe country they come to, rather than travel through several countries, and has...
Trump and Putin secret G20 meeting beyond ‘Netflix and Chill’
Reports ejaculating out of Hamburg indicate that the secret meeting between President Trump and Vladimir Putin transcended sharing a duvet and gorging on Hagen-Daaz.
The...
Voters must provide family coat of arms as ID insists government
The government has been accused of the suppression of voters' rights after plans to introduce compulsory checks of a family coat of arms for...
Theresa May wins coveted Parliamentary Cross Party Hide and Seek Trophy
Prime minister Theresa May has won the 2017 Parliamentary Cross Party Hide and Seek Trophy ahead of stiff competition.
"It was an incredible effort from...
