Trump says he didn’t sexually assault 3.52 billion other women
Bewigged bouffant buffoon, Donald J. Trump, an actual potential president, made the claim at his latest rally.
The tiny handed eater of souls came under...
“We’re looking forward to getting out” say nuclear weapons.
Nuclear weapons all over the world are today looking forward to their upcoming launch as an opportunity to stretch their legs.
With launch codes about...
Modern Day Presidential latest euphemism for complete and utter numpty, say linguists
As Humpty Dumpty said, "When I use a word, it means whatever I want it to mean." Clearly in a world of self-reductible horseshit,...
Crazy bastard calls crazy bastard a crazy bastard
A crazy bastard who works in the White House has accused a former employee of being a crazy bastard.
The crazy bastard apparently "disavowed' the...
G20 Crisis as Trump eats hot dogs in Hamburg.
President Donald Trump caused outrage in Hamburg, Germany today, eating hot dogs and apple pie and drinking root beer all flown in with him...
Daily Mail Editor to pay Melania Trump $150m with no prospect of Happy Ending
The Editor of The Daily Mail was said to be gutted at the prospect of having to pay Melania Trump millions of dollars for...
Kremlins useful idiots deny that they’re Kremlins useful idiots
A bunch of useful idiots have denied that they are useful idiots today after a series of e-mails seemed to prove that they were...
My missile is bigger than your missile Trump tells Kim Jong Un
Donald Trump has started a Twitter row with Kim Jong Un over the size of their missiles.
Kim had yesterday claimed he possesses a missile...
US announces National Police Shooting League
Excitement is mounting in the United States ahead of the launch of the National Police Shooting League.
20,000 law enforcement agencies will be competing for...
Election Was Rigged Claims Trump – Recount Demanded
Donald Trump has sensationally claimed that the 2016 US Presidential Election was rigged and he is demanding a recount.
Trump apologises for misreading email.
President Donald J. Trump has apologised for misreading an email which has led to some bizarre policy announcements in the last few days.
The President was...
Car bombs not as bad as nicking stationery insists Martin ‘I’m a politician’ McGuiness
Former number three in the Irish presidential election Seamus Martin Pointa McGuinness has resigned from his position as Deputy First Minister of Northern Ireland.
The...
Anyone actively calling for a war to be automatically drafted to the front line
Anybody saying there should be a war may be required to put their money where their mouth is in future.
In a new bid to...
Trump appoints Rochdale Herald editor chief of intelligence
More details have been emerging of the structure of the Trump elected new administration which is taking shape.
Amid the circulating rumours of secret talks...
Historic ruling means Saudi men finally allowed to make women driver jokes
Equality campaigners were today celebrating as Saudi Arabia made a long-overdue change to its oppressive rules which prevent men from making jokes about women's...
Britain plans Brexit trade deal ‘perverts for peace’
Following the embarrassment of the spectacular failure of a hideously expensive program to rehabilitate sex offenders, Ministry of Justice officials are arranging study visits...
