Mary and Joseph arrested for health tourism

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Reports are reaching us that 2 people have been arrested in Judah on suspicion of being healthcare tourists. The pair say they are parents...

US Closes Wardrobe Border Travel Bans on Narnians and Radical Followers of Aslan

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President Donald Trump last night signed an Executive Order immediately banning "followers of Aslan" from entering the US.  This will instantly affect talking beavers, centaurs...
Trump Supporters

52% Of Trump Supporters Can’t Find America On A Map

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When it was pointed out to them exactly where America lay on the map, many of them seemed disappointed that it wasn’t the whole of North America from Mexico upwards.
hand written notes

Trump apologises for misreading email.

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President Donald J. Trump has apologised for misreading an email which has led to some bizarre policy announcements in the last few days. The President was...
Harvey Weinstein

Harvey Weinstein apologises for James Corden jokes

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Hollywood millionaire Harvey Weinstein has said he is "truly sorry" for cracking jokes about James Corden at a black tie charity dinner in Los...
Gaza

Israel celebrates Eurovision win by bombing Gaza strip

Israel has celebrated winning the Eurovision song contest with a massive aerial bombardment of the Gaza Strip and shooting dead some Palestinian civilians. Nine Palestinian...
Punggye-ri

North Korea piccalilli factory in full production – SHOCKING satellite images show

CHILLING satellite photographs show North Korean chemical factories are manufacturing weapons grade piccalilli in horrifying quantities. Grainy images at first sight lead viewers to think...
Trump Supporters

Trump discovers one weird trick to increasing attendance at his rallies

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The White House has confirmed that Donald Trump has found a weird trick to increasing attendance at his rallies. During a speech given to Texas...
White House

It’s too soon since last mass shooting and not long enough before next to...

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In the wake of the latest mass shooting in a school in Florida that has claimed the lives of at least 14 people The White House...

Pothead Calls Kettle Black; Clinton Challenges Trump To TV Drug Blowout

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Trump Challenges Clinton To Drug Test Prior To Next Debate - Clinton Lashes Back With Drug Taking Contest Challenge US Election 2016; Following Donald Trump's...
Happy Family

Couples who call each other Mummy and Daddy told to pack it the f*ck...

Couples who call each other Mummy and Daddy have been told by the authorities to pack it the fuck in or be faced with...

Argentina offers to invade Falklands Islands for £1B if that will help May?

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A man claiming to represent Argentina has allegedly phoned the British prime minister and said for £1 billion they will pretend to invade the...
International Thundercunt

Donald Trump wins ‘International Thundercunt of the Year Award’ after declaring war on children

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President Donald Trump has been awarded the International Thundercunt of the Year Award following his decision to remove protections for young people brought into...

Australian PM Turnbull Reaffirms his Compassionate Commitment to Offshore Detention

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Last night’s Four Corners program on asylum seekers held on Nauru, elicited an angry response from the Nauruan government, who accused the ABC of racism.

Trump tells reporters that he’s cured Megadeth

POTATUS, Donald Trump has made a sensational claim that he's cured Megadeth today. In a rambling 4 hour speech Trump said, "You know what's amazing?...

Donald Trump’s penis is largest the world has ever seen says Donald Trump

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Donald Trump has asked his propaganda secretary, Sean Spicer, to assure The White House press corps that President Trump's penis is "the largest penis in the history of penises. Period!"

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