Anarchists angered at police refusal to follow rules

22
A group of Rochdale anarchists have been telling the Herald about the treatment they received at the hands of the German police at the...

Hunt solves NHS waiting list crisis with introduction of geological clock

0
Health Secretary Jeremy Hunt has solved the problem of NHS waiting times by making hospitals use the geological clock.  After coming under increasing pressure from...

That’s it I’m done in this realm – Satan

0
His most eminent dark overlord, Satan, has asked The Rochdale Herald to issue the following statement: "I had 2 bottles of Jackie Dee and wrote...
Jeremy Corbyn

Young people should not be ignored says old man ignoring young people

35
Jeremy Corbyn sought to reconnect with young people today over Brexit by sacking the last of the Remainers in the Shadow Cabinet for suggesting...
Jeremy Corbyn

Commie Corbyn pledges to nationalise your teeth

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Bearded Trotskyite do-gooder, Jeremy Corbyn has taken a break from sending care packages full of homemade jam to terrorists, to nationalise absolutely everything. Clueless commie...

Party Leader Debate format Paul Nuttal noisily arguing with himself for an hour

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News broke earlier today that Labour leader and bewildered Billy goat, Jeremy Corbyn, would not be participating in the upcoming televised debates ahead of the General...
Rees Mogg

Argument for abortion makes argument against abortion

55
Underchinned Tory leadership hopeful Jacob Rees-Mogg has upset both women and homosexuals today by saying he is opposed to same-sex marriage and abortion under...

If the Irish don’t want Apple’s £11BN tell them we’ll have it – say...

0
It transpires that North Sea Oil Revenues now contribute £60Million to the Scottish revenue pot, down from almost £13Billion a couple of years ago...

Corbyn treated for dizziness after performing student debt pirouette on Andrew Marr Show

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Jeremy Corbyn is reported to be recovering this afternoon after suffering a severe bout of dizziness following the performance of a pirouette on student...

Corbyn supporters call for reselection of Copeland constituency

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After Labour's marginal win in Stoke and devastating Loss in Copeland by elections, Left wing Labour supporters are calling for reselection of the constituency. Speaking to disappointed...

People Telling Me I Shouldn’t Have Told Schoolgirl To F*ck Off Can F*ck Off...

4
The Conservative MP for Wells, James 'Compost' Heappey got all sweary when visiting the massively overpriced Millfield Academy for Young Toffs and Toffettes.  A Scottish...

Treasury seek OAP to sit in baked beans to fund Social Services

0
In a surprise press release, the Treasury have today revealed a novel initiative to bolster funding for cash-starved Social Services. In the statement, Chancellor of...

Remain campaigners thwarted by import shortage of “I Told You So”s

0
Anti-Brexit campaigners are suffering from a shortage of "I Told You So"s, as "Project Fear" rapidly swings into "Operation I Told You So", as...

Skeletor still ‘pretty buff’ for a skeleton

0
Men's Health Magazine today announced its annual Top Ten Fittest Male Celebs list with actor, recently elected DUP MP and self proclaimed evil overlord Skeletor...

Diane Abbott suspended from Labour Party for calling Tory Front Bench ‘crackers’

6
Labour Shadow Home Secretary, Diane Abbott, has been suspended from the party after it emerged she was accused of using a racist slur during...
Bucket of Coal

Jeremy Corbyn’s children still enjoying playing with their new coal

0
Jeremy Corbyn’s children reportedly had a brilliant Christmas and are still enjoying playing with the new coal their Dad bought them.

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