Ainsley Harriott kicked out of satanic death cult for using too much turmeric
Speaking privately to The Rochdale Herald’s Donna Bellievitti, Satanic cultist and alleged writer Lynda la Plante discussed his expulsion from the group.
"Look it's simple...
‘Corporal punishment should be reinstated’ – people against Sharia law
A recent survey of lobotomised knuckle dragging fuck nuggets revealed that they are fighting against the values that they themselves hold most dear.
We caught...
Satirist attempts to write Muhammad joke in bid to appease angry ‘Christians’
A writer for the internet's biggest Rochdale-based satire site, The Rochdale Herald, has spent the past 15 minutes trying to conjure up some sort...
Good Friday wasn’t one of my best Fridays admits Jesus
Jesus H Christ has taken to social media in support of Tesco saying that, despite claims by religious extremists Good Friday was actually a...
NRA and Gideons to issue guns in bibles
In response to the recent awful church shooting, the question has to be, why can’t everyone have guns?
If everyone was armed this wouldn’t...
Dalai Lama fury over Louis Smith Buddha is a fat bastard comments
The Dalai Lama is said to be incandescently furious with Louis Smith after he was overheard calling Buddha a "fat fucker".
Two time Olympic Pommel...
Rochdale man disappointed he hasn’t been arrested for wishing people Merry Christmas
A Rochdale man has been telling us that he is furious that he hasn't yet been arrested for wishing people a Merry Christmas.
Bill Board,...
Awkward moment for Joseph as Jesus gets Ancestry UK DNA testing kit for Christmas
In what has been described as the most awkward Christmas gift ever; Jesus has been given an Ancestry UK DNA testing kit for Christmas.
One...
Atheists pilgrimage to Dawkins’ home after Darwin appears on toast
Hundreds of atheists have laid siege to the home of renowned ethnologist and evolutionary biologist Richard Dawkins after he reported finding an image of...
If Barry Manilow is gay then I’m a Catholic says Pope
Housewives favourite and renowned woman shagger Barry Manilow stunned the world yesterday by finally revealing he's gay.
Shouty, hypocritical know it all becomes leader of First Atheist church
A loud mouth atheist has taken his levels of preaching about all organized religion being evil to such lengths that he has organized a...
US replaces health insurance with crossed fingers, hoping and prayer
There has been a wave of concern regarding universal access to healthcare across the United States after Donald Trump, Mike Pence and the GOP officially repealed Obamacare...
Outrage as ban on Christmas turns out to be false
People across the country have expressed outrage in response to the revelation that a ban on Christmas has been revealed to be false.
An image...
Jeremy Hunt worshipped as God of pestilence and disease by Amazonian Tribe
An offshoot of the Kawahiva people of the Amazon, only recently discovered, are revealed to be remarkably aware of Jeremy Hunt, the health secretary.
"Our...
Paul Nuttall resigns as Archbishop of Canterbury
In a shock move Thursday Paul Nuttall, Member of the European Parliament for North West England EP and leader of the United Kingdom Independence...
Experts agree that Josh Widdicombe is not bigger than Jesus
Theologists now agree that diminutive Josh Widdicombe is not the Second Coming of Our Lord Jesus Christ.
Speculation had run rife that, having been born...



















































