Wales Seeks Independence as Gareth Bale Doubles Welsh GDP
Carwyn Jones has changed his mind on Welsh Independence after Gareth Bale’s new contract doubled the GDP of Wales.
David Brent to sing Equality Street at Trump Inauguration
Following the shock withdrawal of Bruce Springsteen tribute band the B-Street Band from the Trump Inauguration David Brent is thrilled to announce that his band Foregone Conclusion have agreed terms to perform.
Theresa May reveals plans for future funding cuts.
Theresa May faced the press this week in a hope to clarify future government spending. In an exclusive interview with the Rochdale Herald she...
Marty McFly and Dr Emmett Brown arrested for crimes against humanity for failing to...
The time travelling duo, Marty McFly and Dr Emmett Brown, are currently being held in the custody of Sheriff James Strickland in Hill Valley, Northern California.
Strickland...
Despot responsible for mass starvation and crimes against humanity meets Saudi Prince
The Crown Prince of Saudi Arabia has raised concerns about human rights in the United Kingdom during talks with the country's barely elected despot.
Theresa May’s constant turning catches attention of the Royal Ballet
Theresa May has once again been forced into a U turn on policy, this time on the so called 'Dementia Tax'.
It comes after a series...
We either hunt foxes or your children says Theresa May
With the Conservatives promising a return of hunting foxes all over the nation face having to run from a vicious pack of slobbering, howling posh twats...
David Davis chosen as Westminster village idiot from competitive field
Secretary of State for Exiting the European Union, David Davis, has been chosen to hold the esteemed job of Westminster Village Idiot, beating off...
Jeremy Corbyn Guarantees Tory Win By Not Jerking Knee
The chance of Conservative Party rule evaporated today. Jeremy Corbyn is to talk about the nuances of foreign policy and its consequences.
"It's an outrage!" stated...
DUP explains kneecapping naughtier than running through wheat field
Talks between the Conservatives and the DUP are said to be ongoing as the PM desperately tries to cobble together a slim working majority...
Brexit means Brexit means Brexit means Brexit confirms EU Brexit negotiator
"It's taken us a week to work out just how clever you Brits are," said negotiator Hans Upp. "We thought it was just a...
Bands line up to celebrate Trump’s impeachment
The Rochdale Herald can exclusively reveal the star studded line up already in place for celebrating the impeachment of Donald Trump, expected to take...
Jeremy Corbyn to lose seat under Tory boundary change plans
Lord Reginald Foxhunter-Shandy said: "It's the biggest boundary shake up since the last one".
The plans unveiled today will see Jeremy Corbyn lose his Islington...
Political satire not funny when it’s about Corbyn, says humourless twerp
Taking the mick out of Tories is fine but leave Corbyn alone, according to Frank Lennon, a Rochdale Momentum member.
"The Tories are evil and...
Farron Accepts Offer of Education Secretary As May Offers Anti-Brexit Coaltion
Tim Farron spoke of his relief this evening as he accepted Theresa May's offer of a coalition government on the condition of an anti-Brexit...
ISIS win the war by leaving passports at home
America, Russia and the United Nations admitted defeat earlier today and proclaimed ISIS the winners of the global holy war.
President elect Trump has already...
