People hoping absolute power will moderate narcissistic bully
Political analysts are speculating that now Donald Trump is leader of the free world his personality will metamorphose into that of a wise leader...
I married him for rugged good looks and winning personality claims Melania Trump
Melania Trump has gone on the record to tell the world that she married Donald Trump not for his money but his rugged good looks, winning personality and his open minded views on immigration.
Syrians praying for UK dog owners tonight
People across Syria are united in prayer tonight as Britain is bombarded with heavy rounds of fireworks, the worst we've seen in weeks.
"It's horrendous"...
Canada recognises the Alamo as capital of Mexico
Donald Trump has given a calm and measured response to news that Canada intends to move it's Mexican embassy to the Alamo.
Just kidding. Trump...
Australia to import convicts and export coal – Says Turnbull
Australian Prime Minister, Malcolm Turnbull, has left the G20 Summit with what he called a "stupendous new deal". After much grovelling to British Prime...
Giuliani wins Black Man of the Year
Raving Republican Trump-nugget and ex New York mayor, Rudy Giuliani, was voted Black Man of the Year today after it turned...
God brings Christopher Hitchens back from the dead for ‘shits and giggles’
Deceased intellectual and prominent atheist resurrected by The Almighty 'for a bit of a laugh' following hiatus.
Following what close acquaintances have described as 'a...
Screw Yemeni kids we make loads of money selling smart bombs to the Saudis...
It's absolutely fine that the UK supplies Saudi Arabia with the weapons that they are using to murder Yemeni children, Theresa May has told...
UN tells Goodwill Ambassador to fuck off
After a record low of zero days in the job, the new UN Ambassador, whose job it would've been to generally spread love and...
Royal Navy ordered to kill any f*cking Frenchman who so much as looks at...
10 Downing Street has ordered the Royal Navy to kill any f*cking Frenchman who so much as looks at a British fish.
The order has...
Trump launches intercontinental Tweet at North Korea
POTUS and orange spacehopper Donald Trump has reacted angrily to the first North Korean missile test since he took office.
The massive and overwhelming response...
Reverse-only cars to propel American manufacturing forward
It has been revealed that the Donald Trump administration plans to revitalise America’s former manufacturing heartland – the Rust Belt – with production of...
New York Times Reported to the House Committee for Un-American Activities
The New York Times, long considered to be the lap-dog mouthpiece of the Commie-loving East-coast foreigner, has finally (and thankfully) been reported to the...
Saudi Arabia’s handling of Khashoggi killing worst cover up ever, says completely bald man
A completely bald man who is convinced everybody thinks he has a full head of hair has criticised Saudi Arabia's handling of the killing...
Rank outsider sweeps to completely surprising victory in Turkish Presidential election
A rank-outsider has swept to victory in Turkey's presidential election defying the odds to secure a third five year term.
Election authority chief said "imagine...
We tried democracy and Franco-ly it’s not for us, Spanish government tells voters
The Prime Minister of Spain has told voters that democracy isn't for them and it refuses to recognise the result of a referendum on...



















































