Saint George will be denied entry visa under proposed post Brexit immigration rules

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Brexiters across the land were furious today with the news that proposed changes to immigration rules after Brexit make it highly likely Saint George...

Happy Christmas to our Sovereign Parliament and readers

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On behalf of the Daily Mail, we would like to wish all our readers a very Happy Christmas. Or if they don't celebrate Christmas,...

Corbyn warned to Beware the Ides of March

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Jeremy Corbyn, twice elected leader of the Labour party has been warned by a soothsayer to "Beware the Ides of March". It comes days after the...
Boris Johnson

Boris’ Barney buggering off says barber

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In a hair raising exclusive, The Rochdale Herald has discovered the secret to the frankly unhinged character of the Foreign Secretary, Boris Johnson is...

Labour to legalise Liam Fox hunting confirms Jeremy Corbyn

Labour has confirmed a new manifesto pledge today following the announcement by Theresa May to allow a free vote on reversing the 2004 fox...

Is there something Stephen Crabb isn’t telling us?

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In a dramatically uncharacteristic move Stephen Crabb, the former intern at  anti-equality fundamentalist Christian group CARE and employer of interns from the anti-equality fundamentalist...
Pensioners

Remain camp optimistic about outcome of second referendum following forecasts of harsh winter

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Reports of a harsh winter allied with a fuel crisis has buoyed hopes of remaining part of the EC. Remain campaigner Frank Anwalther said "We...

Mr Tumble denounces Theresa May and says not in our name.

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Leading clowns have issued a joint statement confirming that Theresa May's latest attacks on migrants and the NHS are not part of traditional clown...

Obviously you should agree with me, it’s 2017 say progressives, obviously

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People across the nation are up in arms that other people don’t apparently realise that it’s the current year. “It’s 2017,” said Faye Zbuk-Warrior,” I...

Dianne Abbott assures voters she’s feeling better after taking a Paracetamol

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Dianne Abbott, the MP for Stoke Newington and The Shadow Secretary for Health, has assured both parliament and her constituents that she has almost completely recovered from having a bit of a headache.
Rock Paper Scissors

Trump and Putin fail to beat each other in two hour long rock, paper,...

3
Presidents Donald Trump and Vladimir Putin met face to face for the first time in public yesterday and went for each other in a...

Socialism just a phase says privately educated Cambridge graduate Blairite quitting Labour for V&A

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Tristram Hunt had "returned to the fold" and told his friends and family that "his life a socialist was just a phase".
Jeremy Corbyn

Corbo makes his ex Home Secretary

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Jeremy Corbyn has appointed Diane Abbott as Home Secretary, placing her opposite Amber Rudd on the shadow front bench. "We want someone who represents the...
Theresa May

“Don’t worry, my government will soon be gone.” May reassures a worried public

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Theresa May stood outside 10 Downing Street this afternoon to reassure an increasingly worried country that, "Don't worry, my government will soon be gone." "It...

David Davis hospitalised after failing to negotiate his way out of wet paper bag

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It is reported that every staff member on the exercise rapidly ripped a hole into the side of the giant, wet paper bag and emerged unscathed and rejuvenated, except David Davis, who seemed to struggle.
Hide an Seek

Theresa May wins coveted Parliamentary Cross Party Hide and Seek Trophy

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Prime minister Theresa May has won the 2017 Parliamentary Cross Party Hide and Seek Trophy ahead of stiff competition. "It was an incredible effort from...

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