Amazon Tribe

Jeremy Hunt worshipped as God of pestilence and disease by Amazonian Tribe

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An offshoot of the Kawahiva people of the Amazon, only recently discovered, are revealed to be remarkably aware of Jeremy Hunt, the health secretary. "Our...
Ainsley Harriott

Ainsley Harriott kicked out of satanic death cult for using too much turmeric

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Speaking privately to The Rochdale Herald’s Donna Bellievitti, Satanic cultist and alleged writer Lynda la Plante discussed his expulsion from the group. "Look it's simple...

Religion stupid confirms Jesus

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"Religion is very stupid and the way you practice it is frankly divisive," said Jesus. His good friend, Mohammad, agreed wholeheartedly, adding "seriously, some of...

Church of England still utterly irrelevant clergy decide

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After a long and protracted three year conversation with one another, Anglican clerics in silly fancy dress have said marriage should only be between...

I’m nothing like Pope antichrist tells DUP

6
In an exclusive interview with The Rochdale Herald, the antichrist tells the DUP "I'm nothing like the Pope!" On a damp and surprisingly chilly June...

Awkward moment for Prince Andrew at nativity as virgin told she will have a...

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There were awkward scenes for Prince Andrew today at a nativity in Sandringham when a virgin was told she will  have a baby. The Prince...
Angry Man Christmas

Rochdale man disappointed he hasn’t been arrested for wishing people Merry Christmas

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A Rochdale man has been telling us that he is furious that he hasn't yet been arrested for wishing people a Merry Christmas. Bill Board,...

Mary and Joseph to appear on the Jeremy Kyle Show following immaculate conception doubts

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The parents of Jesus Christ, Mary and Joseph, will appear on a festive edition of the Jeremy Kyle Show next week, following doubts over...

Bishop of Coventry confused over sexuality

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The Right Reverend Christopher Cocksworth has admitted to sexual confusion, after screwing up a General Synod vote on gay marriage. "I didn't know which way...

Belinda Carlisle vindicated as Heaven proved to be a place on Earth.

4
The scientific and religious worlds were in shock yesterday after a newly discovered island in a remote part of the Indian Ocean was found...
People on bus laughing

Religious fervour hits Rochdale bus passengers

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A local member of one of the world's 4200 religions is utterly convinced that his is the correct one.   Stating confidently that “It is,...

God bothering Stephen Fry to be stoned to death for blasphemy, the pure gobshite

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Stephen Fry has been summoned to appear in the Irish Courts to face the charge of breaching the Irish Defamation Act. It comes after the...

ISIS claim responsibility for self-service checkouts

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So called 'Islamic State'  have claimed responsibility for supermarket self service checkouts. A statement released by ISIS said they came up with the idea after...

Jesus demands separate birthday and Christmas presents

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Jesus Christ has gone on the record to say that he is absolutely sick and tired of relatives and friends buying him joint birthday and Christmas presents.

Proof of God spotted in East Midlands

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Huddersfield photographer Golcar Matt snapped a cloud in the shape of Great Britain, and meteorologists are debating its religious significance. “It is a clear sign...
Jesus Good Friday

Good Friday wasn’t one of my best Fridays admits Jesus

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Jesus H Christ has taken to social media in support of Tesco saying that, despite claims by religious extremists Good Friday was actually a...

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