UKIP appoint woman who put that cat in wheelie bin as advisor on cat...
The collection of gammon faced halfwits known as the UK Independence party has appointed the internationally famous cat abuser Mary Bale as an advisor...
Millionaires ‘very sorry’ following £70,000 fine
A political party full of millionaires has said that the huge £70,000 fine they received for breaking electoral rules will really teach them a...
Letter F dies of embarrassment during conference speech
Paramedics and specialists in typesetting were seen rushing to the site of a terrifying incident at the Conservative Party conference in Manchester earlier in...
Boris catches coronavirus despite consistently washing hands of all responsibility
Finally, after what feels like years of writing about this car crash of a government you NHS applauding, social distance ignoring flag shaggers voted...
Trident Subs: Gotta catch ’em all
Speaking at the Nato summit in Warsaw this week, David Cameron has hinted that almost £16bn ear-marked for the renewal of the Trident nuclear...
Brexit Party Manifesto a Wetherspoon’s menu with curry crossed out with crayon
The Brexit Party has finally unveiled their much anticipated election manifesto ahead of the EU elections.
To much fanfare the document has been revealed to...
CABINET RESHUFFLE – Boris Johnson becomes Health Secretary
Theresa May's eagerly anticipated cabinet reshuffle has begun.
In what some would describe as "a bit of a surprise", the former Mayor of London and...
Leamington to become post Brexit English capital
The Warwickshire town of Leamington could become the new English capital following the United Kingdom's departure from the European union, sources close to prime...
NHS Funding: Less is more insists Jeremy Hunt
A government source told us yesterday that robot eyed shitkicker Jeremy Hunt has decided to take a more philosophical approach to the NHS crisis.
Dr...
Foxes Just ‘Scarves With Legs’ Says Tory Think-Tank
During the snap election called by Theresa May one controversial proposal to emerge from the Tory manifesto was the abolishment of the fox-hunting ban....
Dacre overjoyed as Khan hints at Brexit backdown
There are reports of loud and frenzied whooping sounds coming from the office of Daily Mail editor Paul Dacre this afternoon at the news...
Winning a general election easier than taking benefits from orphans says woman who took...
Like the irritating eager new guy at work, dark Sith Lord and unelected PM, Theresa May, announced a snap general election 15 minutes before...
Prince Charles admits years of talking to vegetables perfect preparation for Trump visit
Prince Charles has confirmed that years of talking to vegetables at Highgrove are the perfect preparation for meeting Donald Trump today.
There's been a...
Brexit Cancelled as Civil Servants Finally Read “Article 50”
All nations attending Treaty discussions are only allocated one car parking space.
UK plans for "Brexit" have hit the buffers after Westminster Civil Servants finally...
Britain First’s meme maker in coma
As Poppy Day draws ever closer, the strain of making anti Muslim memes has proven to much for Britain First's head of social media, Tommy...
Hard Core Fans Dismayed as PJ Harvey Admires Theresa May’s Shoes
Hardcore fans of uncompromising musician Polly Jean (PJ) Harvey have reacted angrily to their musical idol expressing admiration for Prime Minister Theresa Mary May's...
