Trump enlists Gary Glitter to play inauguration
There are reports that Donald Trump is struggling to find top acts to perform or present at his inaugural event.
The demagogue was able to...
Stickupthearseitis
A new disease, spread apparently by social media, is endangering the nation.
Stickupthearseitis affects hundreds of people everyday and symptoms include getting salty over satire...
Britain First Announces Pact With Lizard People
Britain First, the right-wing political party for twats of all ages, has announced a revolutionary partnership with The Lizard People, a secretive reptilian group of aliens...
Commie Corbyn pledges to nationalise your teeth
Bearded Trotskyite do-gooder, Jeremy Corbyn has taken a break from sending care packages full of homemade jam to terrorists, to nationalise absolutely everything.
Clueless commie...
Tests prove evolution has stopped among UKIP supporters
Groundbreaking research at Rochdale Technical University's Institute of Genetic Engineering has confirmed that evolution has stopped working, and in some cases is being reversed,...
I meant Hindenburg Disaster not Hillsborough Says Nuttall
Paul Nuttall has sought to lay to rest the controversy over his claims to have been present at the Hillsborough disaster, initially by explaining...
Theresa May thrilled that Russia thinks she’s competent enough to stage poisoning
Bill Board, spokesman for the Government, has told The Rochdale Herald that Theresa May is privately thrilled that the Russian Government has accused her...
Giant Fish Finger and Lord Buckethead asked by Queen to prepare to govern
The Giant Fish Finger and Lord Buckethead have been asked by the Queen to prepare to govern Britain.
A spokesman for the Palace explained it...
Prime Minister Theresa May autobiography to be made into a feature film
Footloose 2 will follow the adventures of a band of feisty teens who live in a town where dancing on Sundays is against...
Nobody arsed about Green Party Manifesto leak
Last night a draft of Labour's election manifesto was leaked leading to pro Brexit outrage paper, The Daily Mail, drawing comparisons between Labour's proposed policies and...
UK in shock as Boris Johnson steps down
The people of the United Kingdom took a collective gasp today, Wednesday 1st of April, as Boris Johnson announced he would be stepping down.
"This...
Gun sales rise 300% ahead of Trump Inauguration
American gun sales have enjoyed a steep rise in the days leading up to the President elect's inauguration.
"It's almost 200% more than when Bush...
Most Brexiteers cheat at Monopoly study finds
Researchers at Rochdale College have found evidence that seems to show most Brexiteers cheat during family games of Monopoly.
Dr Frederick Seddon told us, "We...
Brexit means Brexit, obviously, says Jeremy Corbyn
'Brexit means Brexit and we're going to make a success of it', Jeremy Corbyn will say this afternoon.
He will speak from the top of...
Jacob Rees-Mogg completely opposed to jazz music and women in trousers under any circumstances
During an appearance on The One Show this week, Conservative leadership favourite and plum-voiced time traveller, Jacob Rees-Mogg admitted his firm 1920s beliefs meant...
Vazeline Intensive Care
Labour MP Keith Vaz, who recently quit as Chair of the Home Affairs Select Committee is claimed to have claimed that there was nothing...



















































