Pope declares all good atheists can go to heaven
In a surprise ecumenical encyclical from the Vatican, Pope Francis has indicated that atheists could be allowed to pass through the Pearly Gates and...
Parents of nativity play’s King Herod unsure what this says about their parenting
A Rochdale teacher has been telling the Herald about how this year's school nativity has been dogged by endless controversy.
The teacher, who asked not...
Jeremy Corbyn branded anti-Semitic after celebrating crucifixion of Jewish man
Jeremy Corbyn has been forced to deny further allegations of anti-Semitism after being spotted celebrating the crucifixion of a Jewish man.
The Jewish man in...
Proof of God spotted in East Midlands
Huddersfield photographer Golcar Matt snapped a cloud in the shape of Great Britain, and meteorologists are debating its religious significance.
“It is a clear sign...
Vicar attacked for dropping Easter from Easter Sunday
A 45 year-old Rochdale man is recovering in hospital today after being attacked for not referring to this coming Sunday as ‘Easter Sunday’.
The victim,...
Experts agree that Josh Widdicombe is not bigger than Jesus
Theologists now agree that diminutive Josh Widdicombe is not the Second Coming of Our Lord Jesus Christ.
Speculation had run rife that, having been born...
Terrorists rejoice at lower energy bills as Jihadis unplug TVs
Terrorists worldwide are saving money on their energy bills as millions of Jihadis unplug their Samsung smart TVs from mains sockets.
The move comes after...
US replaces health insurance with crossed fingers, hoping and prayer
There has been a wave of concern regarding universal access to healthcare across the United States after Donald Trump, Mike Pence and the GOP officially repealed Obamacare...
Westboro Baptist Churchgoers saddened by news that God actually hates FAQ’s
Congregation of famously homophobic church disheartened to learn that The Almighty is 'proper hacked off with being asked the same dumb shit over and...
Outrage as ban on Christmas turns out to be false
People across the country have expressed outrage in response to the revelation that a ban on Christmas has been revealed to be false.
An image...
Trump to brave Muslim controlled no go area during UK Visit
Despite the advice of Fox News commentator, Steven Emerson, advisors to Donald Trump have said that there is a strong possibility that the so-called...
Jesus demands separate birthday and Christmas presents
Jesus Christ has gone on the record to say that he is absolutely sick and tired of relatives and friends buying him joint birthday and Christmas presents.
Jesus to have birthday party in August
Jesus Christ has gone on the record to say that he is absolutely sick and tired of relatives and friends buying him joint birthday and Christmas presents.
I’m nothing like Pope antichrist tells DUP
In an exclusive interview with The Rochdale Herald, the antichrist tells the DUP "I'm nothing like the Pope!"
On a damp and surprisingly chilly June...
NRA and Gideons to issue guns in bibles
In response to the recent awful church shooting, the question has to be, why can’t everyone have guns?
If everyone was armed this wouldn’t...
Dalai Lama fury over Louis Smith Buddha is a fat bastard comments
The Dalai Lama is said to be incandescently furious with Louis Smith after he was overheard calling Buddha a "fat fucker".
Two time Olympic Pommel...
