Christmas moved to November 12th
Theresa May's government yesterday announced plans to move Christmas forward this year to November the 12th, just in case we don't all reach December.
The...
Intrepid British journalists discover tribe of foreigners who don’t let each other die in...
The British media world was stunned today by the discovery of a tribe of non-British humans who actually attempt to save each other after...
WW3 inevitable as Boris Johnson prank calls Putin and leaves burning bag of dog...
Hetrosexual Russian leader, Vladimir Putin immediately responded by sending a fleet of Grade 50 ballistic war ships to British waters.
He then instructed 4 million...
UKIP reveal solution to ‘Irish Problem’
Paul Nuttall revealed UKIP's Irish policy this afternoon and raised more hair than usual.
"It's clear Ireland is a problem as the United Kingdom hurtles...
US Police Departments to consider offering black suspects running start before shooting them
Following several nights of violence and riots across the United States in response to the death of George Floyd US police departments are said...
You had some very fine people on both sides, Trump tells D-Day veterans
Donald Trump has told D-Day veterans that there were very fine people on both sides of the battles to control the Normandy Beaches during...
Syrian children launch crowdfunding campaign to help those affected by KFC crisis
Children from the Syrian city of Damascus have launched a campaign to help those affected by the ongoing KFC chicken shortage.
In a video posted...
Emergency services called after Bob Geldof disappears up his own arse
Two fire engines along with police and ambulance crews were called to the centre of Dublin after reports came in that a man had...
Lord Lucan, Pol Pot, Martin Borman ,Abu Bakr al-Baghdadi and Boko Haram emerge from...
An entire top shelf of global mass murderers have signalled they plan to emerge from hiding following the announcement by US president Donald trump...
Trump in hiding as NRA call for curb ‘on rapid fire tools’
DONALD TRUMP is believed to be in hiding tonight after the National Rifle Association called for a clamp-down on “rapid fire tools”.
This has been...
Netanyahu Furious After Trump Scores Israel Lower Than Saudi Arabia In TripAdvisor Review
Prime Minister Netanyahu demanded an apology from the White House today. The
move came after Donald Trump scored his Israeli short stay lower than Saudi
Arabia...
Pope Officiates At Funeral For US Democracy
There was not a dry eye in the house today as Donald Trump, and the special ladies in his life, attended the funeral for...
Americans forced to drink milkshakes through AR-15 assault rifles after plastic straw ban hits...
The unjust plastic straw ban threatens the American way of life, but citizens are finding an innovative way to beat the ban.
Consuming tens of...
Despair after terrible person makes valid point
A man has been left bereft of all hope for the future after discovering that the worst person he knows might have made a...
Donald Trump’s penis not bigger than Kim Jong Un’s, confirms Ivanka Trump
Sources close to the President have confirmed that Donald Trump's willy is not bigger than Kim Jong Un's.
It is being reported around the world...
Foreign Aid for starving babies is wasteful say countries who landfill more food than...
The Foreign Aid budget is a waste of money according to arseholes in the U.K. Who throw out more food every year than they...



















































